Sleep regression. Anyone else want to join!? Sleepless mums!

[pinkgin1]

Currently going through what I believe could be a four month sleep regression? For ages my son slept really well didn't wake up in the night and if he did it was for one bottle then slept. Most nights slept 9:30pm till about 8am next day.
Has alllllllllll gone out the window the past week 🤣 I always knew the good sleep wouldn't last long and I appreciated it when it did but it's kinda making me feel extremely tired now including my partner🥱
How long does it last?? Will it go on for months?? Will I ever have a 8-8 again? 😥😥🤣
The strange thing is if he wakes up. As soon as I place him onto my bed and pillow he sleeps. So if it was a sleep regression surely he would wake also in my bed?

@mommabear20 it sounds more like the problem is with your husband not helping, than with your baby's sleep? 1-2 wake ups a night sounds fairly normal... but it's still tough if you're not getting the support?

@pinkgin1 really glad to hear your update 🙂

We've been co-sleeping the last few nights. My goodness it makes life easy! Back to putting him down in his cot tonight. He's been waking 2-3 times between 7-10pm again before we go up so I'm not hopeful.

How's the strategy going @JammyRedRooo

Oh @JammyRedRooo cross posted. That's great!

Ooh some good nights, that’s great to see! Last night we still had a couple of wakes after just an hour, but this morning had two 3 hour blocks which was amazing!
She still needs feeding to sleep and at every wake so I still want to break that association ideally so that my partner can handle some of the night wakings, especially because I go back to work at the end of Jan and he’s off till July now. It’s amazing what a slightly longer stretch does for how you feel though!

Well, I’ve done it…I’ve contacted a sleep consultant after another 45 mins of trying to get her to sleep. She was beside herself and nothing I could do would soothe her in her cot. I ended up cuddling her to sleep but I know she’ll be up again soon.

@LCF2021 let us know how it goes, sending nothing but solidarity and virtual hugs. Are you getting support from your partner btw?

Thanks @Sneezymcsneezy. She’s already replied and can’t fit us in for another two weeks but that’s fine as I feel like I have a timeframe to work towards. My husband is being very supportive, he’s a bit dubious of sleep consultants in general and thinks we could probably implement a very similar plan ourselves but for me it’s having the follow up support to ask questions and help make tweaks whereas I’d be doing it blindly otherwise. By the time we get cracking with it DD will be 5.5 months so going to move her into her room to start any new routine I think.

@Sneezymcsneezy how was your LO when your household had covid? My DH tested positive this morning 😔
He's locked himself in spare bedroom as I tested negative so keeping as much distance from him as I can and I'll continue to test daily. Just worried about DS 😕

@StickyStickyStickStickSong well we all had it, baby had a viral rash all over his face, like exploded. And he also projectile vommed and had diarrhea, all signs of covid. Husband was useless, similar to man flu, and I was fine just with a cough and headache. It was baby's first illness, his sleep was awful. We never confirmed if he had it, but there was no way he didn't and had all the symptoms typical for babies.

@LCF2021 I'm also in the same mind as your husband, but what you said makes sense as my neighbour also said the same thing as you when she used a sleep consultant, it was the best £500 she spent she said (7 years ago). I also think it would be useful for accountability alongside with the support and guidance. My husband is super against the baby crying, in any shape or form.. he might change his mind when he's on paternity leave (we are sharing our parental leave)

@Sneezymcsneezy I think most forms of “training” involve crying as baby gets frustrated that you’re making changes. It’s it short term crying (short bursts over a few days) for positive long term changes then I’m willing to give it a go. I also totally appreciate that this isn’t the magic answer and that she’ll start sleeping through, I don’t even expect that…I just need more than 1.5 hour stretches of sleep.

@LCF2021 that's a really positive step, fingers crossed she can help you.

Bedtime was a nightmare last night and I was up every hour after midnight again. DD refused to go back into her cot after 4am so it seems like our good few days weren't the end of the regression... Ahhh damnit!!

My DS would NOT let me put him down last night he would be asleep in my arms then if I even attempted to stand up he'd wake and start crying and going all stiff I tried a couple of times to put him in cot with no joy so he slept in with me and ended up sleeping a straight 12 hours!! I feel great it's just the little monkey got his own way. Must have wanted to be close to me but in keeping a close eye on him anyway as DH tested positive yesterday

@StickyStickyStickStickSong it was the same, as soon as I moved him next to me and put his down he was out in 2 minutes, didn't even need to do anything 😐but it's just an association I didn't want to make so I moved him after and then he woke a couple of hours after that and then a couple after that again, husband took over at 5.30am.... and then I noticed that his first tooth has cut through 😱😱😱

@LCF2021 yes to crying and so husband refuses to sleep Train as we are managing at this point in time...

I was wrong!! Past two nights , shit!

@pinkgin1 take comfort to know that your little one can sleep through, just a matter of when it would be consistent 😊

I’m really freaking out about sleep training and whether anything is going to work - on our way home from Christmas now (a 6 hour trip), and LO is crying in the car seat and has been solidly for the last hour and a bit. She’s all smiles when we take her out at services so she’s absolutely fine, she just doesn’t want to be in the car seat in the dark. She’s got a lot of resolve. Sleep training is going to be hell… but the current situation is totally unsustainable. Aaarrgh!

Argh that sounds stressful @BadgerBum Hope you get home soon! Can recommend 'The Happy Song' by Imogen Heap as a good distraction...we had it playing on loop for the last 45 mins of our journey home! I'm feeling similar about the sleep training...kind of pinning my hopes on it to improve things but trying to be realistic too! What approach are you going to try?

@Sleepymama285 thanks, will try it! We’re going to try controller crying when we move her into her own room soon. I used to be able to sit with her and pat/shush her to sleep so I was thinking I could do some kind of gradual withdrawal, but that doesn’t work any more and she now has a really strong feed to sleep association so I don’t think anything else will work, but now I’m scared that this won’t either

Controlled*

@BadgerBum we're in the same situation with feeding to sleep so may have to try something similar. I guess all we can do is try! It's so hard though as I know you have to be committed/consistent for these methods to work but then how long do you persist if you have a very determined baby who just doesn't go to sleep. I want to be consistent with whatever we try but also have a limit on how much crying I can tolerate!

@BadgerBum we have the exact same issue in the car in the dark. Just drove home from MILs to the tune of her screaming the entire time and no amount of talking or singing to her would soothe her. I feel awful

@Sleepymama285 that’s exactly it… at what point do you give up? How long do you try? It’s a minefield.

@JammyRedRooo it’s so tough isn’t it. I guess it must be weird for them in the dark. She likes looking out of the window usually, so when she can’t see anything and there’s all the shadows she is not a happy bunny and I feel so bad for her but also can’t stop everything two minutes!

Hi everyone, for some reason I stopped getting notifications for this thread. Update from my side: we stopped waking every 45 minutes finally, we went through another awful virus and had very little sleep but nowhere near as bad as the first. LO is 8 months now, wakes 3-4 times a night but we can finally handle it. Not ideal but so much better. It does end.

I'll also add, he still won't self settle and we have to rock him. So tiring! I wish I knew how to help him self settle

I'd love to know, are all babies bad sleepers? I feel a little cursed with our little boy, he's our first and I haven't slept longer than 3 hours in 8 months

@CiabattaKat sorry to hear that you have been having a rough time but glad theres been some improvement.

I think it must just depend on the baby. Some are bad, some amazing. When I was pregnant with DD I remember my mum saying that I was a dream sleeper but my younger sister was a complete nightmare. My parents did nothing different, we were just different babies and that was how it was.