Misguided Illusion Part II - Baby still not sleeping through by six months? Come and join us!

[MomOrMum]

Thought I would start a fresh thread as, sadly, we have almost filled the first one.

Feral, Kiwi, Chulita, et al...shouldn't we have graduated from this thread by now?!

Now welcoming a new crop of 6 months+ babies determined to help us reach new heights/depths of sleep deprivation.

Here is the original thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/sleep/713951-Support-thread-for-those-who-were-under-the-misguided-illusion

Big yays for babies Bicnod and herb!!

Hi there Poppet, MrsVidic and dawntigga. How is baby Poppet now?

R behaved himself for the babysitter thank goodness. Twas my latest night out since having him, we went for some celebratory posh nosh. I heard some murmurs when we came in at (drum roll) 2am but all quietened down and he woke up chatting at 7:30!!! Cue rock hard, Dolly style cleavage. I can find no rhyme or reason to this sleeping lark...

Yay for BellamyBaby! Last night DD woke at 11:20pm and 4:20am. She then woke for the day at 6:30am, however, we brought her into bed and we all dozed until about 7:30ish.

I had to chuckle today - we went out for lunch today to an all you can eat chinese buffet. We gave DD a pot of chicken, veg and rice food, she then proceeded to munch her way through 4 big chips, a large lump of omelette and cheese, and then some icecream. Bearing in mind she looks much younger than she is (she's 9 months, should be 6 months, but looks about 3 months), we had some very interesting looks! Hopefully it'll make her sleep well though.

Oh goodness everyone's so lovely on this thread waves blearily

Baby Poppet had an okay night - by which I mean fairly crappy but we've had worse during this bug - up at 10.30, 1-2am 3am and I think just before six - and then fed until 7 when I handed him over to Mr Poppet and crawled back to bed.

He's just finished his antibiotics but still isn't totally better so I guess we'll see how tonight goes, he missed one of his naps today and had an epi in his pushchair for 30 minutes - was awful - really wished I had a car and could just whisk him home

Totally agree that we're not doing any sleep training right now, and not until I'm 100 per cent happy that he's well again, but when we do I guess I'll see what works: have never tried pick up put down, and suppose at some stage Mr Poppet will have to help me end the night feeds, I have cc in the back of my head as a last resort - but think I'd have to spend some nonexistant savings on a night nanny as I don't have the stomach for it. But then is it worse if it's not his mummy doing it?? Argh, awful dilemma.

I guess we'll try him on solids soon and then take it from there. I did let him try the banana test today and apart from his appalled expression Baby Poppet was a dab hand at trying to feed himself so I guess he's just about ready, not sure if I am!

So glad to hear the end is in sight for many - Bicnod what's in your plan - it seems to be working touches wood In particular how are you soothing in the cot? We have to walk round the room alot but I'd prefer not to have to take Poppet jnr out of the cot unless I absolutely have to.

Anyway here's wishing some lovely, magic, fairy, sleepy dust for all the babies on this thread.

BB - I am in awe at your stamina. We regard 11pm as very late indeed in the IsItMeHousehold. Hope you enjoyed your posh nosh - sounds lovely (sigh).

Galena - that does sound like a sight to be seen. Also sounds like a very strange chinese buffet .

Here's hoping everybody has a good night tonight. Our chief hope for tonight is that we don't have a leaky diarrhea-filled nappy. We have clean everything on standby just in case!

BB - amazing I can't remember the last time I was out beyond 10pm - did the babysitter put babyBB to bed or did you? We've never left O in the evening yes I know, I know, pfb etc etc blah blah blah - I just can't (said in whingy way)

Galena - your baby is becoming a super sleeper - that's so fantastic and gives me hope!

Poppet - O used to be the same in his pushchair and now I have taken to carrying a sling with me everywhere (this one - which is very comfy considering he's now nearly 2 stone!) just in case...

