Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Sleepless of Mumsnet - join us if your LO consistently laughs in the face of sleep!

999 replies

Purpleboa · 05/12/2015 13:53

Hi everyone. I thought I'd create this thread when I saw that there were quite a few of us lingering on the 4 month regression thread, with babies that clearly didn't get the memo about things getting better!

I've seen another thread for parents whose children are long term poor sleepers but I think it's been relegated to zombie status. So I hope nobody minds if I start another one! If your LO consistently struggles to sleep, whether it's down to diet, night terrors or just sheer bloody mindedness, please pull up an armchair and join in! I'll supply the espressos, hugs and chocolate, wine and tears served after 4pm.

I'll start: my DD is 25 weeks. She's gorgeous, adorable and the absolute light of my life. Unless it's between the hours of 7pm and 7am! She's struggled with sleep always. I thought things would improve following the 'fourth trimester' but she got a cold, reacted badly to her jabs...and before I knew it we'd cruised into the 4 month regression. Which she's either still in, or she's teething, or developing, or wonder weeking, or fck knows really!

The past two weeks have been particularly painful and I feel I'm reaching the limits of my endurance. I love being her mum, I love spending time with her...but not sleeping makes it oh so very hard.

I have found Mumsnet to be a wonderful source of support during those dark and lonely hours when you feel like you're the only person in the world going through this. So I wanted to give back and support others too.

I'll put the kettle on...

OP posts:
Purpleboa · 14/12/2015 11:13

Ufft, waiting for the window repair guy to arrive. Really need to get DD down for a nap but can't do it till he is here! Was due at 11 grr!

OP posts:
Bugaboom · 14/12/2015 16:09

I've reached a new low in my sugar consumption- I've eaten my my ds' chocolate coins Blush

Purpleboa · 14/12/2015 16:24

Ha ha bug! I have consumed two chunky kitkats today. Mild by my standards...

OP posts:
zombiemeow · 14/12/2015 18:26

Has slowed down now, he had a huge runny poo about an hour ago (a throw away vest jobby) but before that he hadn't had one for a few hours.

He hasn't napped today apart from a short one in the morning but has been very jolly Hmm. His first tooth is also cutting Shock (I think that's the word for it?).

Bugaboom Grin ds has some dairy free coins in the cupboard for Christmas Eve, they have been tempting me, he will only need one....

starfish12 · 14/12/2015 18:41

Yesterday I had 2 x df mince pies and 2 Mr kipling fruit pies... I can't seem to just have one of anything anymore! Probably a good thing I'm having to be dairy free as I'd probably have no teeth left by now.
Managed to get both kids asleep in their cots today and I actually had a nap. Amazing what some normal behaviour can do for your mental health!!

zombiemeow · 14/12/2015 18:48

Wow. 10 mins, 10 mins he slept before the first wake up. Think it's going to be a long one Sad

For those of you that are bf and df, is it easy? What milk do you use in tea and things?

Lilipot15 · 14/12/2015 19:02

Zombie I was dairy free with my first. I used almond milk in coffee and I think I may have had black tea as I couldn't find a nice alternative for tea. Soya yogurts were okay.

If you are sticking to dairy free make sure you are getting enough calcium and vitamin D - you should take a breast feeding supplement but a dietician also told me I needed more. Worth looking into as you need to keep up your reserves.

Lilipot15 · 14/12/2015 19:03

Oh and Holland and Barret, Sainsburys and Morrisons did the best range of free from biscuits etc I found!

Bugaboom · 14/12/2015 20:12

I've just spent 25 minutes walking around with dd in a sling. She'd calm and then go beserk so I'm feeding to sleep again. Feeling like a bit of a failure and that I'll never actually manage night weaning.

zombiemeow · 14/12/2015 20:23

Bugaboom you are defiantly not a failure Thanks wish I could offer some advice but I have no clue with night weaning. Could you see if dh could settle her, no idea if it works but I read a long time ago that h's can settle them easier as they can't sense the milk. Absolutely no clue at all if that works/is true.

Second wake up here.

Lilipot15 · 14/12/2015 20:27

How old is she Bug? I posted a thread about how to stop feeding to sleep. The overall response was that why stop if it works. So I'm carrying on for now. Bit worried that we're in a cycle though but that's where we're at for now!

Bugaboom · 14/12/2015 20:29

Thanks zombie. I think we're going to try over new year when dh home for a few days. Does your ds have milk in the night? I think I'm clinging to the whole idea that stopping bf at night will make her sleep but in truth she may just be a poor sleeper.

zombiemeow · 14/12/2015 21:21

He had milk in the night until he was around 10 months old, I was told by the dietitian to stop as he wasn't very interested in food, just loved his milk. I upped his food and swapped bottles in the day for snacks (gradually) and gave him water/baby juice etc and then he dropped his night bottle but he was ff.

Is your hv any good, or useless like mine? If they're good they may be able to give you some good advice on night weaning.

