NOW CLOSED: Tell us who's the messiest in your house (honest, now!) £100 IKEA vouchers up for grabs!

[HelenMumsnet]

Hello. We been asked by IKEA to find out who you reckon is the messiest person in your house.

Do you agree with comedian Tiffany Stevenson, who says, in the new IKEA ad, that "the only thing a man will ever clear out is his internet history"?

Or do you wince with recognition at Paul Pirie's umbraged-male retort: "Shoes, shoes, shoes! What are you, a centipede?"

Please post on this thread to tell us who's the 'floordrobe'-owner in your house - the more scruffy, cluttery, bomb-gone-off detail, the better! Everyone who does will be in with a chance to win £100 in IKEA vouchers.

Oh, and IKEA is running a Facebook poll, too, if you fancy casting your vote.

Thanks - and good luck! MNHQ

This would be me...I just don't have time to tidy up and it drives my husband mad! He is often ranting that he only cleared up this morning and I've managed to make it look like a bombsite again in just a few hours!

My husband is one of those that likes tins to be organised with the label facing onwards etc so who know what he saw in me! My one year old son is too much like his daddy sometimes but it's good when he wants to put all his toys away before we go out.

DH is so immaculately tidy I wonder whether he was secretly in the military. He is organised, time efficient and good at housework. .

On the other hand I can walk into a room and make it messy. Before I met DH it was not unusual for me to lose my bedroom floor. The DC's are somewhere between but I hope they don't take after me.

No gender stereotypes in our home, sorry!

Hmmm think it has to be the 11 year old DD. Her room is always a tip and shoes, homework, coat, bag, wrappers, empty drinks bottles etc follow in her wake.
Followed by the younger DDs, DP and then me and frankly non of us is madly tidy at all.

It's me. Fortunately DH is anal so it all works rather well.

i am the messiest - i am also the ''tidy fairy' most of the time.

so it works out.

my children enjoy tidying. so far.

ds who has SN. Drops everything always then falls over it or screams when can't find something. Second is probably me

Me.

My daughter reminds me to tidy up before bedtime. She's 2.

I took a day off work recently to tidy the house. There's 2 adults and 2 children here. 90% of the tidying was my stuff.

Our dd is the messiest person in our house.

I am a but of a neat freak. DH has become so too as he doesn't really want a divorce . I suppose that leaves the children (4) and (2). However at DD1's recent parents evening her teacher delighted in telling me how much she enjoys "tidy up time".

Without a doubt, its ds2 even our 2 year old dd knows its him! She has been known to react to my wails of despair with the highly astute observation "Ds2 made a huuuge mess - again!" without even looking in his room first.

He has the incredible ability to walk into a pristine room and walk out again five minutes later, leaving it resembling an explosion in a toy factory.

His co-conspirators are the manufacturers of Lego and I am currently leaning towards the belief that Lego, particularly Bionicle, has in fact a life of its own and works in tandem with ds to make sure I injure my poor feet on a daily basis by treading on the sharpest piece imaginable.

Even more incredible than his impressive super-power for wrecking the place, is his even more spectacular ability to flop dramatically on the floor and sob when asked to tidy up his own mess. You really would believe that something dire had just befallen him should you ever happen across one of his 'performances'. His poor brother (ds1) ends up tidying up his mess for him half the time, as they share a room and the alternative is living constantly ankle deep in Lego and Gogos Crazy Bones.

The final strategy in his plot for world house domination, seems to be to spread his unique form of Lego mayhem from his bedroom to the kitchen table, where it appears to breed when we are not looking. Then, come mealtimes, when asked to clear the table, we are once again treated to a perfectly executed performance of despair and helplessness, complete with sobbing and enreaties to help him before he expires from tidying up exhaustion.

Its a good job he has many, many good qualities or I may well be tempted to build him his very own house (out of Lego of course) and condemn him to live a life of daily impaled feet and blocked vacuum cleaners.

MNHQ I am surprised you've associated yourself with such a cliched, sexist ad campaign

DD (11) - she takes after her Grandma

My DD (2.4) is currently lining up her broccoli on the floor and then squashing it with her nose. She will shortly be returning to the front of the line to eat it, no hands style.

But then again, I'm the one just watching her do it.......