So we're just starting day 8 of The Plan. Last night was amazing. He went down at 18.30, woke at 22.30 (needed picking up) and again at 23.00 (needed picking up), then slept through until 05.40!!!! So only two wake ups. Sadly he decided to start his day at 05.40 so going to try and put him to bed 15 minutes later tonight and see if that helps. But it seems that the plan is slowly slowly working.

Poppet, The Plan is based on pages 144-150 of The No Cry Sleep Solution - it is basically a gradual withdrawal method as baby O had always been picked up and cuddled, rocked, sung back to sleep and then put down in his cot. So the first step was to put him down when he was falling asleep and then shush him to sleep in his cot (with hand on him), second step to put him down while sleepy but not falling asleep, third step to not pick him up when settling in night but comfort him in cot, fourth step to not touch him while in cot, fifth step to not enter room. With all of the above if he starts getting upset you just go back to the previous stage(s) as necessary to settle him. We are somewhere between stage 2 and stage 3 - at the moment we aim to not pick him up but more often than not we end up having to. When I manage to soothe him in the cot what works is putting both hands on him, kissing his forehead, keeping my face really close to his and saying shhhh shhhh, then removing a hand, moving further away when he's calmer. Its definitely not a book of quick solutions but I know I can't do CC/CIO and I also know I can't go back to work with the current levels of sleep deprivation so definitely worth a try! Hope that's helpful - maybe see if you can get hold of a copy of the book? There are solutions for lots of different sleep issues in there...

How was everyone's night last night?

Tigs - how's the Cub?

x

Well done BabyBicnod (You know, I'm quite happy to refer to DD (Skye) by name, it seems somehow more personal, but if anyone prefers to stay anonymous, that's also fine by me...)! Sounds like you're getting somewhere. That was a 6hr 40min stretch of unbroken sleep!

I hope BabyIsItMe managed not to explode last night and that the changes were unnecessary.

Skye slept from 6:30pm till 2:20am then slept until 7:30am. Half an hour in the big bed made for quite a respectable getting up time (I find bringing her in with us for a while just allows me to come round gently). Tonight she was put down fully awake for the first time in a long time (Usually I feed her to sleep and she stirs vaguely as I put her down, but she's pretty much asleep.). Tonight she was fussing as I fed her - coming on and off and on and off, so I put her down in her cot. No complaints. No crying. Just went off to sleep. (Hmmm, I shouldn't have typed that... after 20 minutes we just had a minimal cry. Maybe it's gone quiet again though...)

Here's hoping we all see improvements.

Thanks Galena - no explosions last night, although had some very runny incidents today. DS seemed a lot better today than yesterday, so hoping he'll be on the mend soon. He just woke a couple of times to be fed, and then went back to sleep. DH managed to persuade him to go back to sleep when he woke at 6ish, and then got up with him just before 7 and let me have a lie-in (well, until 7.50. I was needed to help with nappy!).

Sounds like Skye did very well last night! Hope she does as well tonight for you. At this rate, we might need a graduation ceremony for a few people soon.

Can't work out whether to shout this from the rooftops or keep very quiet so as not to jinx it...

Skye went to bed at 18:30, woke at 23:00 and fed, then woke at 07:00!!!!!!!!

I hope IsItMeBaby continues to feel better.

Morning all.

Bicnod I fed R and put him to bed. It was all a bit of an 'Operation get out of the house on time'. Babysitter did a dreamfeed with bottle at 10ish. He is still fine with strangers which is good as he has never met her in real awake life. I don't think anyone apart from me has ever put him to bed, something we have to rectify soon. I just saw your link to the carrier, it looks fab. We have a bjorn but he is really too heavy for it now. I always carry it with me on the buggy too, just in case of melt downs.

Poppet, our chap could be a real pickle in the pushchair too, it is horrible, so stressful. DS actually dropped milk feeds pretty easily when the time came. I left DP with the baby monitor and slept in another room and actually he managed to settle him quite easily.

