14 week old baby waking every 2 hours during night - any advice?

[lilipup]

Hi. My bf 14 week old dd2 goes to bed around 7ish every night, sometimes fed to sleep but sometimes awake, and goes to sleep fine. usually then sleeps to anywhere between 10 and 1-ish, although recently, waking mostly between 10 and 11pm. thereafter, waking every 2 hours for the rest of the night. needless to say, i'm knackered! she's in the cot just next to my bed, so i stagger out in the dark, feed her and plonk her back in, so usually pretty quick and we both get back to sleep fairly quickly. however, i still feel knackered in the morning after a night of broken sleep. wondering if she is having a growth spurt as well. she feeds roughly every couple of hours during the day too, although i think she actually drinks more during the night, and not sure what i can do about that at all, if i'm offering her food during the day but she just nibbles. try to feed her at night before she starts crying, as know from experience she'll settle quicker that way, and can't be bothered trying to wait it out for half an hour or so, as then not getting any sleep either!

is this amount of waking quite common at this age? does anyone have any tips on how to get her to sleep for longer? am contemplating giving her a formula top up in the evenings just to try to get her to sleep for longer, although don't want to faff around with bottles etc. and reluctant obviously to interfere with my milk production.

my toddler is a bit older, just turned 3, but apart from that a v. similar story to yours! he was such an easy baby and is still very laidback. I think that's part of what makes this harder, just being totally unprepared for it as ds1 was such a good baby.

I too have felt horrible things about ds2, when he was at his worst and just screamed and screamed all day. There were times when i had to call dp and get him to come home from work because I was scared I would hurt the baby because I just couldn't deal with it. so you aren't alone, not by a long shot.
I suddenly realised after having ds2 how people could shake their babies, or hurt them- I never got that when I just had ds1, couldn't understand it at all, but I can now.

it does get better though, I promise. the sleep may still suck a couple of months down the line, but the colicky-ness does get better/go away

you'd think I would learn to put everything I want to say in one message already wouldn't you?

I just wnated to say that sometimes for me it just helped telling someone about how crap I felt, especially my feelings towards ds2.
Jus that someone else understood made it a bit easier.

and do you also find that however awful you feel when baby is crying non-stop, the moment they stop and are happy or smiling you completely melt and are in love with them all over again?

god, we could be twins i think. very similar experience - i wanted another baby so quickly because dd1 was so easy and fantastic, i thought how hard can this kiddie thing be? then dd2 arrived, and as you say, absolutely, all my beliefs about babies turned on their head. i never let dd1 cry, fed her and she pacified immediately, everyone said she was such a good baby as hardly ever cried - with dd2, i have gotten used to her crying so much, that times when i've left her on her mat crying while i go and make a cup of tea or something, as have felt utterly useless and nothing more i can do. never thought i would do that. and yes, have felt on the brink a number of times and understand how people can shake babies, but talked about it with dh lots, and reckon that everyone will have mad thoughts like that, but most people don't act on them. have a book, the baby book, which is really good, but suggests that babies who are high need and very fussy actually benefit from all the increased attention they get. i'm not sure i agree with that yet, as my relationship with dd2 is def not as good as it was with dd1 at this age - however, when she does smile, which strangely she did from about 3 weeks and does quite a lot now, i do love her intensely, and forgive her everything!

actually I did read something similar recently, just posted by a person on another forum. but say ing the same thing, that babies do benefit from all the extra attention, and part of that is knowing that when they are distressed someone is there for them.
maybe they'd been reading the same book- but I can see how it would work.

hi, for anyone interested, i took my lo to a specialist on friday past (she is now 16wks), and she was diagnosed with silent reflux. feel so angry with all the GPs I saw for weeks, some of which i specifically asked if she might have reflux, and all of which said it was just colic. i even asked one GP for the medication ranitidane after a mumsnetter suggested it, and was told they didn't prescribe that much these days - but that is exactly what the specialist has given me for dd2! grrr. anyway, got the meds, and now we know what is up with her, we can do all the things for a refluxy baby we should be doing, some of which are different from colic which is what we thought she had. so, persist all those in doubt with screaming babies!

Hi. I read this thread with great interest. DS 16 weeks is having the same behaviour as DD in OP. He has changed from coming every 4h a night (2nd - 14 week) to every 2h (since 14 week), is bobbing off the boob during the day, eats all night and gets indigestion from it. I think he is too interested in everything to feed during the day. I am much more tired than in the first three months (and people say these are the worst -- not for me!!) and will have to return to work FT 2 weeks from now. Am also interested in the reflux. DS definitely has reflux (not diagnosed but he is frequently bringing curdled milk up). Dies this have an effect in the sleeping? DS is also a terrible day-time sleeper.

its really difficult to know what is going on with them, don't you think? i too think dd2 is reaching the stage where really interested in surroundings and might explain why she has been eating badly in last 2 weeks during day, coming off frequently etc (doc also suggested this). but, she's still waking loads at night - sleeps from 7ish to 10/11ish, then wakes around 1/2ish, 3/4ish, then usually have to bring her into bed to get her to sleep after 5ish. this past week, she's actually been falling asleep without a feed as soon as i bring her into bed, so i think tbh, its partly a comfort thing with her - now, i know she has reflux, more prepared to go with that now, as before thought she was getting into bad habits, which in truth she might be, but happy to give her the comfort she needs. things to bear in mind about reflux (i've read a lot about it recently, and all rings true with dd2 - and i do think reflux interferes with sleep, have read a bit about that too) - they don't like lying on their back as heartburn comes up easier if they are flat, so need cots raised at an angle (so this might explain nighttime discomfort and frequent wakings); sucking alleviates the discomfort from reflux, and my dd2 wakes in the night looking for something to suck on i think, also noticed she sucks a lot more when having a bad episode of heartburn during the day. my dd2 is bad at napping during the day too, even though she goes to sleep fine at night when wide awake - might be partly habit, and i suppose just not wanting to sleep when so much going on during day, but i think its down to discomfort as well as noticed she is particularly hard to get to sleep when having a bad day with reflux. she normally falls asleep if i lie beside her on the bed, but bit of a mare, as one move wakes her up, and usually wakes up again screaming after 20 mins!