I’m prepared to be told I’m a terrible mother but please hear me out.

[stillreallytired]

My 5 month old has had one half hour sleep between 1045 this morning and now.

He is screaming with exhaustion, and I’ve been sobbing as well.

I really need advice but it does need to be actual advice I can use. So:

The sling is a no go.

He will sleep in the pram but I don’t want to be overly reliant on this.

He will feed to sleep sometimes. But the problem is if he doesn’t I then have to wait until he’s hungry enough to accept another bottle.

Dummies don’t work as he spits them out or knocks them out of his mouth.

So - I’ve no idea but I am desperate.

OP having been there, to me it sounds like you have PND. Please speak to your GP. Doing so saved me and my family's sanity ..

Youre not shit op;please don't say that. Youre stressed. Big difference. They cry sometimes; its horrible and sometimes hard to stop. Please don't think the rest of us magically soothed our babies immediately whenever they got tired. I know I didnt, theres been many a shitstorm cryathon in this house. Just try not to stress as it is normal. And we have all felt like this.

There are extremely high winds and rain where I am today. It hasn’t really been safe.

@stillreallytired

Yes honey you have not missed something you have totally misread

Baby up at 6, nap of about 30 mins at 830

Then another nap in the pram about 10-1045.

Then awake until 3. Slept until 330.

So no not an emergency just a miserable awful day which has made me realise I can’t do this

Wait...

He hasn't been awake all day at all, he has had THREE naps

You're not shit, you are exhausted and struggling and it is now starting to take its toll on your mental health, hence the negative language you are using to describe yourself.

You need to take each day at a time right now. So get him to sleep by the only way that works, the pram, and worry about nursery later when you and his basic need for sleep is being met.

No thank you another I don’t think I want to open up to anybody about my terrible parenting

Anyway it’s fairly obvious people are just enjoying the drama. I wanted actual advice here.

You’re not shit, you’re at the end of your tether. You’re both knackered. Don’t worry about nursery, they some special kind of sorcery there that means they go to sleep. It’s a mystery to me, but they do, promise.
Which one of you hates the sling?
Have you got a jumperoo thing? My dd used to miraculously fall asleep upright in hers sometimes.
This will pass. You’re not shit. Have a hug.

@stillreallytired

I’m trying hamburger but everyone is just fixating on the pram.

I guess that’s it then. He will only sleep in the pram outside.he’s going to nursery soon where that won’t happen, so he’ll be overtired and exhausted all the time and I’ve done that

All day I kept thinking he’d give in and sleep, he just can’t. So I don’t know what I can or should do. That’s why I’m reach out out here even though I knew I’d get abuse. I think it’s what I deserve.

I am shit at this and should never have done it.

And don’t remove this post please MN. I want it to stay. I want to have it here just how shit I am.

By experience, children do things very differently at nursery.

My very hard to put to bed child has always slept at nursery
So I’d say don’t worry about that. They will be able to deal with him and make him sleep.

@stillreallytired

I’m trying hamburger but everyone is just fixating on the pram.

I guess that’s it then. He will only sleep in the pram outside.he’s going to nursery soon where that won’t happen, so he’ll be overtired and exhausted all the time and I’ve done that

All day I kept thinking he’d give in and sleep, he just can’t. So I don’t know what I can or should do. That’s why I’m reach out out here even though I knew I’d get abuse. I think it’s what I deserve.

I am shit at this and should never have done it.

And don’t remove this post please MN. I want it to stay. I want to have it here just how shit I am.

Don't worry about nursery, then will push him in a buggy or rock him/pat him in a cot to wean him off movement too.

Op you are exhauted baby is overtired now..

How does he sleep at night. If you are trying to change it do it slowly. Walk pram stop for a few minutes. . Then walk him to sleep then home to nap. It won't be resolved in one day.

Come on OP tons of people have left really detailed advice!

You are not shit at this OP. You're doing great, and it's just one of those days. He will sleep eventually and then tomorrow is a new day.

Yes flashy you’re right.

I’m such an idiot.

No really, I guess he hasn’t been screaming with exhaustion from about 2 pm onwards, what a fool I am.

@stillreallytired I'm sorry you are feeling this way op I think posters are trying to help you but so we arnt repeating ourselves what have you tried that hasn't worked so we can think of other things that might help

I’ll go through the thread then do I genuinely apologise if I missed some, it just seemed to be pram pram pram pram.

And you are not a terrible mum or terrible at parenting.
You have a child that is not good at sleeping. Some of them are like this. Nothing to do with you.

Would it work if you take him into your bed with you, and snuggle together and put on a film or podcast or book or something on your phone (for you to relax if nothing else). My DD2 would often get overtired and I had to force her naps- never an issue with DD1- who just slept when she was tired like I thought all babies did! How about a nice warm bath? Swaddling? White noise? Nursery rhymes? Calpol (if teething)? More milk? Bouncy chair? Jumperoo, baby swing? Something for another day, but maybe an app to keep track of naps etc if this is regular. I'd be out in the rain (hail, snow, thunder) with the pram but it sounds like that's not an option today for you.

I’ve listed in my op I think, he doesn’t like the sling, or the car, won’t take a dummy, won’t be bounced to sleep. I seriously don’t know what to do. But probably shouldn’t have posted: I thought posting in sleep I’d get actual advice.

Right now, I'd try dark room, hold him quite tight and bounce/sway/pat rhythmically until I feel like my arms will fall off. He'll probably scream a bit and then pass out if he is over tired.

We have all been here, op. You are not shit, it's a shitty situation. Breath in for 4 and out for 4 and concentrate on this, which you can control, while you mechanically rock and shush your baby.

If it's past that, now is when you throw up a flair for do/ family/ friends to help and if that isn't available you put him down somewhere safe and call cry-sis: 08451 228 669

It’s not about being a martyr it’s about not being fucking stupid enough to take a pram out with gale force winds.

I think you need to be a bit kinder to yourself. And write off the rest of today and start again tomorrow. Is it just today that he’s been having trouble? Or is it a daily battle to get him to nap? Clearly you don’t want to have to rely on the pram to get him to sleep, and I understand that. You want him to be able to take naps in his cot. What does he do when you put him down to sleep? You have to find a method of sleep training that you can cope with and that works for you. If that means leaving him to cry for a bit and self settle then so be it. You’ll get a lot of people telling you that it’s not right to leave your baby to cry, but sometimes it’s the only way to get them to sleep. Does he go down to bed at night ok? We need more information so we can help you.
Give yourself a break today. We all have our bad days, and days where we find it too hard to cope with. But it’s not a reflection on you as a mummy, so please don’t beat yourself up for not doing a good enough job. Sometimes we just want a break, and a nap in the day so you can have that break becomes really important.

@stillreallytired

I’ve listed in my op I think, he doesn’t like the sling, or the car, won’t take a dummy, won’t be bounced to sleep. I seriously don’t know what to do. But probably shouldn’t have posted: I thought posting in sleep I’d get actual advice.

Oh come on op. You've been given TONNES of advice over several threads. You are simply choosing to ignore it now.

@stillreallytired

Yes flashy you’re right.

I’m such an idiot.

No really, I guess he hasn’t been screaming with exhaustion from about 2 pm onwards, what a fool I am.

Well he was asleep from 3-3:30 ?