Galena that is fab, fab, fab. Very sweet with the food as well and Skye is such a pretty name.

IsItMe-How's DS's tum today?

Galena - Yay, yay and thrice yay! That sounds blissful. Hope you managed to sleep too.

IsItMeBaby had a leaky nappy just after 6 today, and has had a couple more since, so he's still struggling. Hardly eaten anything all weekend, but at least he's feeding from me, so that should keep him going.

Galena that is fantastic yay for Skye

My little bundle of fun is called Oscar - he didn't have quite such a good night last night but still think we're heading in the right direction. Today is day 9 of The Plan and last night went like this: bed 18.45, needed to be picked up to bet settled at 21.30, quick settle at 02.05 (just hand on chest and shhhhhh), awake for day at 05.40. So still improving but think we need to try harder to settle him back to sleep in the early hours as don't really want to be starting my day at 05.40

He's definitely getting there. And his daytime naps are much better now as well - one in the morning and a longer one after lunch pretty much every day.

IsItMe - O had tummy trouble for a couple of weeks and kept doing early morning poos (sometimes at 3am) - usually pretty explosive involving a full change of clothes. Nightmare. Hope your little one gets better soon.

hello all,

Well My DD's sleep has got progressivley worse Sat night- she slept from 6-12 then refused to go in her cot so slept in my bed and kept waking. I thought she was ill but the doc's checked her and she's fine.

Last night slept until 12 again and then wanted to come into my bed- she's really not like this usually.

I am so tired- she's waking hourly now its really affecting me. I drove over an hour this morning to take my DP to work and when arrived realised I'd not strapped her car seat in ! I don't think I will ever forgive myself for that. She's fine though. I have lost 1/2 a stone since thursday with all the exhaustion/ stress. I am being pathetic I know.

I've seen the health visitor today who advised me to pick her up soothe her then put her back in the cot and let her cry for a few mins and go back. I have done this at 1pm today for her lunch nap and it worked- she slept when I went to settle her after 2 mins of crying (which is more annoyance not really distressed crying IYSWIM)

Fingers crossed she settles so easily through the night- as I am NOT letting her in our bed again

Hello there. I haven't been on this thread for months, just popped by to see if I recognise anyone..!

Feral, Chulita are you out there?

I'd like to say that at 13 1/2 months DD is a transformed baby who sleeps through the night, but, err, that would be a lie. She did sleep through the night. Once. Once, in 13 1/2 months. Hey ho, she's not too bad generally I suppose, on a good night she just wakes once for a feed and goes back to sleep though recently she's been terrible but I think that's teething. Though I always think that and she's still only got 2 teeth

Well, good luck everyone!

Just wanted to give some sympathy to you MrsVidic. It WILL get better. Don't beat yourself up about the seat belt, it's one of those things you will never, ever do again. I remember clearly having a few nights like that, the fatigue is hideous. Can DP spend a night looking after her, perhaps go to bed at the same time as her, then have a couple of set times when if she wakes DP can bring her into you for a feed, but he settles her (as suggested by HV) after feeds and at all other times? If he is working then maybe at the weekend for a couple of nights. I did this for a couple of nights, I put some ear plugs in as well. Good luck, I am really hoping you have a better night.

KiwiPanda-come on pandababy you are supposed to be setting an example for our DCs.

Bicnod -I think Oscar's night sounds fab. 5:40 is sooooo nearly 6:00, which is officially morning in our household! Did he feed at all? When Rannie wakes for the day at that time, he will often go down really easily at nineish for an hour and I nap/watch crap tv/eat energy giving chocolate!

IsItMe- Sending formed stool thoughts to babyIIM.

I have spent way too much time on the computer today!

Have been offline as have had the nasty winter vomiting bug. In bed all weekend with DH and lovely sister taking care of babies; I just bf when required and then ran for the bathroom again.

