the no-cry sleep solution

[iris66]

has anyone tried it? (book by Elizabeth Pantley) I'm on day 2 & looking for a bit of support as I know it's going to take time. I'm dying through sleep depravation with 8mth DS who bfs to sleep but is very very tricky to move so have been cosleeping whilst he fidgets & kicks all night(and power naps during the day)
Think this is the last chance saloon before ear plugs & leaving him to get hysterical (even though I know that won't happen - i just couldn't, he really does do the whole temper, then sad then hysteria/shaking/terror/I've been abandoned thing - even if DH goes to him - such a mummy's boy)
Anyway, please post if you've been successful with this [hopeful emoticon]

I've brought him to bed last 2 mornings too...feel bit naughty, but book is ok with it. And he sleeps better in the morning in bed with us.

we cosleep fulltime although travelcot was put up lastweek because i felt 'i should' use it!but its full of washing.i keep thinking he might be happier in cot but he is happy,he just likes waking!!!!!!!!

I think the main thing i've worried about with co-sleeping is getting them out once they're in. My SIL slept in MIL's bed until she was in comp!

Also, about an hour before i brought him into bed this morning, there was some sizzling parental action going on...on the off chance of any further action, i'd like him to be in his own room.

LOL.

Well rather and detentiongrrl. My dh has moved out into the spare room again as he just can't cope at work without any proper sleep!

I'm trying to introduce a 'lovey' at the moment. What he really loves is a soft teddy and will smile at it, talk to it, and try and eat it unfortunately I really worry that it is a little too large and it will suffocate him. I'm trying with a smaller and firmer bear but he really does not care for it. Am I worrying unneccesarily? What are your 'loveys' like?

DD2s lovey is a small pink soft rabbit so far she chews it whilst awake, DD1 has her "ninny" which she adores it's a soft blanket with a rabbits head attached with long ears she gets one ear and holds it whilst sucking her thumb, she is very attached to it it's v cute.

Same old story here, quick BF 3 times a night on average, daytime naps horrendous lucky if 30 minutes tops.

For the cosleepers don't worry too much about it DD1 co slept with me from birth but we had to put her in her travel cot at 10 months (she hated bars and we were getting kicked all night) but she came in with us at 6am for BF and a cuddle. At 15 months she went into her own bed in her own room no bother. Felt like giving a huge two fingers to all those people who told me I was creating a rod for my back and she would still be in our bed at 10! I honestly feel sad for a mum whos never woken up with a wee warm baby all snuggled up into them, cosleepings the best. If they weren't so wriggly we would have the four of us all tucked up in the one bed, and before you ask you just go someplace else for relations

Got him back to sleep without picking him up last night...shh'd and patted, (thinking, this won't bloody work) and his eyes went heavy, and off he went for 2 more hours!!!!!!!!!!

Woke 4 times as opposed to 5...of course for this excitement DS will probably be up all tonight now

Hope everyone had a better night - good to hear about your success detentiongrrl.

My dh found a 'sound machine' in the garage that we had been given by the ILs a couple of years ago. It produces sounds such as rainforest, summer rain, and white noise. Well I used it with ds for his daytime naps and it was FANTASTIC!!!! Less intrusive than the hoover, it has a timer on it and a volume control. Last night I decided to use it again. WOW he went back to sleep without being picked up and bf twice out of the four times. Cos it has a volume control I am going to slowly reduce the volume on it until he does not need it any more (fingers crossed). Sorry to sound so excited about my little success - hope everyone else is seeing some progress (however small)

Hi all

fluffyanimal - DS has moved from my drssing gown belt to a teddy (made of the same material) which he seems to associate with sleep now. He actally played in his cot the other night and put himself to sleep (just to show us he can do it!!)

bottomlessburp - the suprise party is on saturday (but I'm not supposed to know ) and it looks like DS may be coming with us if he doesn't settle very soon! My actual birthday's not until the end of the month.

DetentionG - it's great when the shushing/patting works isn't it - I really felt I was starting to make progress when that happened to me

well, DS is sooo full of cold that he can't feed and although the night before last he was in with me and attached all night (or so it seemed) he didn't bf at all yesterday (apart from a quick 5 mins before bed) and even settled to sleep in the afternoon with me cuddling & singing to him!!! He had nothing last night (DH on patrol) and was too bunged up this morning so gave up - He seemed happier with a beaker of formula at brakfast and, as I don't feel exactly full, maybe stress has been affecting my supply. Anyway, he seems happy enough to self wean and I think it's time for me too (and glad the decision is being taken out of my hands tbh) so that's ok.

hope everyone else had reasonable nights

Night from hell last night DD2 was up for an hour and a half and screamed the entire time, usual BFing didn't help she would latch have a few sucks try and roll over to fall asleep then start howling again. I think there was something bothering her as it wasn't her usual cry if you know what I mean. I ended up giving her some Calpol and cuddling her then BF back to sleep seemed to work. Both DP and I are shattered today DD1 slept through it all thankfully.

