Giving Up Dummy

[Becky77]

OK so I keep reading that the best time to get rid of a dummy is 12 weeks as after that they for dependancy or something! My DD is now 13.5 weeks and uses a dummy to settle herself to sleep only. What I want to know is how long it'll take to wean her off it... How horrible it'll be and is it worth it seeing as she only uses it for sleeping? Oh and how do you settle a baby without forming some other settling dependancy ie rocking, singing, patting?

Thoughts please... Thanks

Evening all.

I am incredibly bad mum and had day out to local beer fest today (Oktoberfest for those who know). Was fab but meant DS only had 40m morning nap and 35m lunch-time in pushchair. Fed him and put him to bed at 3 (another 40m) and put him down early - but I have to get out once in a while, right? Will devote myself to his sleep again tomorrow.

Hey Becky - know that on - "How long was she sleeping for then" "How can I possibly monitor if she is getting enough" and this is when you realise you have become a complete control freek/your mother!!!!!

Elmmum - hows it going with the night feed? Any progress? 4m is notoriously bad time for horrible long growth spurt and v. demanding baby but like you say, it needs a few days for you to be able to tell.

WIIR - how did last night go? Know what you mean about regressing. We went cold turkey with dummy and set rules - at night we would wait for 15m for him to re-settle - then do pick up/pat and put down. First night (DS always fell asleep on bottle) put him to bed, 45m point came and crying started, waited and he self settled in 9m!! At least so DH says because he sent me out with dog as too much of a wimp!! Re-settled several times throughout night. Still had early wake up but only took 3 days to get totally rid.

Rather worryingly, seem to have replaced the dummy problem with ...... the comforter problem! DS has started taking ages to settle and last two nights in row have gone in after 15/20m to find "blue dog" (OK, I have no imagination, its blue, its a dog, he's learning valuable language!) in top corner of cot where DS can't reach. Retrieve him and put on DS's chest, pat, say "night night, time for sleep" etc and he is asleep within 3 min . Oh bum - here we go again. Maybe will just teach him to roll around the cot - lazy baby, 7.5m and does not even roll side-to-side let alone front to back.

DD has blue monkey...
Velcro blue dog to his sleepsuit!
You are only a bad mum if you fed ds beer too!

Lunch nap was crap but less crap than yesterday! 55 mins sleep, crying on and off for 10mins, in for 5 mins, sleep for 5 mins etc etc until I got her up.

I did go to a friend's today who has a 2 yr old and she said that everyone she knew took ages to get the lunch nap sorted so that made me feel better.

We thought of a piece of elastic to the bars of the cot ..... my investigate.

I am not bad mum then, but DH is definitely bad dad!

Yes, lunch nap takes ages, so they so (we're not sorted yet). And 6m onwards is notoriously pants time for sleep in general so you just have to ride it out!

Once you get one thing sorted, something else crops up. Once you get their sleeping sorted, they start having tantrums! It's all fun

We had a good night. She woke up bang on 7am.

Hope you all have a good day.

we had the jammiest night of all! She went down at 6pm (still can't move that any further back!!) woke up once at 4.30am for boob then went back to sleep until 8am!! How good is that!

If `i could only get her to go to bed a couple of hours later she'd be sleeping all the way through!! Not that this will last for long

8am-lovely! Give it another couple of weeks and maybe think about reducing the middle of the night feed????If you reduce it a bit every day, then she might stop waking for it.

Hey pudding, well done for 7am start! Yes, am just wating for the next stage now - I think it is supposed to be standing up in the cot (for practice) at 3am and after having a party, realising he needs help to get back down and screaming the place down. Ho hum.

Well there you go Becky, if you started at 8am today could you try to get her down for 7pm tonight? - might sort it all out?

