4 month sleep regression support group

[crazychemist]

Hi All,

Anyone want to join me for mutual handholding through 4 month sleep regression?

I’ve got twin boys, and am finding it quite tough at the moment. Long naps are completely a thing of the past, 45 mins tops. Waking every 2 hours at night. Classic 4 month sleep regression stuff.

I’m doing my best to get the majority of naps in their (our) room with swaddle, white noise, as dark as I can get it. They aren’t really self settling at the moment - I’ve been giving them a dummy because otherwise they disturb each other before they nod off. They also have a feed very close to going to sleep to get them nice and drowsy, but there’s at least a 5 minute gap between feed and sleep except at bedtime (which is mayhem due to overtiredness).

How are you finding it? What have you tried so far?

@LGBirmingham do whatever you fee comfortable with! My LO is 5 months old, I had seen her self settle before the regression hit and link sleep cycles so I knew she could do it. Sleep deprivation is NO fun. I've gone from crying every morning to have the energy to play with my DD. You may not be able to stand the crying but I could no longer stand my own crying. Now she goes down without crying (most of the time).

Hi everyone I've just found this thread hope its okay to post. Currently have a 4 month old who sounds like is going through the regression. Has never been a great sleeper (EBF) but now hes awake every 45 mins can't seem to get himself into any sort of deep sleep. Im now worrying about him as he must be exhausted!!! Can't get him to sleep at all at night, wont take the dummy just spits it out. I'm at the end of my tether and its only a week!!! Any hints or tips appreciated before I go mad 😭🙏

I think we got through it or at least we did for a few weeks, teething has put us off track, by just keeping on going. It was 5 weeks of hell. We would always try to get him back to sleep without feeding if we could but didn't always work. Some times of we caught him early enough you could just hold him in the cot. Sometimes he'd take a dummy on my lap, but rarely he'd usually spit it out. The most useful thing was my husband doing two bottles so I could get a bit of sleep at the start of the night. Also towards 5 o'clock I'd put him next to me in bed. We can't do this for the whole night as my son suffers with Silent Reflux and feeding lying down is a disaster if done more than once or twice. Otherwise I reckon bed sharing would have been very helpful.

Oh also I began holding him or taking him for a walk for all naps to ensure he got enough day sleep and wasn't overtired. It was an eye opener as he is capable of napping for 2 hrs in my lap as well as briefly awaking and going back to sleep. Prior to this he'd just wake up after 20 mins or so in the cot so got very sleep deprived.

@JulieHanlon12 you poor thing, I was there two weeks ago. It lasted a month until we did the sleep training. Have you tried putting him in the pram for a walk, wheeling him back and leaving him in there so you can get some rest? Also I often napped with my DD in our bed, she seemed to sleep longer there. If you've witnessed him resettle prior to the regression, i.e. he was napping for longer than 45 mins then as I mentioned above, you can try sleep training. There are lots of strict (controlled / uncontrolled crying) that will get you there quickly and soft (pick up and put down) methods that will get you there more slowly in a gentler way, message me for details.

It’s been a while... how is everyone? DD is just over 7 months now and we’re still struggling. There were maybe two separate weeks of just two night feeds but lately she’s waking up every cycle again, plus phases where she wakes up after just 10 or 20 minutes. With daytimes now filled by the chaos of weaning, it’s...a lot.

@BerthaYoung we're in the same boat! My son is just over 7 mths too and we've had a few weeks of 2 night feeds one at around 11/12 then at 4 and waking for the day at 6ish. But last night he woke every 30mins for first few hours. Daytime naps are still 30mins and despite trying everything he only sleeps longer than that very occasionally. The days feel pretty manic trying to manage feeds, solids, and naps I thought we'd have a bit more of a routine by now but it's proving difficult to maintain one from one day to the next! I have been feeling pretty overwhelmed so you're not the only one!

I’m consoled it’s not just me, @spendingagain - but I’m so sorry for you! It’s exhausting. Do you have any idea whether something particular is affecting your DS? I think we’re dealing with a feed-to-sleep association, plus insufficient daytime milk (because she’s too busy in the day so takes it all overnight...) plus lots of gross motor stuff, recently sitting and pulling to stand. But maybe I’m deluding myself and this will always be her way...! The one success we’ve had has been with daytime naps, we’re on a fixed schedule now and it’s way better than using Huckleberry like I was before.

@BerthaYoung I'm not sure what it is, could be a feed to sleep association too and possibly overtiredness due to short naps in the day. I'm pretty sure he's getting enough milk in the day despite also going non-stop all day. He's also just started crawling so that's another factor I think. Can I ask what schedule you follow? I'm desperate to get to that stage!

@spendingagain Yes - have sent a PM!

Hi all,

Well we were getting better nights, 3 wakes on average with 2 or 3 hour stretches. Then we got black out blinds and he started sometimes doing 4 hour stretches. Then he turned six months last week and we had 3 nights where he did 5 or 6 hour stretches. I didn't sleep though as I was lying awake wondering if he was ok, he's now in his own room you see. But then he became really unsettled again and this week he has got his third tooth and it looks like the fourth is not far behind. Last night every single stretch was 1hr45 long and he was awake for an hour and a half at 3:30. Gruelling.

I've decided not to worry about sleep associations because he managed a 6.5 hr stretch after being fed to sleep. I think it's all the milestones and stuff that cause the disruption really. I'm considering switching him from cot to floor bed and just feeding him to sleep there without moving him.

I'm sure things will improve for you both, and then get worse again, and then improve!

But he actually slept loads better in the night for having napped less. Oh I'd also add I think he's in the process of dropping his third nap so sometimes it happens and is super short and sometimes it doesn't, like yesterday, and he ends up being awake for 4 hours before bed when really he can only manage 2.5 or 3 at a push.

The day he did his 6.5 hr stretch his naps had got really disrupted with the second and third being super short as we had to take my husband to hospital with a kidney stone. Then he fell asleep for 5 mins in the car way to close to bed time. I'm wondering if all this focus on overtiredness on the internet is sometimes wrong and undertiredness can actually cause more problems?

I wonder if naps could be causing issues for others too?