Iris - is that you had total boob withdrawal now then? I think it's easier when they self wean as you feel like you aren't depriving them of anything. Don't think it will be as easy with DD2 though she's a boob fiend.

Looks like everyone else is having varying degrees of success too which is great to hear.

Sweetkitty - I had a good cry this morning when he wasn't interested (I wanted to keep the morning & evening ones going for a bit). He had a bit of a go to bf to sleep this afternoon but again, couldn't breathe so gave up. I'm going to try to get him to sleep without trying bf tonight. We'll see how it goes

Hello all

Am mid- NCSS which at night is working ok but still frequent wakings but he is sleeping in his cot as he has always done

However, day times naps are currently still a nightmare and I am after some advice.

ds2 is 6 months old, wakes,has breakfast, only food he is not interested in milk (he never has been despite going 7 hours from last feed - he has severe reflux and prefers water ) I leave the house at 8.30 to take ds1 to preschool, mornings only. ds2 therefore sleeps in the pram.

On return, ds1 wakes, has his milk, change nappy, play etc and then gets sleepy again - you guessed it either just as we are about to go out again to retrieve ds1 from preschool so sleeps in pram, or a bit before that and I know that it would take longer than the 20 minutes I have to get him to sleep in the cot. So he sleeps on me, currently whilst I sit on the sofa - I am planning to whip him upstairs so that he sleeps on me in his room and then eventually the cot - who knows!

The problem I have is that he divides his morning nap up to fit round preschool but in the afternoon he sleeps on me in the lounge for 2 hours. This means that I can't really play with ds1 who is 3.5 and who has started to play up to get my attention.

I really want pm nap to be in the cot but I can't leave ds1 alone for the amount of time it takes me to settle ds2 in the cot. Tried the other day and after 45 minutes gave up and had to return dowstairs to make sure ds1 was ok.

Can anyone offer some suggestions of how I can achieve this. My family live too far to help and dh is absoultely fantastic but holiday is scarce and he is unable to really work from home to look after ds1 whilst I deal with ds2.

I am not sure how much more sleep deprivation I can take (ds1 refuses to sleep despite being tired because then he wouldn't have ANY time with me) or how many times my ds1 has to wet himself in order for me to play with him (he has been toilet trained for nearly 1 year and has admitted that he wees on my floor and wets his pants because he wants to be with mummy) I am a SAHM.

Hi hotpot
I'm glad you're having success at night with NCSS(and sorry if you've done this but it generally works for me) have you tried going for a short walk to get DS2 to sleep in the pram for his afternoon nap and leaving him in there whilst you play with DS1?

Hi Iris

Tried leaving him in the pram - no joy and can't walk with him because ds1 is too tired. Even with the buggy board on the back of the pram so he can ride along.

Technically ds1 should nap but refuses, he has major meltdowns by 4pm, he just wants his mummy and I do miss just being with him, and him alone.

Hotpot - what techniques are you trying to get DS2 to sleep? Could DS2 sleep downstairs in the pram for his pm nap? Sorry no answers I am struggling myself but hope someone has more suggestions

iris66 - so sorry to hear you're feeling sad.

sweetkitty - sounds like your lo is not well, so hopefully things will improve again once things are better.

Had a terrible day for naps today so will see what the night has to offer. Fingerscrossed for you all....

hotpot I can totally sympathise with you on this one daytime naps are horrendous for us too

I BF DD2 downstairs until she is asleep then carry her up to her cot more often than not she wakes or if she doesn't will only have about 30 minutes then wake up, I can't do the ncss thing as I have 2.4yo DD1 downstairs. She is potty training right now and has sussed if she says Mummy I need a pee-pee Mummy drops everything and takes her to the toilet. She refuses to go on her own and she is still very young. She also refuses a nap in the afternoon most of the time so by 5pm dinnertime I have two very crabby babies I get so down as I feel DD2 gets nowhere near the sleep she should (30 min nap for a 10 month old all day).