Hoped that the babies wouldn't get it, but then up at 2am this morning for DT1 who was crying, discovered DT2 had been sick in her sleep and not even disturbed Woke her up and changed her and the bed and bless her she settled back down to sleep and slept until 5.30. She has had only one dirty nappy today (although that was frightful requiring a bath and scrubbing the carpet...) so seems to have it less badly than me, and DT1 seems fine so far so keep your fingers crossed for me.

I've been bf frequently through the night whenever they wake because my milk production has been low and I've had to supplement with formula at bedtime. Hopefully we can get back to where we were when we are all better. Actually though, last night wasn't that bad with a feed at 11/12 and then at 5.30; both went back to sleep after the 2am disturbance without a feed.

Had a skim through, good to hear some good news and welcome to the newbies. very jealous of the late night out. The DTs used to sleep from 7pm unti at least 1am so I had got used to going out when I wanted to and since they've often woken at 10pm since 6mo I've missed it

1stMrsF Poor you! That sounds horrendous. I dread getting really ill and still having to see to DS. Sounds like you have a fab sister.

Thanks BB - nothing stool-wise since lunchtime, which I'm hoping is a good sign.

MrsVidic - so sorry you're having such an awful time. I know what you mean about the hourly wakes leading to total brain-numbing fatigue. You look normal, but you're just nowhere close. There are some unhelpfully placed pedestrian lights at a set of traffic lights on my way home, and one day I just set off when they turned green (the pedestrian ones, that is) and then looked confused at the cars pulling out from the junction towards me. I did stop in time, thankfully and figured out what must have happened. Try not to be too hard on yourself, and try to avoid driving when you're really bad.

Really hope the HV's plan works for you tonight. Remember that it takes 3-4 days for little ones to form a new sleep habit, so do persevere. It will be worth it!

1stMrsF, I'm sorry you've been poorly, but fab that you have a sister who could help you out!

IsItMe, here's hoping your son is over the worst.

MrsVidic, I hope you got better sleep last night. I don't know what sort of carseat you've got, but ours has a base which stays in the car and when you put the seat in you then have to put the seatbelt round the back. I've forgotten the belt a number of times now, but know that the base should hold it securely enough for most collisions.

Skye woke at 12 last night, fed, whinged for about 30secs when put bck in cot, then slept till 7:30! However, I woke at 4 and 6! Bah!

MrsV you poor thing how was last night? Really don't beat yourself up about the car seat, as BB says you will never ever do it again and there is nothing you can do to change what has happened. Hope last night was better. Does your DH get up with your LO as well?

Kiwipanda - how was pandababy's night last night?

BB - 6.30am is what I'm aiming for, but you're right 5.40am ain't bad!

MrsF - poor you DH had norovirus recently but O and I managed to avoid catching it (poor DH was quarantined - only allowed in our bedroom and the bathroom, and I was bleaching everything/washing clothes at 60/washing hands after everything etc). Keeping fingers and toes crossed that your DTs don't get it.

IsIt - how was last night?

So we're now day 10 of The Plan. Last night was a bit odd - O went down at 19.00, settle (no pick up) at 19.45, settle (no pick up) at 21.10, settle (no pick up) at 23.00, settle (had to pick him up) at 00.15, settle (no pick up) at 01.35 - then slept until 06.50!!! He squeaked a bit at around 3am but settled himself. So only one pick up, but 5 settles after bedtime. I think it was either cold or teething. Hmm. But so glad we've avoided another 5.40am wake up as I was scared it was becoming a habit.

I feel like we're getting there but still a long way to go before he's sleeping through.

Galena x-posts (I've been composing mine since 8.30am - slightly distracted!) - Skye is doing so well... she is giving me hope that O will start sleeping properly at some point. It's SO annoying when you wake up when they don't isn't it. Grrrrrrrr!

Galena I think we might have to drum you off the thread if Skye keeps this up . Although, I guess you can stay until you're sleeping through...? What a pain!

Bicnod It does sound as if The Plan might be working - not having to get O out of his cot other than the once is a big achievement. And hope you managed to make the most of that 5 hour stretch.

