High Needs baby support thread

[LittlePixieMa]

Any of this familiar?

1 baby needs to be constantly held
2 feeds frequently during the day
3 feeds or comfort sucks through the night
4 won't sleep alone
5 HATES the pram and/or car seat
6 takes short naps
7 doesn't like being held / left with others
8 gets bored or over stimulated very quickly

Feeling exhausted and want some support from others with spirited fussy babies

If so join the club

Thanks Mum undone, those are words I need to hear today! Can I ask did you do anything, or did it just get better on its own?

Mumundone thanks for the reassurance!! Did you breast feed to sleep? If so how did you get yours to sleep without it?!! X

Hand enough today! Bloody cat woke him up, now DS keeps biting and clamping down on my nipple, when I finally get him off he screams. Not in a good mood at all now!!!!

This is my 3rd attempt to post, hope it works this time! Stoopid phone.

Hope everyone is doing ok...

LittlePixieMa, DS never really fed to sleep except in the very early days, so can't offer any advice there I'm afraid. Basically, nothing I did seemed to help him go to sleep so he would cry and cry until eventually conking out. Unless being held in a specific position over my shoulder, he would sleep for 15 mins max and wake up very grumpy.

Purpleboa, I tried pretty much everything to help him sleep - white noise, dummy, blackout blinds, tilted cot, craniel osteopathy, rocking, singing, bouncing, wearing, feeding on demand, feeding to a routine etc etc. Also went to the doc to rule out allergies. Fiinally reached the end of my tether at about 16 weeks when I decided that if he was going to cry regardless of what I did, he may as well cry in his cot.

Lots of stroking and shushing (never left him alone to cry and always made sure he wasn't hungry etc.) but was quite strict about not picking him up, and all sleep being in his cot. Gave him a muslin which has still uses now, he chews and sucks it. Bottle-fed at night so DH could help. Eventually DS got used to sleeping in his cot and got himself into a nightime feeding routine.

Sounds quite harsh in retrospect - obviously the not picking up part won't be right for all babies and parents - but I was so tired I had to do something! It did take a good couple of months though, and we always had to be at home for naps which was a pain.

'MumUndone' that is good to know, thanks! That's how I feel - if she cries regardless, it might as well be in the cot! We're 6 months in though so I know habits will be harder to break

'Pixie' hope you are having a better day

How's it going everyone?

Am I mad? I'm in bed with dd by 7pm every night because she won't go in her cot and it's not safe for her to be alone on the bed. I can't even transfer her to cot when she's asleep anymore as it's had to be lowered so much. I've eaten a sandwich in bed for dinner! If I baby proofed the room, put the mattress on the floor and used the monitor would that be safe?!

Sleepy head?

www.johnlewis.com/sleepyhead-deluxe-portable-baby-pod-white/p231482924?sku=231482924&kpid=231482924&s_kenid=8eb52e5d-8048-43ff-afa4-01b084b16cbc&s_kwcid=403x791855&tmad=c&tmcampid=73

Hi mumundone! We've got a sleepyhead which has worked in the past but dd is mobile now and would definitely escape!

She's 8mo btw

Does my baby sound like I need to join? Only sleeps about 10 hours max max per 24 hours and that's only when being held/in sling during day and attached to boob at night (cosleeping) - she's nearly 6 weeks

Hey all!
Sorry for the silence, I'm bloody knackered! Some weeks I feel as though I'm coping so well, others I just want to crumble!!

Db4d if you're mad then so am I! I'm not sure we have any choice?!! If I could roll of the bed in the eve I would, but he wakes. I've got a bed guard one side and his cot with the side off the other. One day when I do manage to roll of I'll use the baby monitor and belt upstairs ASAP the moment he wakes so he doesn't crawl off. My bed is too big to take apart and just have a mattress.

Welcome Belle!! Some people say you can't tell if they're high needs that young, by I knew within weeks! We're 9 months and still have to co sleep attached to the boob!!

Llama where are you?!!! Is all okay?!!

Thanjs littlepixie - I guess time will tell....

Belle what's your DD like in the car and pram? Is she you're first? I spent the first few months trying to fix my son, I couldn't understand why his sleep was so unlike at the other babies at groups. I wish I'd accepted how he was earlier on so I could have enjoyed him more! Xx

Don't have a car so no idea, generally ok in the pram but some days just screams continuously in there even when walking etc. Yes she's my first.

Hi all! Db4d not mad at all! My DD still just about manages an initial stretch in her cot, although we're down to an hour, then I've been giving up bringing her in with me. Currently she's asleep on me after her first waking. Every time I try to put her down, she wakes and cries. I just want an hour to myself to properly stretch out, how has that become too much to ask???

Pixie I hear ya on the coping! I'm amazed at my resilience sometimes...but other days it's just too much and I'm a zombie.

I wish I knew what I am meant to be doing. So many suggestions out there but I'm too tired to try them. So we just plod on...and on...hoping for light at the end of the tunnel...

Hi Belle! Tbh at six weeks that sounds very normal! Fingers crossed your baba isn't high needs and it evens out. You do not want to be here 8 months on and getting even less sleep some nights than you fud when your LO was a newborn!

Thanks purple for you

Evening all

We took the bed frame off and stuck the mattress on the floor! the first night she slept for three hours (in sleepyhead) initially, then last night it all went tits up but I think she's teething.... Wonder what tonight will bring....

I think about using a sleep consultant quite a lot, but I know what they'd say- put her in cot and don't pick her up... I really can't face doing that. The other ones don't promise results but I can't help but think they might have some ideas! Does anyone else feel extremely desperate tempted?!

purple do you feed to sleep then transfer to cot for that first bit?

Db4d in the past I thought about sleep consultants, but after a lot of reading about them I wouldn't be happy (apart from Sarah Ockwell-Smith - the gentle sleep method). All the others seems to use sleep training, all of which include crying, and I can't see any benefit in crying to sleep, whether or not in grills results, I just feel it can't be healthy. One day we'll look back and be pleased that we nurtured their sleep and made it a happy most of the time place to be.

Sleep has gone completely wrong here today. He was asleep with DH in sling, as usual we transferred him to boob so DH could get on with stuff (not sure why I don't ever get the chance to have me time!), but DS woke and cried his eyes out. Couldn't settled him again so he's had minimal nap time today. Who knows what the night shall bring........,

Same issue here today littlepixie - had about 1.5 hours of naps only when recommended for a nearly 6 week old is more like 6 hours :as

• that should be a :s face

Ah tried pram again today, walked around whole of park with a screaming baby! The only time she stopped is when I picked her up! Only started using the sling just over a week ago - how can she have developed a habit this fast!

Belle bless, it's not a habit, just knows where the best and safest place is, all tucked up next to Mama!

Hard work always wearing her though! Had nct meet up yesterday, everyone else's baby happily napping whenever they wanted in the pram, my DD awake the whole time (no sleep between 11am and 5.30pm yesterday!) xx

Sorry I fell off the thread! Thanks pixie for coming to find me! Will update in a min. I'm just watching country file (with ds attached to boob of course).

Please please please may the babies sleep well tonight!!! I'm sooooo tired!!!!!