The Goose & Carrot Pub

[RedRegular]

A thread for all who have DC with SN. The thread is deleted in 90 days and doesn’t show in active. The season is changing and the bar is well stocked.

What happens between the conclusion of the review and the conclusion of the appeal depends on what is in the version of the EHCP that is in force at that point in time, which may not be what is in the current EHCP. If there is a placement named in section I, DS would be entitled to attend that placement if that is what you wanted, but you wouldn’t have to force him if you don’t think that is right. The LA would still be responsible for anything detailed, specified or quantified in F.

For OT, have a look at Donna Podesta, Nikki White, Holly Fenton, Rosie Gibbons, and Anne Marie Baker. Many travel further afield for independent professionals. If you are willing and able to travel further afield, particularly to London, there are some excellent OTs who can look at the sensory side of things.

From your previous posts, a large part of the problem is that lots of the wording in F is vague and woolly.

I think it’s that F is not just not concrete enough but also grouped together “this section is B E and F of the EHC plan”
So is it F or not???

We are just back from parkour. It was really good. We nearly bottled it as I got lost on the way which sends ds into a total tiz. He is very very tired because of the drug change but the guy was excellent.

It doesn’t matter that the sections are laid out alongside each other. They are still B, E and F.

It’s set out as, need, provision, outcome. (B E F) There is an interim section “steps to achieving outcome” but they type “this row is intentionally empty”
I assume F is the bits labelled provision. Some sections in his provision are “skilled and trusted adult 1:1”, and some are “skilled and trusted adult 1:1 working towards small group”.

We ended up at the GP surgery today. They have a ridiculous new AI triage system that only has tick boxes, which means that there's no nuance. My answers came back with 'some of your answers indicate that you should be at A&E' then a choice between 'I'll go to A&E', or 'this is my ongoing condition and I can wait 48 hours'. Then, I got an email saying 'you are invited to make an appointment, click the link', only to get to the booking site and there were no appointments left.

Anyway, the Advanced Nurse Practitioner saw her, then she brought in a GP, who decided that it would be a good idea to get a set of bloods while she's in pain. But they couldn't get her blood despite 2 people trying. I refused to take her to the local hospital to have blood taken, especially as they aren't expecting it to show anything. Then I suddenly felt very unwell and nearly passed out (I think my BP dropped because it was warm in the room), so they had to get me on the couch and get me water.

Anyway, they've made her an appointment tomorrow with a GP who knows her quite well. She's continued to cry this afternoon/evening but is asleep now.

The big animal college SEN officer called today to explore DD2's support needs. They have concerns because they only offer shared TA support and there are 30 students in the class. We are going ahead with the visit the school has booked next week, but it's not going to be suitable. Because we want EOTIC, it would be better for them to say they can't meet need, I think.

DD3 has stopped talking about the teacher who is leaving but is absolutely exhausted and isn't coping with doing academic work at school. Brilliant timing considering her GCSEs start in 2 weeks. But if it's how she's coping, we'll just have to go with.

DD2's car rejection has gone through and we ordered a new one yesterday. It might take 3-4 months to arrive.

@Lougle be careful. It sounds like you are pushing your body too far. I really hit a wall physically a couple of years ago. Luckily have clawed my way back but better to slow down and look after yourself than get to crisis point.

Hello all. Just wanted to say a huge thank you for all the honks and support and especially the advice from (I think - given new usernames!) @scoopofmintchocchipicecream. The LA have agreed our preferred school for DD in advance of the appeal having opposed it strenuously for the last year. I can't quite believe it. There's some bickering still going on about the exact wordings of B and F but I'm much less worried about that than I was about the right placement.

Music exam done phew. And I sat outside which was a first and hopefully another step towards improving DDs confidence in doing these things. She was exhausted afterwards so not a lot else achieved today but she later told me she felt proud of what she had done. I’m hoping this will be enough to carry her onto the big exam in June.

Glad @RavenLaw you have the school names that you wanted. Hope the transition goes well.

@scoopofmintchocchipicecream a year of pilates saved my back by building a stronger core. I was reduced to using a walking stick for nearly a year at my worst lowest point and two years later ran a HM. I now get scared when I get twinges or pins / needles in my foot as it it’s disc nerve pain related but ice and gentle movement helps me reset. It’s horrid though and so so debilitating when in crisis. I hope you can find some way to release it. I had an old school GP pain specialist who used acupuncture needling on me and it did help.

Take care look @Lougle sounds like your body needs a rest too.

@RavenLaw Hurrah! Fantastic news. I am really pleased to read that.

@Lougle easier said than done, but please look after yourself.

1:1 can be provided in college. It would need to be in F, but it is possible. Though, like you say, if you want EOTIC, it doesn’t need challenging.

@FrostySunRun well done DD. An amazing achievement. So should be proud.

When I had an MRI, it found 3 herniated discs with some nerve involvement. There was also an incidental finding of a small cyst which didn’t need any treatment and some age-related changes that made me feel even older. I have a weak core too - pregnancies and sections saw to that. I really need to lose some weight. I know it would help. My problem is comfort eating.