DS woke at 6ish yesterday, and again today hungry (has gone off his food a bit this week so think he was simply not getting enough) but put him back down after bottle today and he slept until 8am - 3rd time in a week. Trouble is, rest of the day is going a bit strange. He definitely has another cold so may just need extra sleep as poorly, but wonder if he is just trying to sort out a new routine for himself. Definitely seems to prefer 13hrs at night though .

We are having another rubbish lunch nap. After 45 mins asleep, she let out the biggest shriek Ran in and she was fine and went back to sleep for 5 mins. Then I had 10 mins on and off crying. Went in for 5 mins and put on her light show mobile. 5 mins of talking to herself, 2 mins crying and now silence. I am just waiting for the shrieking to start.

Unfortunately we have plans to meet someone at 2.30pm so I've squeezed her naps in... Which means she probably still wont make it to 7pm... Might manage 6.30pm though which is slightly more normal!

Sorry to hear your naps are both going a bit pearshaped

Gave in at lunchtime. Took her for a walk and she had a nap until 3pm. By 4pm, she was shattered again! She is doing so many new things, I think it is exhausting her. Held her off until 4.30pm and had another 30 mins.

She was too tired for her bath and was in bed asleep by 6.30pm (although she has just cried for a min but I think has gone back to sleep).

Hope everyone has a good night.

After a great start our day went completely pearshaped Went to meet a friend and took DD for afternoon walk/nap but she didn't sleep... In the car on the way home at 5pm she started to drop off then when we got in I managed to get a bit of a feed into her before she started the overtired screaming and finally she managed to go down at 6pm.

I'll have to give her a big dreamfeed when I go to bed in a bit. God knows what her sleep will be like

Well Pudding, at least you managed to get her down well which is the important thing. And managing another nap squeezed in - DS was not having any of it today, refused pm nap even though we walked through the bumpy track in the woods for 45m (at least dog was happy). Took 55m to settled lunch time (!), and ended up having 1hr 20m - so awake at 2.15 through to 7pm ?!

But at least he did settle quicker than the last few nights so maybe he does not need his pm nap anymore (although went back in after 10m when started crying to retrieve blue dog ) and on a positive note, we have extended bed-time routine to include stories (ahhh, it was really nice) to try and give him a bigger wind down which hopefully made the difference tonight. Wonder what time we are going to be woken up tomorrow

We always do storytime. DD loves it! Although tonight, she kept trying to suck on my nose...

We've dropped storytime lately because DD is going down so early but we really need to try and get it back in there somehow!

Well last night went remarkably well... I gave her a dreamfeed at 9.30pm when I went to bed and she didn't wake up for boob until 5.30am!! Then she went back down until 7.30am when I was woken up by her chatting away... Sooooo sweet!

How's everyone's days going?

Fab stuff Becky - really pleased for you. Are you going to try to go for a 7 to 7 routine if you can then?

Pudding - nose ... hmmmm ... ok. Need to see a picture of your LO so I can imagine it! We have tried story time in the past though, but he used to get completely over-stimulated, so its nice to start doing it again.

Our day is going OK. DS woke early for food again - but only 6.45 so can cope with that. Actually, did not get up - DH decided to give me lay in which was v.nice! Trying to up his food in daytime but he keeps refusing some meals at the moment (not like him at all) but he has a cold and teething is back with a vengence so just a phase. Went down nicely for morning nap - 40m (good stuff) and has been down 1hr 10 so far lunch-nap so fingers crossed.

Have a nice Sunday everybody!

Trying too Gabster yes, but keeping her up beyond 6pm is still proving difficult, no matter how long she naps

Have a good one too!

sorry that should be "trying to"

I have a great pic of her sucking my nose. Not sure how I would put it on here though!

She woke at 7am on the dot great. Lunch nap even crappier than normal. She has done 35 mins and crying on and off since.

Oh dear, Pudding. Sounds like you are now right where I have been for the last few months.

We tried everything, cutting am nap short, physical exercise between every nap, fresh air the works. Must say, don't know how but we are getting back on track somehow. The only thing we have changed lately is brought bed-time forward 15m and waited until longer (first yawn has been ignored) before naps but really don't know if this has been coincidence or not. Who knows?!

