Can we carry on talking about MNSN til we get a Chat Thread sorted out?

[EllenJaneisstillnotmyname]

Just wanted to link to this before the other thread got full.

I'm getting a bit worried now.

Am I right in thinking the Goose and Carrot is a sort-of pub, based in a portacabin, which serves and homemade cake and is in Amsterdam....

MareeyaDolores, you have just described the student union bar at my old college (if you throw in some dodgy lighting, and a few whey faced Goth boys)

...oh hang on, that makes it sound as though I went to college on Amsterdam (which would be far too exotic)

Ooh I think the Goose and Carrot is a great idea! A sort of drop-in kind of coffee/tea room/wine bar/pub? Can't imagine anything nicer! Like others, I don't often get to the Friday night threads so a drop-in one would be lovely imo.

Can see the hitch if people want to discuss things under the search radar, but perhaps these specific things could be kept to OTBT (as before)?

It's been really nice that so many people are on this thread and the one before who might not normally chat together.

Thank you silverfrog for starting it all

Late to the thread.

Star, congratulations on the house.

Hothead, that's the hardest thing for me about SN. That the 'solutions' and 'support' always involve the child with SN being isolated from the rest of the family. I highlighted this to a senior SW at a parents meeting last week. I don't want DD1 always taken away. I don't want her to do fun things with someone else so I get a break. What I need is opportunities to have her cared for, but also opportunities for someone else to give DD2 and DD3 a fun time while I give DD1 some attention, etc., so that no-one gets the message that DD1 isn't part of it all.

I have had a truly scummy day. DD1 spent the early morning telling me to 'shut up, idiot' whenever I asked her to do something. I wrote in her book and said it's wearing a bit thin. She was put on the cloud once at school, which was very helpful because she cares what they think far more than what I think!

DD3 has been abysmal today. I don't know what's got into her. She's 4 next month and her behaviour has become so incredibly controlling. Today she refused to put her coat on (it's bitter outside, so no option) and rolled around the floor. She refused to get in the car and bucked and writhed in the seat, then stretched the seat belt out as far as it would go - so unsafe.

At the school, waiting for DD2, she hit me, pinched me repeatedly, threw sand, knocked someone's scooter over....the list goes on. I ended up holding her, with her kicking me and trying to pinch me. Then, once DD2 was out of school she repeatedly dropped herself to the floor, refusing to walk. Same stuff with the car...awful. The reason? I had told her we couldn't go along the stoney path to school because of the weather, so we had to use the pavement .

I'm praying it's just a perfectly normal phase.

I wanted some respite from my kids so I could spend some quality time with the disabled one.

ha ha ha, - not a chance.

Apparrently all they can offer (if they ever get that far) will be someone to take the disabled child off our hands so I can spend time with my other children (the one in nursery part time and the baby who I see loads of), when what I ACTUALLY want is time to implement the extensive training that I have received myself in supporting the child with the disability.

Grrrrrrr

Well I've made a case to the SW I spoke to that I want to be able to:

Spend time with all 3 girls together with support
Spend time with DD1 knowing that the other two are ok
Spend time with the other two knowing that DD1 is ok.

I'm waiting for a verdict.

Star, if they send someone to the (new ) house, it's highly unlikely that they'll insist the girls stay away while they're playing with ds1....

And if theyre still playing but he then pops out to the trampoline for a little social skills session with his mum, no-one would care.

Just get your direct payments sorted, then worry about the logistics

lougle my dd (nt) is coming up to 3 and 1/2 and while lovely most of the time, can be a massive pita. Usually about getting dressed/cleaning teeth - in the last two weeks we have got as far as the garden gate with her in just pants/pyjamas before she gives in and realises being cold outweighs 'winning' the battle

star congrats on the house! Know exactly what you mean about the concept of 'respite'. I don't want someone to come along and take ds off my hands either - I want someone to come and show us how to deal with the problems that affect our life as a family (which is why I continue to pay ABA tutors).

Okay, finally tracked the new thread down. Liking the idea of a chatty ongoing thread (bit like the nobdies or quiche ones?) But I loathe carrots, holland and honking. So maybe not too much emphasis on that or it may get a bit exclusive i will hate it . Weird times here. Get the whole privacy thing too. Would love to post about ds at the moment, but feel slightly paranoid about someone recognising me!

justa, you sound about as close to the end of your tether as I am mine!

bialystocking, thanks for that encouragement. I felt like a prize twit standing there in the freezing cold with a (tall for age) almost 4 year old in my arms, squirming like a...squirmy thing.

Lougle, Justa and Hot - sounds trying fo all of you.

Perhaps not as all consuming but Dd threw a chair across the room today

See, that's an encouragement to me. Just to hear that other children of similar ages are also having 'episodes' makes me feel like I'm not so terrible. I think I have images in my head of every other child being wonderful and mine being terribly behaved because she has me as a parent!

The thing is Lougle. I MET your children. They were adorable!

Meant to add, that clearly our kids can behave very differently when at home and so so can everyone else's!

Oh Yes, DD3 saves the very best for Mummy She's an angel at preschool

Dd has mastered the 'slippery arm' manouvre (ds was also champion at that), when you try and pick her up under the arms, suddenly her shoulders come out of their sockets She's big for her age, and weighs a ton too, so when she refuses to do something/get dressed/leave the house I can't even pick her up and frogmarch her. Sigh.

Sorry Star but laughing a little bit at thought of your dd throwing a chair