Misery loves company: riding the mo fo out into Part II

[ElphabaTheGreen]

In our last exciting instalments:

Needles was at breaking point with a screaming 10 mo DD

Hear had experienced the magic of ONE unbroken night!

Dreaming was continuing to confound all with her ability to manage three children on four or five minutes a night, thanks to DT the Terrible.

Stitch was still having her sleep eaten by...erm...Stitch.

Poppy was pondering how the actual fark she was going to manage a newborn on top of BabyAmex's night time shenanigans.

And the desperate Elphaba had turned night duties entirely over to DH with mastitic results.

Join us with your stories of misery and woe in this, the most sleep-deprived corner of MN!

Oh wow elph . Urgently need the update. How was the night?! That sounds great. I hope you'll inspire me to sort our godawful bedtimes... If not the night. Ann sounds good.

Haven't updated because I'm too afraid to break the first rule of sleep club and jinx everything...

He's woken up two, maybe three, times the past two nights, sat up and looked at me on the floor, I've said 'Shh' and he's gone back to sleep within five seconds. Also went to sleep quite easily, with no tantrums, in his own bed last night.

Flipping heck elph that's amazing!!! Long may it last. It will last, its 250 of good advice not a flash in the pan solution. Fact.

In fact, I'm now really tempted to contact her, but worried I couldn't carry out the whole programme. Dt the T's room is titchy tiny. We would seriously not all be able to fit in it to play. Unless we all got on the bed to read together in the day. Except we wouldn't, the dts would bounce, wrestle and rough play. I'd try to keep dd interested. Then she'd join in. Then someone would get hurt. Then I'd try really hard, and sometimes succeed and sometimes not, to not get really irritated. This is what happens while i get dressed if I've not done it pre 7am wake-up for the other two (rare nowadays!) . And the bedtime is hard as Dt the Not So Angelic will only let me put him to bed. I have a little whisper with him in the rocking chair about his day and what he's done, rock him a bit, tell him how lovely he is- then when I ask if he's ready to go in his cot he'll say 'yes'. Asks me to wait at the door (well, imperious command of "door!") And that's it. I stay a few min, job done. No problem with that. Except Dt the T will also only have me. And Dh basically keeps him quiet reading him 122,468 books while i do Dt2. Dd is a dream- finishes her books, into bed, give her a kiss, she lies quietly through the boys palaver... I really, really don't know where to start. I'm happy with what I do with Dt2, just that it doesn't work with t'other and we finish bedtime after 8pm (start 6:30pm)

Oh, and my measly bit of success story is the bottle in bed then second go at teeth for Dt the T is over, now its stories, scream and back arch like a Russian gymnast, wrestled onto the bed, tell him he's lovely while trying to mean it when he's calm, after say 5 min, move to floor, hold his hand. He demands I get back into bed and cuddle, I lean in and cuddle, soothe him enough til I can kneel by bed holding his hand til he falls asleep. Whole thing 20-40 min, depending on his mood etc. Not loving it.

7:40pm-7:10am, own bed, no wake-ups.

I'm sure she's got adaptations for coping with multiples and small bedrooms Dreaming.

That said, we'll wait a few more weeks to see if effects seem to be lasting. I'm with her until the beginning of April so we've got plenty of time yet.

I've been lurking on this thread forever and I have to say fellow Elphaba, you have just got this sleep consultant a lot of business.

We have a lurker with an awesome name!

elph!!! You can't pop in and not tell us how Saturday night went. Did he sleep through again. One hour + of hell with overtired DT the T tonight he really is a little horror, if I ever e-Bayed one, I'd need 0.0001 seconds to decide who

Hello elphaba the Lurker. Do feel free to de-lurk more often. I am also seriously considering this Ann the Miracle worker, I've been perusing her website...

Slept through in his own bed Friday, Saturday AND last night. Bed time is still a little bit of a tussle (nothing dramatic, he's just up and down a bit) but this face is not bovvered. And we haven't had a nanosecond of crying or tantrums in the whole process.

I've still been on his floor on an air mattress through all this. I've got another chat with Ann today, after which I think I will get to sleep in my own bed tonight for the first time in over two months. I might even get to wake up next to my husband.