Bugaboom · 14/12/2015 21:39

Sorry lili I missed your post. She's 11 months. I'm inclined to agree about if it works just do it, but coming up to a year of being the only one who can settle her is getting a bit much. Just worried how I'm going to cope back at work. I could cope with one feed (or even two) a night but the constantly wanting to latch on is driving me nuts.
zombie haven't visited hv really apart from a weaning question. Ironically at her 10 month check she'd had two nights of waking at 12 and 5 so I thought we turned a corner and hv agreed that as long as I was happy to continue dd would probably just drop those feeds by 12 months. It all went to shit again that very night!! I might try them again.

Lilipot15 · 14/12/2015 21:43

Ah, Bug, I think I would be thinking the same at 11 months. At the mo I'm telling myself she needs the calories at six months from milk and life is busy in the daytime for a nosy baby so maybe she night feeds more.

If you get useful advice from health visitor please share!
We used controlled crying with great effect in 3 nights at 16 months with my eldest but it was for settling to bed, she wasn't actually too bad for waking and certainly wasn't waking for feeds. I'd stopped breast feeding by then anyway, as she took to bottles well at 6 months. And now look where that got me, pregnant straight away - beware Wink

Bugaboom · 14/12/2015 21:48

Thanks Lili! We also did cc with my ds and it worked. I don't know why I have a bit of barrier up about it with dd. She's such as happy day baby that I feel guilty about it. And ds had a bottle and a dummy so he would take 9oz before bed and then have his dummy so it seemed to work quite well..she won't take anything other than boob for comfort which make's it harder.

zombiemeow · 14/12/2015 22:13

I have been told cc by gp a few times and by one consultant but I just can't Sad I tried it one night and I had a full on breakdown, I was in tears on the floor.

Bugaboom it's typical, it would start that one day! Would defiantly ask them about night weaning.

How's everyone's nights going?

Purpleboa · 14/12/2015 22:28

Hey all. On first waking of the night. Gah. Had hoped to make it till later. Suspect it's going to be a bad one.

Re. night weaning, ugh I'm dreading that battle. My DD is almost 6 months, so I know that they say she doesn't really need feeding overnight. Something tells me she might not share that view!! Going to start with formula once she starts weaning. Alhough she's still not taking a bottle so that could be...interesting.

Does anyone else sometimes query their decision to breastfeed?? I love doing it but do not love the problems that come with it!

OP posts:
Bugaboom · 14/12/2015 22:41

Dd was starting to stir so I've just come in and fed her told you i was shit at night weaning in the hope I can now sleep rather than lying awake waiting for her to wake.
I don't think I query my decision to breastfeed but I do wish I got her used to other people settling her early on..I'm sure it might have been possible. Although when I think how it easy it was when ds started formula at 6 months I do wish she taken a bottle.

Lilipot15 · 14/12/2015 23:03

Yes, the controlled crying was much easier when I knew DD1 had taken a good bottle and also was great at finding a dummy. At a slightly older age too as she was more able to understand that we always come back. At 11 months she was having bad separation anxiety so I think timing of CC needs good parental judgement.

I'm trying to tell myself to stop dwelling on sleep so much, and not have the first thing I tell DH in the morning be how little sleep I've had! If I have a good coffee at some point I seem to be able to function!

I am trying to keep her in her own room tonight as I have a cold and pretty sure my coughing will disturb her. My resolve may weaken as the night goes on....

zombiemeow · 15/12/2015 06:15

Not too bad a night here Hmm I lost count of wake ups but he didn't stay awake iyswim. He settled wth dummy and being lay down. Up at 4.45. His 'up' time seems to be getting earlier and earlier.

I have woke up with an absolute stinking cold and sore throat Sad

starfish12 · 15/12/2015 09:34

Agree purple... everyone tells you to breastfeed but no one seems to be able to tell you how to stop! That said I'm glad I am since little man is cmpi - just trying to get my head around doing it for a year as I really only wanted to do 6 months max. I'd be fine with continuing if he wasn't on my boob all night. Like lili I know he's just doing it for comfort.

I know what you mean lili - i spend the day analysing what I should /shouldn't be doing re sleep and my thoughts swing between feeling this is all normal and fine to what the fuck am I doing... depending on how tired I am.

4 or 5 wake ups for us... Can't really remember. Was hrly tho at one point

zombiemeow · 15/12/2015 09:47

Currently trying desperately to get a very tired baby to sleep before his Christmas party, we have to leave in half an hour Hmm he's fighting it so much, don't think it's Guna happen.

In other news, I ate a whole pizza for breakfast at 5am Blush

thinkfast · 15/12/2015 10:06

Dd had a miracle night with only 2 wake ups!!!!! Slept til 8!!!!!

I have a migraine which came on last night and was up most of the night with the pain.

Typical!!!

Pyjamaramadrama · 15/12/2015 10:19

Try not to think that way about breastfeeding. You've done a great thing for the baby. I stopped breastfeeding quite soon and I really regret it. It makes me sad every day. Considering I gave ds formula and a dummy the supposedly easy options he still wakes several times a night and sometimes the only way I can get him to go back to sleep is to co sleep.

At the same time don't feel guilty if you are ready to stop.