Do you talk to your children about emotional wellbeing? Share with the GDST for a chance to win a £300 John Lewis voucher

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There’s been a huge change over the years in how we speak out mental health, and it’s becoming more and more apparent that we need to be educating our children about their emotional wellbeing as well. The Girls’ Day School Trust (GDST), a family of 25 schools across the UK, would like to hear your views on how we can help children to be happy and feel good in the world.

What do you think affects your children's mental health and how do you talk to them about it? Do you think exam pressure or even entrance exams cause your children stress? Does social media affect your children? Do they talk to you about their emotions or do you approach the topic of mental health if you see them struggling? Do you think mental health and wellbeing should be discussed and taught in schools?

Please share how you talk to your children about their emotional wellbeing and you will be entered into a prize draw to win a £300 voucher of your choice (from a list).

Thanks

MNHQ

Terms and conditions apply

My son suffers with anxiety and we try and speak to him about mindfulness and expressing himself rather than bottling his feelings up. I believe all secondary schools should have access to a counsellor especially as there seems to be such a lot of pressure on children these days.

I always encourage them to have a positive attitude and realise that not everyday is good but there usually is some good in everyday! I always ask them what was the best thing that happened during the day! But they also know if something is on their mind or bothering them they can talk to us and try and help them sort it out

I regularly make sure my children know that its good to talk and they know they should always come to me or their Dad if they have anything on their minds! I teach my children that its not good to bottle up upset or anger. I am confident they will always offload their problems to us.. my most used phrase is 'if we don't know - we can't help you and we will always help with anything' :)
So important to keep talking!

We have a child with ASD and a NT child, so we've always needed to use a differentiated approach to talking about emotional wellbeing and mental health. With NT ds2 it has been important to make ourselves available, maintain a general level of emotional closeness and encourage him to see conversations about his thoughts and feelings as a normal part of everyday life. With ASD ds1, we've built a more structured framework for discussing his emotional life and keeping ourselves in the loop; social stories, turn-taking "good thing, bad thing" during mealtimes, having a mechanism for him to send us FB messages and even leave us notes when he needs to talk about something.

We try to model healthy behaviour around emotional self-care to both boys - we'll discuss conflicts after they've happened and make space for everyone to say how they're feeling, and dh and I will disagree calmly in front of them about small things, so they can see us dealing with conflict in a loving and respectful way. We try to build communication into the daily routine - for example, I'm always there and available and interested in the hour after they come home from school, so if something has upset them it's as easy as it can be for them to talk to me about it. Similarly at night we still have a hug/kiss/chat before they go to bed, and DH goes up and tucks them in individually (they're 14 and 16 now) so if feelings or worries come to the surface at night, or if they want to talk to DH rather than me, the opportunity is there.

My eldest has just started school so I keep it simple,but she does a bit get anxious sometimes and then we talk about keeping well.

I talk to mine all the time about it, son is more open now he is older but our daughter is very open, we believe emotional well being is as important as physical well being

My boys are still very young, but this issue is of paramount importance to me, as I lost an uncle and close friend to suicide, and I have also worked with male adolescents affected by complex trauma. Sadly we still live in a world where men are not encouraged to talk about their emotions as openly as women. Society expects boys and men to be strong, often to the detriment of their mental health. I would love to see a shift in society whereby everyone feels confident enough to open up about their feelings. Admitting to difficulties in this area is a sign of strength, not weakness. Things are improving, but there is still a long way to go. I admire the work of Princes William and Harry in de-stigmatising mental health, and I absolutely think that this topic needs to be covered in schools.

I'm very open with my kids about mental illness as I want them to be able to talk about any problems they have when they're older.

Every evening after school we discuss happiness and what things can make you happy or sad, if someone has said something silly we work out if it is a joke and why they said it and it makes a big difference.

We talk about feelings quite a bit. About how all feelings are valid and how we deal with them.

We also practice mindfulness and have some brilliant cards called mindful monsters from scope and do these exercises regularly.

I work on making dd feel like a full member of our family and talk about major decisions with her (such as job changes) and we talk about how things will affect her and we talk about any anxieties she may have.

This is such an interesting topic and I am so keen to learn more. My daughter is very emotional and often tells me that she is crying but not sure why. The best thing I feel that I can do is to encourage my daughter to talk about how she feels and to encourage her that she can talk to me no matter what. She likes to talk and have reassurance. SHe is also very creative, likes writing stories and songs and I think this is a good avenue for her to express her thoughts. Mental health and wellbeing absolutely must be taught at school.

I always try and talk to DS6 about the feelings he's experiencing. If he's worried or a bit anxious about something I talk it through with him and make sure i dont dismiss it by saying 'oh don't worry it will be fine'

I need some more details.........

We try to be as honest and open as possible

I think it is so important to talk about emotional wellbeing from a young age so that they know there is nothing wring with talking about their feelings when they are older and hopefully it will encourage dialogue and they will know they don't have to keep their feelings bottled in as I think so long as they can talk openly and freely we can hopefully sort out any problems as a family.

Be upfront and honest about life and emotions especially sensitive subjects like bereavement. It is a face that we are born, we live we die, end of.

We promote open ,honest communication, and endeavor to listen actively. Thus setting an example that we hope the children adopt and use themselves.

I talk to mine all the time about it, I tell them its good to talk, and they can tell me anything.

IT's good to always try to talk about everything so children get used to being open about their emotions

I treat conversations of this nature with them above all others whether that be academic/social etc. I always stress that no problem is ever so big that it needs to be handled on their own

My DSD is in her early teens and is a little overweight. When she started secondary school, she was bullied over her weight and also because she is considerably taller than the other girls in her year. She became very upset but her mum really wasn't helpful because she kept saying things like "Oh don't be silly" or "Can't you just eat less" and this just made her even more upset and less willing to talk. However, DH has been very patient and encouraged her to talk to him bit by bit, and has reinforced lots of positives with her. He's tried to explain to his ex that her dismissing DSD's concerns as 'silly' are potentially damaging but she doesn't get it. DSD does talk to her dad every day and she's become a lot more confident and open about talking about any problems with him.
It's really important to listen, and not just dismiss worries, no matter how large or small the adults may perceive them to be.

we are open about our feelings and talk lots, which helps. Thankfully none of our DCs have experienced poor mental health or had stress. They all are so laid back. Don't know where they get it from!

This is going to really out me.
Because there is currently no education on mental health in junior schools I've just started to put together some workshops to take into local schools to educate children on mental health. I will be trialing it at one school first and if it works well then I'll take them to my other local junior schools and nationwide if I can get the support and backing to do so.
I aim to deliver the workshops through arts and crafts and a little bit of drama. I want children to understand that its ok to have those kinds of feelings and what to do if you feel like that or if you think someone you know has a mental health issue etc... because children love getting certificates I want to be able to provide each child with a certificate of completion once the workshops are finished to certify that thay understand and promise to look out for each other but most importantly TALK! The certificate will also serve as a reminder to children to be nice and to talk.
I'm currently using an Instagram page that I use to document my own Mental Health issues aswell as talk about my plans on the workshops, if anyone would like to have a look I'm indecisivelibra85. I do plan on creating a new page purely for the project at some point.