Sorry I don't know what to suggest either

hotpot,sounds tough!no suggestions im afraid but lots os sympathy.
iris,hope you feel a little happier soon-big hug!
sweetkitty-is lo still poorly?my lo had 1 day of really high temp etc but is ok now.
lastnight was as follows-bed at 7pm,up 6 times between then and 4am had sips of water,shhing and back to sleep,then dd and ds1 were both up,ds1 was sick,dd thought it was wake up time!got them all resettled until ds2 woke again at 6am.ask dh to get up,he got stroppy!didnt hear a sound lastnight though!its suppose to be me,whos not sleeping thats stroppy!anyway ended up being 'allowed' to have sleep till 7am!now ds wont nap.with us its not so much amount of time hes awake but amount of times he wakes and naps.somedays naps are excellant but somedays not!

Thank you to all for your suggestions, might try either carrying to bed whilst asleep - sneaky or if that fails will resort to pram

I wheel him in the pram into the garage and then into the house through the utility and finally into the kitchen. I have steps to the front door and can't get him in the back door due to step too. My wonderful dh had to make me a ramp to get up the step from the garage to the utility.

So am happy to wheel him into lounge although may have to clean wheels as I have beige carpet

Am going out tomorrow to buy two of the same toys so I can sleep with them and make a lovely. Don't want to lose one and not be able to replace. I will probably end up with loads!!!

Blimey, hugs all round. Hello hotpot, and much sympathy to you - I don't know how anyone copes with more than one child if they haven't got one of those fantastically easy babies (you know, the ones that only other people ever have). I carried ds to his cot asleep for naps for ages, and it worked for us. And I've also wheeled the pram into the beige carpeted lounge to avoid waking him before now!

I thought I was loosing it this week - so tired now. Amazing how things seem worse once you try to take charge and change things, rather than just getting on with it...

I was actually at breaking point Monday, did almost totally lose the plot.

Although night times are going well, he still wakes frequently and dh is fantastic but can't do it all - (he gives me lots of breaks) but both boys now have colds so they can't breathe when lay down. Joy

I am just run ragged, makes me appreciate how fab ds1 was in the fact that he slept from 7 - 7 with one feed from 9 wks and still to this day sleeps 12 hours (he is 3.5)

Definitely NO MORE children, dh having snip.

Good luck to all, hope your wee ones sleep well tonight and every night from here on!!!!

Not too bad a night last night 11pm had a whinge quick BF back to sleep, then 5am and up at 7am.

hotpot - I know what you mean I had dream baby the first time I felt so smug I fell pregnant again when she was 9 months mmm should have known better, although DD2 is "better" at other things than DD1 so I suppose you shouldn't compare them.

moljam - your night sounds awful poor you

here's hoping we all have a good night tonight x

Good Lord, I feel quite alert this morning. 4 wake ups between 7pm and 5.45 am for DS. Brought him to bed 3am cos he felt cold and i couldn't be arsed getting back up again. There's nothing nicer than being woken by a grinning baby slapping you in the face

Re: naps- mine usually refuses the be put down once he's dropped off, so i've given up trying. I just sit with him sleeping in my arms for an hour...it's worth it for the much less grumpiness come bedtime! Got him to take 2 decent naps a day now.

Hello everyone and greetings from Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia... I am 8 hours ahead of you so while i am at work i am thinking of all of you struggling to get some sleep... think of me trying to make my baby sleep tomorrow when you are awake! I have also bought the book and is trying it out.... with mixed success... it's good to know others who are doing the same thing!

hee hee... i am new to this, so please excuse me, i forgot to introduce myself... i have a seven month old dd. a couple of months back she was down to only one awakening at 3am, then she's up at 6am... and then it suddenly changed and she is now all over the place... some nights three or four times, some nights even more... helllllllllllllppppppppppp.... my dh is still worried that she is hungry and needs the milk but all my research tells me otherwise... so i am needing the company of like-minded mums to help me get thru this! i mean, well, she probably does feel hungry when she wakes up but then how long can i keep doing this right??

sashasmama ,welcome!my ds slept brilliantly till 7 months then stopped!i even remember telling someone he was boring because he slept so much!if i could turn back time......LOL!hes now 11 months.
lastnight i put him in cot for first time in ages,just to try and he only woke once!he had sip of water and went straight back to sleep till 5.30.i then put him in bed and we had cuddle and bottle till6 and got up to eat!so 7pm -5.30am with one waking!!!!!!yippee!maybe he wants his own space,maybe i ve been waking him !hes napping in bed at the moment but i will try cot again tonight!i missed him loads lastnight and woke wondering where he was!but if cot works then cot it is!