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Original poster

support thread for the going to be starting school or at school thread lol

291 replies

bubblagirl · 05/06/2009 19:15

thought maybe as there is a pre school thread maybe we could have a going to be starting school or at school thread all welcome really

but we are waiting for our re written proposed statement to turn up tomorrow hoping all is going to be as we need it this time

im really nervous and anxious about him starting school bubblaboy my 4 yr old with HFA for all who may not know me

he had induction today but his sound sensitivity was played up with singing time so may have to ask if he can sit outside of the group with support when he starts and introduced to it gradually as at the moment he dont like big school dont want to go and doesn't like the singing so would hate for that to be what ruins his joy of going to school every day

OP posts:
brokenspacebar · 19/08/2009 10:25

tiredm, we were the same with hair cuts, I was giving my ds slightly quirky hair cuts for two years, then he just turned some kind of psychological corner, dh took him to the hair dresser and ds was fine... amazing.

bubbla, I understand the nerves, ds is on his 2nd day in P1, he went in no bother today, such a relief, I think he is happier than he was in nursery atm - full days from the 31st, so `I am not getting too excited until we see how he copes with that. I still struggled to sleep last night, just the emotion of it all.

glittery that is great! my ds would struggle to leave a car with a dvd player!

glitteryb6 · 19/08/2009 11:35

ah well the dvd player went down well this morning.....he didnt even wave!

Original poster
bubblagirl · 19/08/2009 12:09

lol his well away now fantastic at least no lumps in throat he looks happy which in turn will make you relaxed and happy lol

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Shells · 19/08/2009 19:38

Oh I'm jealous of the haircutting. We've had years of terrible haircuts too. Maybe it will get better...

brokenspacebar · 19/08/2009 21:08

we dropped it into the conversation now and again shells, then it was as if it was auto suggestion, we'd mention it and he would say he was going to get his hair cut (maybe he just got sick of the length of time it took me to cut his hair, easily two hours over a week, and the mess I made lol).

Phoenix4725 · 20/08/2009 03:13

yes haircuts here took 6 months ofjust visting the barbers and a very patiant and nderstanding barber means s will now tolerate a quick trim but no clippers scisssors only.

We are just abut all ready for school now othe rthan trousers which due to ds being titch have given up on now.And still waiting to get ds some new boots but going hold fire till he has got his afos then order over spint boots so be no gym for ds anyway as he could not walk in pe pumps anway

sc13 · 20/08/2009 16:03

Small hijack for which I apologize but didn't want to start new thread - finally got the Ed Psych report on DS (3.4) at f/t m/s nursery. Skills apparently above his age, good. Happier around other kids than he was a few months ago, improving with turn-taking, good. But he still talks very little, and mostly communicates non-verbally.
At home he is quite talkative. Only this last week he finally started longer sentences, like 'I want a chocolate biscuit', and he is also saying 'DS is happy' and 'DS cries' (to mean he's sad) appropriately, without coaching on my part.
Why doesn't he talk more in nursery?? He likes his key worker, and knows the names of all the other kids. We're applying for a statement and all, but what could I do in the meanwhile, to get him to talk more to people other than us? Or am I just being too impatient, and he will do it eventually?

Original poster
bubblagirl · 20/08/2009 18:23

he will do it eventually talking around people your comfortable with is different to talking in large group ds took a yr to talk in nursery and even then it was with help its not comfortable you have to remember socially is where they are more affected with the right help they will start to respond but took ds a lot of one to one and help to talk more its more voices more commands and more to take in than the easy social setting of home its more confusing for them its good start to talk more at home so thats fab the rest will come in time

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sc13 · 21/08/2009 11:14

Thanks BBgirl, you're always so encouraging. I was a bit depressed yesterday - reading bad things in reports, even if you know and even if there are also good things in the same report, is always a bit yuk.

