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Original poster

Sleepless of Mumsnet - join us if your LO consistently laughs in the face of sleep!

999 replies

Purpleboa · 05/12/2015 13:53

Hi everyone. I thought I'd create this thread when I saw that there were quite a few of us lingering on the 4 month regression thread, with babies that clearly didn't get the memo about things getting better!

I've seen another thread for parents whose children are long term poor sleepers but I think it's been relegated to zombie status. So I hope nobody minds if I start another one! If your LO consistently struggles to sleep, whether it's down to diet, night terrors or just sheer bloody mindedness, please pull up an armchair and join in! I'll supply the espressos, hugs and chocolate, wine and tears served after 4pm.

I'll start: my DD is 25 weeks. She's gorgeous, adorable and the absolute light of my life. Unless it's between the hours of 7pm and 7am! She's struggled with sleep always. I thought things would improve following the 'fourth trimester' but she got a cold, reacted badly to her jabs...and before I knew it we'd cruised into the 4 month regression. Which she's either still in, or she's teething, or developing, or wonder weeking, or fck knows really!

The past two weeks have been particularly painful and I feel I'm reaching the limits of my endurance. I love being her mum, I love spending time with her...but not sleeping makes it oh so very hard.

I have found Mumsnet to be a wonderful source of support during those dark and lonely hours when you feel like you're the only person in the world going through this. So I wanted to give back and support others too.

I'll put the kettle on...

OP posts:
starfish12 · 15/12/2015 10:33

Pizza sounds nice zombie.... hope the party is fun!

2 is amazing think... argh how frustrating re the migraine. Hope it's cleared and you get another good night.

Purple re getting DD on a bottle, I tried every evening before bed after feeding on me with DS1. Took about 3 weeks of him playing with the teat to actually sucking then we were off and running. Try the same time every day and it should pay off. X

Original poster
Purpleboa · 15/12/2015 11:34

Lol liking your work Zombie! Mmm pizza...

Slightly better night, wake ups every two hours (jeez, when did I get grateful for so little). But awake at 530 and ready to play! My nct mum friends were comparing morning routines, and apparently they all have babies who allow them a nice lie in, even a long shower. Once my DD is awake, she's decided the day had started! Although am getting a bit better at her playing in her cot for a bit while tired old mum tries to doze.

Yeah, I know what you mean about bf. I just get a bit ranty sometimes because I feel so limited in what I can do. Especially now it's Christmas and party season. I'm sick of not being able to go out on an evening, not being able to have a proper drink and being the only one who can feed DD. We're persevering with the bottle daily but it's so frustrating! Especially as I find it difficult to express, so seeing the milk I do manage to squeeze out getting chucked away makes me want to cry some days!

However, that's encouraging to know Starfish so I will keep going! Might try the doidy cup too and see if we have any luck with that.

OP posts:
Original poster
Purpleboa · 15/12/2015 11:36

Oh and sorry to hear about your migraine think - sods law innit! How are you now?

OP posts:
Pyjamaramadrama · 15/12/2015 11:49

I know it's easy to say when bottle feeding and you can hand the baby to someone else if you need to. The grass is always greener.

6 months is quite an accomplishment though Smile

I'm currently trying to persuade ds to take a sippy cup but he's having none of it.

Pyjamaramadrama · 15/12/2015 11:54

Yes it is horrible chucking away your own milk when it's taken so much to express.

Can you freeze it if she's refusing it from a bottle? I remember being told breast milk is OK out of the fridge for a while and can be frozen. You could even use it for adding to her food later on.

Original poster
Purpleboa · 15/12/2015 12:05

Thanks pyjama. Yeah I have thought of freezing it but I never seem to get enough expressed! Think I just need to put time aside to do lots. But then DD spots what I'm doing and gets jealous!

OP posts:
Bugaboom · 15/12/2015 12:06

Oh my I have put a post on here twice and it hasn't posted! I went to Hv today. She was nice but firm. Cold turkey on night feeds. Said she doesn't need them. And no more feeding to sleep at bedtime. It's basically control cry. No getting her out if cot but keep going back to reassure and lie her down. I feel so conflicted. I feel run down, have a constant headache and can't stop crying today. But to not even give a cuddle in the night feels cruel Sad

Pyjamaramadrama · 15/12/2015 12:09

Ah yes time, the thing we seemed to have before these little cute troublesome babies. When I do get time I tend to want to sleep, eat chocolate and watch TV or clean the house.

Pyjamaramadrama · 15/12/2015 12:09

How old is your lo bugaboom?

Pyjamaramadrama · 15/12/2015 12:11

Sorry just seen 11 months.

starfish12 · 15/12/2015 13:53

I need to start expressing... never any bloody time tho esp now solids have been started. Too busy roasting bloody vegetables!
You probably know this already purple but just in case... I got some expressing advice and basically they recommended having a video of your baby crying to trick your body into thinking you are feeding. And to have a photo of them during feeding and to lean forward. Loads of water and eat oats for milk production. Oh and to be relaxed. Made me laugh as I'd been trying that morning whilst trying to get my toddler ready and literally managed a dribble. Need to create a zen environment....

