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Original poster

High Needs baby support thread

834 replies

LittlePixieMa · 07/12/2015 17:49

Any of this familiar?

1 baby needs to be constantly held
2 feeds frequently during the day
3 feeds or comfort sucks through the night
4 won't sleep alone
5 HATES the pram and/or car seat
6 takes short naps
7 doesn't like being held / left with others
8 gets bored or over stimulated very quickly

Feeling exhausted and want some support from others with spirited fussy babies

If so join the club Smile

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Original poster
LittlePixieMa · 04/01/2016 16:40

Llama - that's fab your ma slinged him to sleep!! Mine doesn't even bother to visit! MIL has tried to but he just gets worked up!

How is everyone today?

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Original poster
LittlePixieMa · 04/01/2016 20:35

Do you all have a bedtime routine?!

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Yarpyarp · 04/01/2016 21:56

Tried a couple of things today, first nap in the pram instead of sling - which was successful and she managed to sleep for half and hour and then just sat there for another half an hour awake while I pottered about, so that's big progress! Still used the sling this afternoon but happy to know the pram isn't so bad for her. I've turned the buggy bit round so she faces front which has made a huge difference when out and about. I don't think she liked travelling backwards which is potentially what the problem is in the car.

Also trying to do a bedtime as previously she just sat up with us all evening and fed on and off. Tonight I fed her in bed and put her down in our room. Lasted an hour til she woke but think it was wind more than anything. So will keep trying that - I just feel she needs to be in bed at a reasonable hour - she is falling asleep about 8/8.30 naturally now whereas before she would be awake til 11ish

The only thing I want to try and avoid is feeding to sleep as it means I am the only one who can put her to bed. But it's the easiest and most peaceful option so that's going to be a tricky one!

I'd like to try and achieve this 'drowsy but awake' state of going to bed but think it's easier said than done. Anyone have any tips?! Are any of you doing baby whisperer/Gina ford or just free-styling?

EssiesInvisibleLlama · 04/01/2016 22:01

Bedtime routine here consists of bath and pj's and a story if he can handle it. After that it all goes to pot and anything can happen. Tonight I slinged him to sleep and he woke up grinning after 5 mins so ended up in his high chair throwing toys on the floor while we ate tea. Then after another 2 hours playing and shrieking I eventually managed to bf him to sleep! I think I need to drop the tea time nap cos he's had far too much energy in the evening for the last few nights!

The buggy has a massive puncture and I'm actually gutted! Never thought I'd see the day where the buggy was my friend!

EssiesInvisibleLlama · 04/01/2016 22:05

X posted with you yarp. Well done with the buggy nap! My ds definitely prefers facing outwards too. Hadn't thought that rear facing might be the issue in the car. That's a good point.

Re the drowsy but awake thing, I'm free styling and hoping ds will learn the skill eventually in his own time. Currently I am trying to get to the point where I can bf him to sleep at bedtime simply so we can have a calm bedtime. Until recently I've had to sling or rock him to sleep every night cos he's been so wound up in the evening!

deathb4decaf · 05/01/2016 07:19

Free styling here too, I read the baby whisperer book but it made me feel like I'd failed! I've always fed DD to sleep, it just felt right to me.

Bedtime routine is bath, white noise and dim light, pjs, sleeping bag, feed in the dark. Shhh-ing, singing, jigging...I used to be able to put her down after that for a good few hours and have some time to myself downstairs. Separation anxiety has definitely kicked in now though and I end up in bed at 7 with her!

she seems so exhausted by the end of the day and gets really worked up after I get her out of the bath. I need to make bedtime later but we're in a cycle of 5.30 waking..ideas welcome!

How long does it take you all to get dc's to sleep in sling? It takes me ages sometimes, I've started putting the extractor fan on in the kitchen and standing under it, seems to help!

DD seems to go to sleep in the car when me and dp are having a conversation we bore her to sleep

How many naps do your dc's have? and how long are they?

Original poster
LittlePixieMa · 05/01/2016 08:11

I'm free styling it too. Gina ford is an evil interesting read, the only book I like is The Gentle Sleep Book. Makes far more sense than anything else I've read, and confirms that feeding to sleep etc is natural.

Woohoo Yarp pram nap! That's awesome!!! Must try the buggy again, I'm lazy and can't be bothered with it as I know slinging is easier ignoring the fact that my hip is killing me

Llama yeah baby pixie is full of beans in the eve at the mo!! Lol, I wish the buggy was my friend!!!

Ours naps have changed the last week to
11ish am sling nap for an hour
3.30 ish boob nap for 2 hours
Bed time anything from 7.30 - 9!!!!

Drowsy but awake mine does that all the time while in the sling or attached to my boob

Db4d used to take minutes for a sling nap, suddenly a lot longer, but I think that's because he can stay awake longer and I haven't adjusted to that yet

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deathb4decaf · 05/01/2016 08:27

How old is DS pixie? How long is he awake in the morning before his first nap? DD is still having frequent, short naps but does seem to have started a 2 hour one roughly between 2 and 4. How are the solids going?

Original poster
LittlePixieMa · 05/01/2016 09:34

He's 7 months. Before Xmas he was awake for 2.5 hrs in the morning before his first nap, now it's 3.5 to 4 hours, big sudden change........ Be interesting to see what happens now OH is back at work!

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deathb4decaf · 05/01/2016 10:25

That's interesting, DD gets tired every 1.5-2 hours at the moment. it's exhausting!