Original poster
bubblagirl · 21/08/2009 16:04

my ds was the same though spoke loads at home but in social wouldnt speak if it helps we have just been a play date with little boy ds hasnt seen since pre school broke up they wont be going to same school either and they played great he was talking when being spoken to i had to remind him to speak up but he did really well

this little boy also had a sister and she had a friend round they all sat at the table to eat together so it goes to show they can and will do it when there ready

i used to play games with ds as it wasnt he couldnt do it he just didnt know what to do sometimes in large social setting so we would play role play games of hello my name is x can i play with you

and also the greetings of what do we say when we meet someone "hello" now he happily says hello back when people say hello to him on bad days he'll turn his head away but because his sleeping there is not so many bad days

i like the talks very little ds on report says he whispers and can be very hard to hear at times lol so i just remind him to talk so people can hear and again when out i say speak up they cant hear you and he will

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sunfleurs · 22/08/2009 10:43

Oh can I join please? Ds has HFA, aged 6, is in mainstream and just going into Year 2. He has a statement for one to one and other support and the school make lots of allowances but I generally get called in to offer support at least twice a week, often more if a bad week. I have offered this and am happy to do it but I can't tell you the daily stress of waiting for the phone to ring.

I thought I would really enjoy the school holidays and I have enjoyed having ds at home but I have had horrible panic attacks throughout. My doctor thinks that it is a reaction to the constant stress I feel under when ds is at school, I am relaxed because of school holidays so my body is trying to off load the stress now, great!

Would be great to have a place to discuss the daily trials of having a HFA child in mainstream.

Original poster
bubblagirl · 22/08/2009 12:10

your more than welcome to join my ds is 4.3 and starts ms school sept he has HFA and im so nervous about him starting he wont have any one to one so im hoping they will support him fully still

hope you feel better soon stress is terrible you can offload here {{{{big hugs}}}}

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Original poster
bubblagirl · 27/08/2009 11:42

i'm going on holiday on sat will be back on the 5th ds starts school the 10th but i know a lot start next week so want to wish all that do start next week lots of luck i wont have internet access so cant check in until i get home so huge hugs to the ones starting and huge glass of wine for the mums i'll be thinking of you all and will check in when i get back xx

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tiredmummyoftwo · 27/08/2009 14:14

Have a good holiday.

Original poster
bubblagirl · 27/08/2009 15:39

thank you

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Phoenix4725 · 27/08/2009 18:43

enjoy yourholiday bubblagirl you earnt it , sorry cant come up but ds is still on grupmy side and want him well rested got take to dorset tuesday and school Thursday

Going need that crate bottles of wine

boolifooli · 27/08/2009 19:01

Sorry to jump in so late. DS, just 3, is starting mainstream nursery in 3 weeks. He has 2 issues. Firstly his walking is poor. He had a neurological illness last year and he didn't walk for months and although he can walk again now, progress is very slow. He's by no means as sturdy or as speedy as his peer group and gets very upset when other children bump into him. Secondly he's just off the charts for size and is clearly much smaller than most of the children he will be with. We are about to undergo blood tests for a possible gluten intolerance and lack of growth hormone etc. The LEA's Early Years Special Needs lady has done a risk assesment at on his behalf and feels they are very able to provide the environment he needs. He has been at a private nursery since October last year run by a lady with extensive experience with children with additional needs so I feel almost guilty moving him from the cosy position he is in now but feel if we don't make the jump now when do we? I have got very close to calling the mainstream nursery off and keeping him where he is. I want to stay with him for the first few days! I would probably feel like this anyway as he is my youngest. How do I deal with the constant barage of 'he's so small' from the other parents. It won't be as bad as I worry, will it?