Definitely DS2. He's highly skilled in hiding the floor.

And you should see the mess he left after he ate the mother's day cupcake he "made" me at school, while I was distracted with DS1 (I did give it to him to eat, he didn't help himself!). He discovered it was very crumbly indeed . The carpets need a scrub now, because the dyson doesn't clean up ground in scotbloc :o

We are both as bad as eachother and we are both awful. Hopefully our DS (3 months) will rebel by being a neat freak otherwise we could well feature on some kind of 'life of grime' programme in the future.

Guests who use the toilet often find a trail of my and DH's pants trailing through the bathroom although if they have made it upstairs they will have already had to dodge the tide of 'things I have moved out of the sitting room because they don't live there' which have been stacked on the stairs ready for the day I put them away, whenever that will be. DH just threw away the half eaten packet of oatcakes I had left over from when I was in labour - they have been on the floor in the hallway since December.

We never put anything back where it belongs because we don't really have places for things. Recently I have been buying baskets and boxes to store stuff in. I just chuck it in, put the lid on - job done. trouble is that if I decide I need that oojamaflip I know I saw somewhere last week then I have to root through my boxes of crap to find it!

Sadly, that is me.

Even dd 3 goes around closing drawers/doors/dishwasher after me , and goes around tidying rooms (admittedly that involves putting things on the sofa - however...........)

Funnily enough though I don't think I am dirty iyswim I just don't put things away..........

Obviously dh has a floordrobe. Obviously I do not. I have an exercisebikedrobe

There's no hope for the dc really .....

Me, but DP is rather OCD about cleaning and tidying.

The only room in this home that my husband is responsible for is the garage. And this is only because I don't see it on a regular basis. Generally, I can push the hovel to the back of my mind. He does wood work in there.

Come the warm weather however, when I actually need to get into the garage, for frivolous things like the lawnmower, then I have to brave to foreign land.

As I open the garage door, I am surrounded by a snowstorm of epic proportions. But instead of snow, it's wood shavings. And instead of a storm, it's just a sodding mess. Nothing is on the (custom built, by him) shelves, instead everything is strewn all over the floor. And covered by wood shavings. The tools are not on their hooks, they are on the floor. And covered in wood shavings. The bikes are left at the front of the garage, not in their space at the back. And covered in wood shavings.

I cannot go in there without needing a shower. I swear, I am going to suffocate him to death with fricking wood shavings.

Needless to say, I'm in charge of the rest of the house.

We all are! I used to be very house proud and I'm not sure what went wrong, but we are all (12yo Ds, 4yo Dd and myself ~ 47yo!!!) dreadful! however! my Ds is a nightmare for dropping, throwing, burying or just plain hiding his things, especially socks!!! it drives me mad . I send him in search of his dirty (hidden) laundry and he might return with a bit of it, but when I go and search out his room, I find bundles of it scattered about his and his sisters room (they share). It was so bad last week that I took photo's of it to embarrass him! We have no storage space in our house and I'm a true hoarder! I also love crafting and dressmaking, knitting etc and have so much wool, fabrics and the like that it's like a sweat shop! I've also got a Chinese laundry going on in my dining room.
I am a mess!

Fortunately, or perhaps unfortunately, dh and I are fairly equal in our messiness. I actually wish I was married to a neat freak! Or I wish I enjoyed housework more. The three year old tops us all though.

DS2 (6), then me, then DH, then DS3 (2) then DS1 (8). Although I am the one who sorts it all out.

Me. There's no storage in the house so I have piles of books/work all over the place which then fall over. I also hate washing up so will put it off until there's no clean plates.

DH is the worst in our house. Even his idea of tidying is messy - apparently mess doesn't count if it is vertical. So we have endless piles of stuff everywhere

Probably ds1 (aged 4). He won't let me throw anything out !

Middle of a toilet roll - telescope
Box the new tent came in - treasure chest
Random small pieces of plastic packaging - 'my Octonauts undersea world' (which I then every waking moment keeping out of our toddler's reach).

It's sweet but his bedroom looks like a dustbin. I have to bin things in secret and I've a vision of him at 40, still living in a Kim and Aggie nightmare where he's surrounded by mountains of broken bits from old CBeebies magazines!