Oh bug - sounds awful. I really don't want to resort to crying either. Can you switch your bedtime routine around so feeding happens before bath so at least for first going off to sleep you aren't feeding? Then you can hopefully avoid tears and get baby to sleep by patting or ssshing or just being there? Worth a try?

Xx

zombiemeow · 15/12/2015 14:17

Bugaboom cc is pretty much all hv advise ime with the sleep issues. Can you offer water at night instead of bf?

zombiemeow · 15/12/2015 14:19

Oh and bugaboom do you do the last feed down stairs? Or in a different room to where she sleeps so it's not a sleep crutch.

Bugaboom · 15/12/2015 15:38

She did suggest water but I suspect dd will hit it away but we'll try. No last feed is in her room. The challenge is I have her and her brother to put to bed as dh works late. So hrs watching a film downstairs which distract her. I just need to clear my head and make a plan. Both mine a bit under the weather so probably not the right time.
How have the naps been today? X

zombiemeow · 15/12/2015 17:03

Naps are crap! He gets so tired around 2/3pm but fights his nap so much that in the end I put him to bed at 5.30/6 as he's too tired to function.

I'm thinking if I can get one more nap in and push bedtime back he wouldn't have these early morning wake ups but I have no idea how Sad he just fights and fights until it's so late he may aswell just go to bed. I manage sometimes to get him to 7pm but that hasn't made a difference, I think it's because he gets over tired then

Pyjamaramadrama · 15/12/2015 17:14

Zombie I've managed to crack the daytime nap routine finally.

If we get up at 7 which we usually do he naps at 9am, to do this I usually drive a bit further after the school run and he sleeps in the carseat.

Then he has another nap between 11-12, I put him in his cot now (this has only started working the last month), I have to close the blinds, put him in his sleeping bag and I have to get up several times to lie him back down he fights it so much and it can take 30 minutes to go to sleep but if I'm lucky he might sleep for 90 minutes.

Next nap is around 4.30pm, then bedtime 7.30-8.00pm.

It's been a long road to get to this point though, the amount of times I've battled to get him to sleep for an hour only to give in nearly in tears myself.

It seems to be a case of catching him just at the right moment.

He does generally sleep from 8-7 but not without several wakes ups, coming into bed or at worst being awake for 90 minutes in the middle of the night Sad

Bugaboom · 15/12/2015 17:17

Definitely sounds like it would help zombie. What if you tried a bit earlier than 2? So he isn't overtired? It's so hard when they don't give you any respite in the day as well as being up at night

zombiemeow · 15/12/2015 17:43

I've tired, then he will wriggle and talk away and stuff and I think he is just not tired then he gets over tired with no warnings.

I might try again next week of putting him in his sleeping bag and in his cot. I haven't tried it for a few weeks.

Bugaboom · 15/12/2015 18:10

I should add that I am in no position to offer nap advice. Dd never naps in cot. But she will go down in pushchair or car seat. Trying for an early night for both of mine...

zombiemeow · 15/12/2015 18:16

Good luck bugaboom

20 mins until first wake up here and he's not settling Sad

zombiemeow · 15/12/2015 18:28

So fed up. I spend my day entertaining him because he won't nap, now I'm spending my evenings and nights sat in a dark quiet room listening to him crying if I don't hold him Sad

Pyjamaramadrama · 15/12/2015 18:39

Zombie are you putting him to bed for the night now?

Have you got things round the house to do? Ds often has a few tears at bedtime, I usually potter about doing things like brushing my older ones teeth, loading dishwasher, then I pop back in every 3-4 minutes to let him know I'm there, lay him down and give him his dummy. I find it less intense than sitting there hearing him cry and he usually goes off by the second or third time we go in.

zombiemeow · 15/12/2015 18:45

Yes he just screams for hours if I try that Sad he's back down stairs, my dinner was in the oven and he was hysterical as I tried to put him down again. All my dinner has burnt it was just crap anyway but I haven't eaten since this morning pizza and am so hungry/tired/snotty ergh. Feel a bit better now I've had a moan Smile

He usually goes to bed about 6 as by that time he is too tired to stay awake. He went to bed at 10 to tonight though as he was exhausted. He woke up at 10 past. Just got him on my lap but I know the minute I put him down he will wake up again

Bugaboom · 15/12/2015 18:49

Zombie do you have a sling? Or someone else who could at least hold him while you eat? You need to look after you too x

Pyjamaramadrama · 15/12/2015 18:58

Sorry Zombie I'll stop with the stupid suggestions I know how annoying it is when people offer advice that you've tried over and over Sad I've just realised your baby is one. I'm getting mixed up as I was on 4 month sleep regression thread.