My baby is 11 months and never has slept through the night....

[Amani]

DD2 is nearly 11 months and still does not sleep through the night. She is a very fussy eater (may be that's the reason). Anyhow I put her to sleep around 8pm, then she wakes every 2-2.5 hrs - just for me to pat her back to sleep - then she goes back to sleep and then around 3-4am ish for a feed.

Is there anyone else out there in whose baby has never slept through the night? I've tried controlled crying, but I just dont have the heart to hear her crying for ages (plus I am working and all I think about in the middle of the night is the easiest option to get her to sleep again i.e milk/patting)

12 months before dd slept through, but is still disasterous if ill. we do milk. fastest way to get back into bed. and as i take a drink to bed and am only there for 8 hours i dont think its too unreasonable to want a drink if shes in bed for 12 hours.

DS 18 months still wakes 6 or 7 times. Sometimes he settles with BF, sometimes with a bottle from DH, and we have an air-mattress in DD's room which one or both of us will sometimes escape to.

Musical Beds is killing us, but DH catches a few winks in the evenings and the only predictable thing about DS's sleep pattern is his daytime nap. I'd be more of a maniac without it!

Good luck, Amani, and that was a reassuring post too, Greenmonkies

Currently doing controlled crying with my ds who's 9 months. working a treat I have to say !

Thank you guys especially those of you who came from teh Dec 07 and Jan 08 thread. Part of the reason why I did leave the thread is because I was comparing myself to a lot of you guys who had seemingly 'good' babies who slept well at night and ate well and it was making me feel like I hadn't got a grip on thing.

For me it's a miracle if DD2 eats more than 3 spoons at each meal (maybe that's why she doesn't sleep well at night. Although I took her to the dietician and she mentioned that it was to do with her teething that she wasn't eating - but that's been dragging on for 4 months now...)

Well, am going to considet CC even though I'm not 100% for it - something has to give I suppose especially since I am working, am fed up of coming in every morning feeling like I've been hit over the head and ready to konck out...

Oh no Amani, please don't feel like that

Sounds like DD2 is a lot like my DD was, not eating, not sleeping etc. DS eats but still doesn't sleep! And he still cries A LOT!

If it is an indication of parenting then I must be a really shitty one and I refuse to believe that

My dd was a v fussy eater (still is) and didn't sleep thro until she was 3. terrible piercing screams suddenly in the middle of the night. Frankly it's a miracle she made it to 3.

I was up four times last night with DS2 aged 21 months. He has slept through the night precisely twice in his life.
I have tried everything. Controlled crying, which worked for DS1 in three days, does not work with DS2. He is still screaming for two to three hours after two weeks of trying. We have tried several times. We once tried for three weeks - to no avail. Now I just give in and give him milk whenever he wakes up. Result, of course, is he eats practically nothing all day and then is up again all night for milk. He is obsessed with milk. Is a bad cycle, but my dh is away all week and I just can't survive the battling to get him to sleep through the night. At the end of the day, you have to do whatever it takes to get all of you as much rest as possible.
I am hoping he just grows out of it eventually.

Well if I go by the average stats from this thread I expect my DD to start sleeping through at around 2.10 yrs - hmm another year of sleepless nights then...

Thanks clairy, might venture back soon...

Amani - my DS has slept through the night exactly once.
He goes to bed at 7.30, and typical wakes anywhere between 2-3 times a night. He then wakes up for the day at around 5-5.30, though if I am lucky he'll feed and go down again until about 6.30-7am.
I've also tried CC a bit but he can cry for longer than I am prepared to leave him!
I am totally the same with regarding just feeding him and putting him down again being the quickest option. But it is bloody knackering, especially as I am working full time.
Was wondering where you'd gone, please come back!
Ds is a good eater at nursery not so good when he is home with me but getting better but it has made no difference to his sleep!

hi amani - please come and see us in Dec 07 - we miss you!!

Another non-sleeper here too. DS has slept through maybe 5 times but not for months. Our routine is that DH rocks him back to sleep if he wakes before 2am and then I feed him if he wakes up after that and usually leave him in our bed as he is much more settled there. I am just resigned to it now and that has made it much less painful. Having DH help out makes it easier too (a recent development) - does your DH get up too or do you do it all yourself? Sharing the burden will mean you are a bit less knackered.

Good luck with the CC if that's what you decide to do. I think you have to be really really determined if you are going to do it and absolutely not change your mind halfway through.

Let us know how you get on x

AMani - you felt like that. Please come back and chat!

TBH honest, I really didn't find CC a nighmare. I found it a lot easier on everyone. She hardly cries at all now - only if she wakes in the middle of the night and she was crying much more when we were rocking her etc.

Hi Amani, do come back, we miss you.

This worked for us www.amazon.co.uk/Solve-Your-Childs-Sleep-Problems/dp/1405319674/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=12264 24334&sr=8-1 . It helped DS start sleeping through. I know it isn't for everyone, but we were desperate. DS still wakes up once most nights, but usually only for his dummy.

Ds's sleep is just awful at the moment.

Last night is basically what we've be having for the past few nights.