Poor IsItMeBaby (Alex) had a bit of a relapse in the night. He seemed to be doing much better yesterday afternoon - no dirty nappy at bathtime, just a nice wet one. A quick feed and resettle around 11pm. But then...

Poor thing had two major incidents when he woke at 3ish and I tried to feed him. I noticed the first one happening - managed to avoid a change of clothing - feeling very smug as started to feed him again. Another poo. Opened his sleeping bag to check and put my hand in it . Had to change him completely and put into clean sleeping bag. Back in his room to try feeding again. Poor little thing is sick all over both of us. Complete change for both of us, and by now we're onto the summer weight sleeping bags. Took his temperature and it was too low to register on the thermometer. I had no idea what this meant, so phoned NHS Direct. But as we kept taking his temp (cuddling him at the same time), it came back up gradually. So think this is not a huge problem .

Anyway, he went back to sleep again 4.30am, woke at 5.20am and DH was able to coax him back to sleep until 6.30am.

Poor little chap is very clingy this morning, although he managed a good breakfast. Here's hoping it clears up very soon, or I gather we'll need to go to see GP to get him checked out.

Sorry for all the detail ladies, it just makes me feel a bit better to make sure somebody else knows the full horror!

DH let me have a lie in while he gave A brekkie, so I'm feeling okay. Poor DH only got 20mins sleep after 3.30, as he couldn't get off to sleep when I sent him back to bed.

Sorry for the long post

1stMrsF So sorry you have been unwell. I have not yet been really ill with Ran and actually don't know how we would cope. Boo hiss on lack of nights out for you, at least you don't have to suffer the hangover/baby combo!

IsItMe You poor things. You must all be feeling rubbish. It always makes you feel a bit edgy when they are really unwell. It's good that Alex has an appetite and is feeding. I hope he has a good nap today and everything crossed that the worst is over.

Bicnod Thrilled on your behalf at Oscar's 6:50 wake up. R woke up consistently just before 6:00 from when he was tiny until quite recently, I had resigned myself to a life mainlining caffeine.

Galena Go that girl Skye!! Are you waking because you anticipate that she will?

MrsV Are you ok?

Awww, don't kick me off! I like it here.

IsItMe, I feel for you last night. Sounds grim for all 3 of you! I hate it when you discover leakage by hand! Apparently low temp can be as much a sign of illness as high temp, so if he's not better in the next day or two it's probably worth getting him checked over by a GP - They tend not to mind checking out little ones.

Bicnod, glad to hear there is some progress in the right direction! Certainly managing to keep him in his cot seems a good step forward. Here's hoping the plan continues onward!

Aw Galena I was only teasing. It is great to have your positive stories about how well Skye-baby is doing.

I phoned NHS Direct because of the low temp, and they weren't worried as he wasn't blue and the temp had come up again. But they said we should get GP to check him out if the D&V lasted for 5 days. So we'll see what tonight holds, and will ring up for an appointment in the morning if needs be.

Little one has been "fine" all day (if by "fine" we mean no puking or pooing incidents - he's hardly eaten anything and been really sad). But was similar yesterday until it all kicked off in the early hours.

Hope everybody else's littlies are doing well and that the sleep fairy is kind.

IsItMe your poor little boy! Hopefully last night was uneventful, and he's now on the mend?

As for us... Hmmm, 2:30 and 6:30. Unfortunately, I couldn't get back to sleep after the 2:30 wake until about 6! At 2 I heard her yell, then it all went quiet. 5 minutes later, same again. Then a 4 minute gap, then 3, etc. I was hoping she'd make it through without a feed at all. How wrong I was! At 2:30 I gave up and went and fed her. She was on for ages, and then when I put her down again, she yelled. I closed the door and went back to bed and she stopped yelling immediately, however, she started chatting to herself. From 3 till about 3:45, by which point I was awake and she fell asleep! Bah!