Phoenix4725 · 27/08/2009 20:44

is it local to you Ds was like this looked like baby into nursery , he now going to look like a toddler loose in school but found people soon got used to it and kids not even noticed.Ds struggles to walk , no seech andhas GDd but i can remeber how nervours I was when he went

Have you seen senco and will ds be getting any help

Phoenix4725 · 27/08/2009 20:46

oh and should said first sory
hello and welcome jump in anytime

boolifooli · 29/08/2009 13:29

Hi Phoenix

yes, it is right at the top of my street and the one we are at now is a 10 minute drive so it would be handier for him to be there. Yes people will think he is starting much younger because he walks like a 1 year old and is not much bigger than a 1 year old too. I think you're right, after the first few days of funny looks he will just blend in. It's just that I've been thrown into the special needs thing without warning (haven't we all!) and am still trying to get used to the attention you get when out and about.

thank you for the warm walcome

Phoenix4725 · 31/08/2009 08:29

yeah the kids seem to cope bette rthan us .Yep think its the shock thing i am only just getting grip on it and i known longe rthn it took me to convince the 8proffesionals

ok, i am feeling sick with nerves and worry on how ds is going to cope on Thursday heaven knows what I am going to be like by day .Think is worry his Lsa is pretty new and has bever worked with a child that has Ld and major language issues .

Schools having makton training tomorrow ready and if can get sitter and persuead head to let me would like to attend so least i know if they are missing anything.but she has no pecs traing nothing and been old by another that she will need her confidence building to help ds .guess whos job that going to be

madwomanintheattic · 31/08/2009 18:33

hello! haven't been on this thread as thought it was just for newbies, but realised i could pop in!

dd2 started her new school today in grade 1 (she did yr r last year at a fabulous school and had full time 1-1). she has athetoid cp, but is (mostly) a walker and talker.

we just moved (o'seas) and they couldn't set up her support until we arrived, but the school assure me that everything will be fine and they can manage until she is assessed here and funding is through for her support.

so, i am slightly terriferied. she has already been subject to 'i can't understand what she says, why does she speak like that?' from another girl who will be in her class which i think we got past. (although i was less than convinced by the 'oh! i understood that! she said...' two minutes later.... and when we got to school i found a huge set of steps at the elementary entrance (it's a level access school lol... but obviously through the main entrance...)

panic panic, flap. flap. three and a half hours until pick up...

someone tell me it will be ok?

debs40 · 31/08/2009 18:53

Hi

I thought this was a school starter thread too.

I've been posting about DS who is going through the ASD assessment process at the moment. He has possible AS but certainly has social communication difficulties of some sort.

School have just started to accomodate it. He is 6 and changed school in the middle of the last academic year. He manages well academically so his other issues can get overlooked. But they are largely routine/sensory based and I dread changes of routine, coats, shoes, and I really hate PE!

School have said they will talk to the ed psych this year but that he may just need support at particular times like start/end of year.

He likes school but I know he's going to be so distressed going back and I hate the thought of the first day with new teachers with me trying to encourage him to go into class and other parents staring at me

I know he'll be ok once he's in to the swing of things

Phoenix4725 · 31/08/2009 20:11

yeah thats same problem in juniors here its level acces one way only mindhave 3 years to work on them chaging that before Ds goes.hope today went well madwomanintheatic

I am bundleof nervers really am someone get wine ready nd mean crates of by Thursday

Nope ist a everything goes especially those in first few years of school

madwomanintheattic · 01/09/2009 19:48

so yesterday went well and dd2 had a lovely day

today, though, they have a military band coming in to do a concert... i'm guessing it may be step too far for noise-phobic dd2, but i'm keeping my fingers crossed.

she didn't fall down the steps () and this morning the same TA as yesterday appeared to help her in with her things, so hopefully they are all getting used to each other.

the mum of the girl she has been given a desk next to her stopped me and asked a few questions last night (her daughter had asked her), so hopefully word will go round fairly quickly and people will be happy to treat her like any of the other kids, and ask me stuff if they want to. i just never know whether to go all 'this is x and she has y' or to leave it until they ask...

ah well, so far so good!

good luck for next week ladies!