7pm - ds goes to bed. He then stirs lots, cries out in his sleep. We do check on him if the cries are prolonged.
10:30pm - wakes up and the only way to settle him again is to feed him. He then proceeds to wake up several times and either Dh and I have to go in and settle him but eventually he sleeps.
Midnight - he wakes up again. Only this time will not settle, as soon as I put him in his cot he wakes up crying. So at 1am put him in bed with us and he sleeps.
3am - he wakes up wanting to feed. He latches on, sucks 3-4 times, pulls off sticks his dummy in his mouth, sucks it a few times, spits it out, cries until help him latch on again. He repeats this several times until at 3.40 I am at the end of my tether, take back to his room, feed him again and put him down in his cot. Thankfully he stays there, and sleeps to 6am.

I am utterly exhausted. I'm hoping it's just teething again! Have been using Nelson's teetha but it doesn't seem to be helping.
DH's not so helpful suggestion is to let him cry but he screams the place down, and I couldn't sleep through that! He doesn't get that the damage is done when he wakes because I then wakes up and cannot get back to sleep until ds does. Fine for him, because if he even wakes up at all he goes straight back to sleep!

Hope someone here has some advice!! I was virtually in tears last night because so exhausted.

Amani & others - me too!

DS1 slept through 7-7 from 10.5 weeks i was the smuggest (most slappable!) mother you could meet - i realise now.

DS2 - 9.5 months and not sleeping through. he has on odd nights so i know he can do it.
and it's so erratic, some nights 1 wake/feed, some nights up to 3 or 4 wakes/some feeds.

need to do something soon. and i'm not trying to work full-time too.

sympathies...

(ps i didn't DO anything to DS1, he just slept through on his own so it was 'natural' for him..)

It's just the crying in the middle of the night and then patting back to sleep that get's me, sometimes I have to keep tapping for about 20 mins otherwise she'll wake up and the whole routine starts all over again. I've bought her into my bed now, thinking that it might improve the situation as she is closer to me, but it hasn't made a jot of difference.

Oh and 20 mins seems like forever in the middle of the night...

Well I've just awoken from a full nights sleep after doing contolled crying with my ds. Luckily I only had to do it for 2 nights and last night he just slept through. I cannot beleive the transformation, someone on MN directed me to baby sleep answers website and it's the best thing i ever did. Please give it a try all of you xxx I'll try and post a link xxx

Hi all

Well my first son did not sleep completely through the night until my second child came along (he was 4.5 yrs old!)

My daughter is even more fractious! She is now 11 months old, breastfeeds 4-6 times between 11pm and 6am and refuses to go to sleep unless she falls asleep on the breast! Boy did I set myself up for a fall! You'd think I'd know better second time around wouldn't you!

I have tried controlled crying a little bit but she screams so loudly and the walls in our house are so thin I worry about the neighbours. I have the no-cry sleep solution book and I have considered trying it but that still means I have to keep breastfeeding her during the night until SHE decides she doesn't need it anymore!

I am officially exhausted and considering giving up breastfeeding but my daughter can't have normal milk/formula as she is dairy/egg/nut allergic! Any help would be amazing right now.

Love from one VERY sleepy mummy xxx

"Well I've just awoken from a full nights sleep after doing contolled crying with my ds."

Well Redybrek, I hope your full nights sleep was worth the sore throat, stress and fear of abandonment your DS had to go through to achieve it.

We are parents at night too, not just in the day, and it is our job to comfort our children when ever they need it, even if it means broken nights.

greenmonkies bollocks as always [anger]

You never cease to piss me off with your pathetic posts to anyone who dares to help their child sleep. By the sounds of it, Redybrek was at the end of her tether. Now, after a couple of nights, everyone is sleeping. Sleep depravation is a big cause of PND.

You are such a martyr. Well done.

My DS1 didn't sleep through until nearly three. He is now 4.10 and DS2 2.5. We had our first unbroken night about a month ago. We haven't had one since.

Well said Pudding25. Not everyone agrees with CC but there's no need to be so judgemental and aggressive greenmonkies.

I was never inclined towards CC but after 10 months of trying Elizabeth Pantley's solutions, DD waking 5-6 times a night, the death of my mother and gastric flu I was on my knees. I decided to try CC for 3 mights, as I think if it's going to work, it's going to work quickly.

My dd went to sleep on the first night of CC with far LESS crying than when we were rocking/feeding her to sleep, slept all night. She is bright, vivacious and gorgeous as ever all day, with no signs of a sore throat or clinginess. From the fourth night did not cry at all and hasn't for over a week now.

I do think there is far too much encouragement on CC at the moment, and I was not in support of it but I do have to say that DD's bedtime is far less stressful for HER and her sleep so much better, so I also think that knee-jerk reactions to it are as foolish as unquestioning acceptance.

Sorry for gatecrash.

Greenmonkies that is a horrible post.

What do you suggest I do then? Dd won't go to bed at all in her own room without crying, even when I'm in the room, because she wants to get in with me! If I let her do that (which I have done the past two nights), she doesn't go to sleep until 9pm and 10pm. She is then exhausted the following day.

If you are prepared to judge others, at least offer some solutions!

Sorry for the ranty post.

Amani

I personally couldn't do CC and DD, who has always fallen asleep on the breast, is 18mths and was like your DD until about a month ago when she started sleeping for 4/5 hr stretches. Last night, despite a cold, she slept for 9 hrs straight. I feel like we have turned a corner. No advice really other than to give you hope it wont last forever and given time she will find her own routine.