Yep, get to sleep in my own bed!

Next step with DS is I now get further away from him at bedtime - carrying on with gradual withdrawal, basically. Twist on the variation, however, is that I sit there holding a stuffed toy, with the theory that he associates stuffed toy with me, and is eventually happy just seeing stuffed toy if he wakes up in the night or is going to sleep.

DH also needs to start playing more with DS 1:1 in his room as well so the bedtime routine is not solely up to me.

Hope I continue to be able to post happy updates!

Wow oh wow of wowness! Elph this is amazing stuff. Have you told the magical Ann that she is getting some cracking promotion on mumsnet? She should give you a discount :o

Also, very excited we have a lurker of our very own. I feel I should write something meaningful and ermmmm ... well, you know...

Anyway, after a couple of days of general stressness dd seems to have pretty much settled into the new place and sleep is about as crappy as usual but no worse, which is something. In all our wisdom we have decided to go for dummy removal over sleep sorting. I am not absolutely sure how this decision got made. I think dh might have caught me in a moment of sleep deprived compliance when I agreed to this plan

So the plan is now no dummy during the day with a view to complete withdrawal of the D after her birthday on sunday. So far no dummy during the day is going ok, she even managed a nap without it at nursery today (see how I get my money's worth by making nursery do the first 2 dummy free naps...is that bad of me?). I am rather dreading the night without it though, especially since we now have neighbours. Sort of thinking maybe we should have done this when we lived in a completely detached place. Oh well.

Sounds very positive all round. I can rouse a rather feeble and jealous hurrah. I'm going to slope off now because I'm so grumpy. And feeling guilty for having lost my temper with Dt the T at bedtime (after nearly an hour) & shouting at him :( . Made it all worse, natch. Bedtime is getting worse here, day by day. Honestly, all that's left is to talk Dh into paying for Ann. He remains unconvinced. I am. Finally, after nearly two years, his reflux is under control. He has stopped vomiting - except when dd fed him cheese last week. He is finally, finally in a place where I feel we can Do Something properly about his sleep. Come on Dh, get on board!! (He thinks ours is the ultimate sleep resisting child

He did it! 7:50 til 6:10 in his own bed without me there with no wake ups!

Keep working on your DH Dreaming. No idea yet whether these results will be lasting, but the fact that DS now climbs into his own bed (albeit climbs out again and needs putting back in again a few times before he falls asleep) then wakes up happy (!!!) in his own bed is very promising. And the to-ing and fro-ing at bedtime is totally calm and silent. Unbelievable.

Jesus elph, this is amazing! Maybe I need to spend the money I was going to do the kitchen with on the magical Ann. Dd's been super during the day without dummy but then last night we realised we had hidden them a little too well and couldn't find one anywhere. Result: hours of screaming until we found one.

At least it convinced dh that she is not ready to completely give it up just yet. I am hoping we can continue with no dummy during the day for a while and instead deal with bedtime a bit.

Just to make you all feel better, DS had two wake ups last night (it's night 7 in his own room, and Ann said there'd probably be a bit of a regression about now). Woke up at 3:30 - had a bit of a wail when I put him back in his bed but was fast asleep again in about 5 mins. Woke up again at 5:50. In the old days, I probably would have just got up with him, but his GroClock was still showing night time and Ann said to treat any wake ups before 6am as night wakings. Another wail when I put him back in bed, but was, miraculously, asleep really quickly. Very lightly, mind, so I couldn't actually move from my position at the wall opposite his bed without him waking, but he slept for another 20 minutes, getting him past the 6am mark. We took him in bed for a cuddle and he made no attempts to go back to sleep so he was obviously 'cooked'.

Hear - £250 would only make a tiny dent in a new kitchen. Buy some sleep and DH cuddles instead!

Oh, and as of sometime around 2 August, DS will become DS1 as he'll be getting a little brother Dear God, I hope this one has sleep genes...

For £250 I could remove the black stipple effect tiling! You haven't seen them! Its a difficult choice I can tell you.

Dear god, 250, well worth it for the sleep!!!! Ffs Dh, get with the programme

You back at work now elph? Congratulations on another boy!! