need to procrastinate today? make up your own SN limerick

[lingle]

"there once was a boy with propensities,
for problems linguistic and sensory
they said "hmm, autistic?"
his mum went ballistic
and brainstormed on mumsnet intensively

by lingle aged 39 and a half.

that one should be from Silverfrog judging by her recent posts!

There once was a school in the west
That liked to make out it was best
But although it excelled
My son got expelled
Because he didn't fit like the rest.

(I tried to fit in a line about the head being a tit so I meet need a second verse)

might need

There was a wee girlie in France
Who at schooltime just wanted to dance
And yet in her school
To sit is the rule
So really she hasn't a chance!

By Brio aged 36 and a few weeks.

it is definitely crying out for verse 2. A fine example of the genre, I feel.

These are fab!

I'll think about my own later, but am just going out, so will add later.

Fabluloso!!

Just what I need for the weekend - will attempt after a bit of thought!

Good one Brioche!

There was a young lady who knew
That her little boy needed the loo
but the dryers were frightening
his fears they were heightening
So how could the poor wee lad poo?

these are brilliant.

sadly, I am hopeless at limericks (dh is a whizz though, so might set him free on it later!)

"The Hearing Test" by lingle

I'm sure audiologists are bright
But why do they think it is right
to make complex demands
my son can't understand
then complain when he leaves in a fright?

They said 'it's just global delay,
His problems will soon go away!'
But 13 years later,
I'm such a doc hater,
For the lies that they told me that day.

A lovely young boy was autistic
His folks just weren't realistic
They expected assistance
but met with resisitance
And found he was just a statistic

This is strangely theraputic!

Two children in Wales were well known
For the things they had broken and thrown
Their Mum tried her best
But with with barely a rest
Found her humour had given way to a moan

A paediatrician in Gwent
To this poster had regularly lent
a diagnostic notebook
And a positive outlook
So much so that she soon did charge rent

You'd think that we might just get repsite
If we put up enought of a fight
But the social workers ignored us
Shook their heads and abhored us
And said that their funds were just too tight

The department of work and of pensions
I speak to with sheer apprehension
I know what i'm entitled to
But it seems in their view
that is a matter of some contention

seems that in their view

almost

A mother who was prone oft to whine
developed a liking for wine*
by the glass it was downed
as her sorrows were drowned
And her children all tied up with twine

Why? ytou think itd make the cut?

A mum whose senco was a liar
had a hard battle to acquire
some sanity and smiles
As she piled up her files
Into a pile that got higher and higher

This is fun