Original poster
LittlePixieMa · 05/01/2016 10:38

Mine was like that. Tonnes of 1/2 hr cat naps!! Couldn't go much in between without an overtired melt down! How old is yours? Xx

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deathb4decaf · 05/01/2016 11:14

She's 6 months. can you sit down when doing sling naps? DD knows when I sit down and instantly wakes up!

Original poster
LittlePixieMa · 05/01/2016 14:15

I wish I could sit down! Instantly awake!! Cat naps here again today! Maybe the last week of longer naps was a fluke!!

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Yarpyarp · 05/01/2016 14:25

Did another pram sleep this morning!..again only lasted half an hour (and took half an hour of moaning) whereas would be in the sling in the morning for up to 2 hours. Sometimes takes minutes of silence in the sling, sometimes up to 15 mins of telling.

I'm going to try and stick with at least 1 pram nap though. She's 4 months and I think going through the dreaded sleep regression - used to sleep 7/8 hours at night but now 2/3 hours at a time. That, coupled with shorter naps then throws the days out a bit but we are very loosely doing the baby whisperer EASY routine with a fair bit of free style thrown in as well!

deathb4decaf · 05/01/2016 15:15

Its not just me then pixie! Oh no cat napping again? They love keeping us on our toes...

When you all do pram naps do you go out every time? I've tried tricking my DD into indoor ones (racing up and down the house) but she's not fooled.

Yarpyarp · 05/01/2016 16:08

Definitely not just you!

Pram naps indoors. She used to scream and scream in the pram whenever we went out so I used to just sit her in it in the house whenever possible. She then fell asleep in it while we were out so that gave me confidence she could do it!

Original poster
LittlePixieMa · 05/01/2016 18:05

Yarp the 4 month sleep regression is awful! We only had a couple of night wakings before a that.... Still not over it at 7 months not to scare you

Haha db4d if I used the pram in the house if be doing a perpetual 3 point turn! I've still not succeeded in a pram nap....

Just when I thought I new his nap routine he's gone and fucked it up changed it. It's 6 pm and he's only just give down for his last nap........ But late, God knows what tonight will be like....

On the plus side I was brave and gave him finger food today!! Well cooked broccoli and carrot sticks! Made a lot of mess but some went in the mouth!!

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EssiesInvisibleLlama · 05/01/2016 19:28

Well done with the finger food pixie! V exciting!

Db4d you could be me. DS is 18 weeks and takes forever to get to sleep in the evenings. I used to sling him to sleep but I've been trying not to recently cos the problem with that is that I still have to get him into his grobag without waking him. He seems so exhausted in the evening he's almost too tired to go to sleep. He was having a cat nap at 5 ish but recently he's wanted to go to bed then and hasn't wanted to wake up from the nap for bath time but when forced to wake is then up for hours. He used to go 4 hours once in bed but now goes a max of 2 hours at night. He used to sleep til 7am but has got up at 5:35 exactly for the last fortnight. It's so knackering! I'm optimistic it'll improve though! Eventually?

Original poster
LittlePixieMa · 05/01/2016 21:24

Llama - haha, yes nightmare with grobags! Sling to sleep, then they wake to put grobag on, then boob to sleep! Lol.

Similar hear with evenings. Wants to stay asleep from 5pm, but I'm sure if I let him he'd wake at midnight for play time. Does seem like they're overtired and fight to stay up.

Of course it'll improve in a few years soon.....

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Yarpyarp · 05/01/2016 21:37

I actually thought sleep regression lasts about a week.....not months! Oh dear dear. I knew it was all going too well at night!

Which slings do you have? I have seen a demo with a connecta where the baby's legs stay together, as if they are sitting on a swing. Would work with a grobag on then.

nailsathome · 05/01/2016 21:53

Oh my goodness can I join you?!

I have a 7month old who wants feeding or my undivided attention at all times and has done since birth. He won't nap unless it's attached to my nipple or in a moving car.

I just want some personal space!

Original poster
LittlePixieMa · 05/01/2016 22:12

Yarp maybe your sleep regression will be shorter than ours!! I use the ergo 360. Positions their hips and spine correctly.

Nails welcome!! Yes join the banter! Haha, personal space....what's that?!!

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EssiesInvisibleLlama · 06/01/2016 02:53

Hi nails! Welcome!

Anybody else up at 3am for the millionth night on the trot?!

deathb4decaf · 06/01/2016 07:23

Morning everyone!

I'm already pacing the kitchen with the tumble drier, extractor fan and radio on, drinking cold tea. One day we'll look back at this thread and laugh, right?!

llama I've resigned myself to early nights for the time being so when DD gets me up at 5.30 it isn't such a killer. We ate dinner at 4.30! DP is off for a week soon and I've got a plan to make bath time a bit later every night. It probably won't help, I think it's to do with her body clock and will change at some point on its own....

yarp the regression is so different for everyone, we had a few random nights of hourly wakings, every 20 min wakings, then she did settle into longer stretches again quite quickly, but the pattern completely changed and isn't quite as reliable. Also we had to start co sleeping a lot more to get some sleep. At the moment she's in with us all the time.
I've also got the ergo 360, it's been a God send. (Thanks for recommendation pixie)
What I like about it is it's so simple to put on, I never got on with stretchy, wrappy, tie on things. I think a lot of MNers rate the connecta though!

Welcome nails I know what you mean about the undivided attention. My DD has started to loudly object if I dare to look away/go into the next room! I know its natural but it'd be nice just to get a drink without feeling bad!

deathb4decaf · 06/01/2016 07:30

Were any of you like this as babies? My mother tells me I was, says everyone told her to just let me cry, she tried it for 5 mins and I was hysterical. She didn't do that again!

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