Some people say its sleep regression - gets worse when they near perfecting a developmental stage and could figure as our LO has just perfected the pincer grip, and is now "inch-bumming".

Is she rolling over lots now? Sitting up? Maybe she is about to crawl? ooooh how exciting!

Hi all,

MIL did the dream feed and had DD in the spare room with her in the Moses Basket over night, so me and DH had a whole night's sleep. I fed her at 7am and handed her back to MIL, and went back to bed. Slept til noon!!!!!

According to MIL, DD slept fine after dream feed and only woke up a couple of times for dummy, straight back to sleep after. Woke chatting and burbling at 6.45am.

Not sure if this is because of all the extra food or because MIL is a bit hard of hearing and just didn't wake up when DD did! Either way, fingers crossed for the same tonight.

Naps still a bit erratic. She can't seem to settle herself into a nap and just gets all agitated, fighting sleep. Ah well, one thing at a time!

Have a good night all x

Ha, she's not doing any of those things! Although she is really alert and trying to grab things and reach for things. Thankfully, she is still to young to crawl!

At least her night times are good...Shouldnt speak too soon.

Morning all... How were your nights last night?

Well DD didnt wake at all for food last night... She woke a couple of times but settled herself quickly without crying... Beginning to think I should've fed her anyway as maybe 3.5 months is too young to go 12 hours without food. But at least she had a proper breakfast feed which she never normally does. Thoughts please?

Hi Becky, if she's not waking asking to be fed I wouldn't revert to feeding in the night, but 12 hours is quite a long time. Have you thought about an 11pm dream feed?

My plan of feeding more through the day seems to be working. DD went down at 7.30pm, back to sleep by 11.30pm after 11pm dream feed, a brief wake up at 5.50am-ish for dummy, and awake and burbling happily at 6.58am. Perfect!!!!

Fingers crossed that this is now her routine and not just a blip.

Supposed to be having her 2nd set of jabs today but am thinking I may postpone so as not to interfere with establishing this new routine. Get them done when we're back from holiday (which will surely interfere with routine anyway!)

Sounds like a good plan ElmMum.

I'm not really one for dreamfeeds as I usually go to bed at 9pm these days! But I agree it is rather a long time... Hmmm... Anyway she has her jabs next week and her 4 month growth spurt will follow shortly after so she'll no doubt be waking for food again soon enough

Sorry Pudding looks like it is just a stage on the nap front then!!

Well done on all the sleep catch up Ellmum

Glad you had a good night Becky.

I can't even call ours a bad night's sleep - it was more of a bad night's getting up every 45mins to re-settle the world's screamiest most tired baby, with a bit of lying in the bed trying to get back to sleep inbetween! He was waking every 45m to 1hr. Take it its the teething thing. Wish these stupid teeth would pop out now its all getting very boring.

Not sure about stopping the night feed thing. Its a personal choice - she is still quite young, but then if the morning feed is suffering then .... How long she normally feed for in the night? If it was me, and it did happen to me but I FF (as you know), when DS was off his morning feed, I would reduce the amount of night feed a bit. You could try feeding when she wakes in night, but limit it to 5m less boob for a few days and see if she re-settles easily and if the morning feed improves. If not, you could cut by 5m more etc . Must warn even when DS cut the night feed it was gradual. Some nights he wanted it some he didn't for quite a while. Still have some mornings when he demands food at 5.30/6am once in a while - last week for instance.

More interestingly, you never said she feeds badly first thing - that means her "early" wake up is not hunger but habbit/'her time'. Have you tried leaving her until 7 whether awake or not? Does she cry? I wonder whether if you left her for a few days (as long as not crying) whether she would start to sleep longer? Just a thought. You could also try something called wake to sleep from the baby whisperer book if you wanted - there is a thread here somewhere where we all tried it.

G