@Zeonlywayisup yes, F is the special educational provision. The problem is, what ‘adult’? And what will they be ‘skilled’ in? What is their job title, training, qualifications and experience? Will it be a consistent, dedicated person or the same e.g. 2 or 3 people, or will it be whoever is free and change each day? ‘Trusted’ by who? Trusted adult isn’t the same as saying, for example, “Priority must always be given to those with whom X has an existing trusting relationship…” The former could mean trusted by the college. What is ‘working towards’? Will it be worked towards over a week, a term, a year, longer? What is a ‘small group’? Your definition will not be the same as the LA’s definition. It doesn’t say how long for or the frequency either. So is the 1:1 for 5 mins once a day or for the whole college day?

The only thing it does say is how often “daily” but yes I see what you mean. I don’t think they are sensible enough to care for him.

"1:1 can be provided in college. It would need to be in F, but it is possible. Though, like you say, if you want EOTIC, it doesn’t need challenging."

Yes, her current EHCP has a lot of 1:1 and she goes to a school that has 1:1 provision at all times now. But this college say they can't provide dedicated 1:1 support in class. The best they can do is shared TA support. I know they can do it, but word is that their rural location makes recruitment challenging and I get the impression they don't have the heart for it. Besides that, she won't cope with a class of 30, even if it is with 1:1 support.

I don't actually want EOTIC. I want her to be able to study her preferred subject in a group size she can cope with. But as that's realistically a group of 4 as long as she doesn't have to talk to the other 3, I can't see it going well.

Thank you all, as well. I do need to find some time to just be. I'm finding the sea glass hunting to be a little treat, because we hunt different areas of the beach and I can't do anything else because I'm 10 miles from home, so I get alone time. Post-op pup is trazadoned up so is very cuddly. I was forced to have a cuddle on the sofa this afternoon, so it's not all bad.

I was reading DD1's draft EP report today and I was asked to fact check the school/college history. Man, that poor girl! 9 years since she had a placement that met her needs. 5 years since she was admitted to hospital. 3 failed college placements, 3 failed social care placements. Still fighting the same fight.

It is hard reading in all in black and white.

a group of 4 as long as she doesn't have to talk to the other 3

This made me smile. It reminded me of the school DS3 drew and annotated for the EP when we were pursuing EOTIS for him. A school with no other pupils, certain types of staff, taught only certain subjects to a high academic level in certain ways with lots of sensory input, lots of exercise/sport, multiple therapies, sensory friendly building… you get the idea. It was never going to exist.

Aaaand it’s about this stage when I have this kind of discussion when someone suggests I “start my own school”. It is all a bit of a dead end isn’t it?

DD2 annotated a map of her old school for the EP. She marked different areas in red and wrote comments 'it's too noisy', 'I might see Mrs X', 'lots of kids', etc. Then there was one solitary, small green dot on the road outside the school. It said 'I'm going home and I feel safe'.

@RavenLaw oh I am so delighted for you all. Really enjoyed reading your news.

@FrostySunRun go DD she is doing so well. That’s a lot today. Really remarkable.

Thanks the adhd meds have provided a step change in what has been possible it’s been interesting to see the impact they have in quietening the noise in her head but equally reprogramming what she believes is possible in small manageable steps. Unfortunately I can’t control the hormonal cyclical impact but we do talk a lot about how they make her feel and her sister got her an app to track it which is now brining her self awareness of when she’s not feeling herself it could be that v jumping into anxiety spiral model straight away. Hope the last term of OU goes ok without too much procrastination and late nights @RedRegular

@scoopofmintchocchipicecream sorry to hear your back is also disc related as it’s not easy to help. I know it’s controversial for some but mounjaro helped me lose nearly 4st it’s had the same impact on me as I’ve seen the adhd meds on balancing my daughters mind. Completely cut the food noise. I’m convinced having a ND mind is 100% the reason I’ve struggled my whole life to keep my weight down despite exercising a lot & having a high awareness of nutrition.

@FrostySunRun what an achievement. Is there a big wait for results with music exams? The pressure of trying to be perfect in front of a stranger is intense, isn't it? A bit like a driving test, I guess?

FrostySunRun well done to your dd. Would being on the contraceptive pill help her with her cycle. Dd liked the predictability though she had to come off it due to reduced mobility.

RavenLaw great that you have the school you wanted. I hope you can get the rest sorted quickly.

Lougle such a long road you have been on.

@FrostySunRun that weight loss is brilliant. I have held off WLI because I’m not sure they will work for me. My problem is comfort eating rather than the food noise many who take them talk about. I haven’t seen/heard anyone mention it helps them with that.

@RavenLaw Congratulations on getting the placement you want!

We picked up DD1 last Saturday for a week at home. In the evening, sciatica came on - I can only assume it was the 7 hour drive there and back. I’ve just been to see an osteopath, who confirmed an inflammation to the right of my spine in the sciatic nerve. Anyway I’ve got another session booked for Tuesday. DH booked us a holiday in Greece for my birthday - the flight is on Wednesday. At the moment, I’m not sure I can go, as getting up, bending down and coughing is too painful. I certainly can’t see myself walking up the Acropolis on Thursday!

More shenigans with DD2 last night and today!

@FrostySunRun & @scoopofmintchocchipicecream funny that WLI has come up as I have just started them on advice from my GP. I comfort eat and panic eat (4 slices of toast in case I can’t eat later etc). I am still in the same habits but can no longer have 4 slices of toast as I’m full after 1. Certain things I can’t eat at all as they are just no longer appealing. I’m still managing a cocktail when I fancy one 🥂 but I’m too full to have a second. My pre-diabetes symptoms feel better already! But that might be a mind trick.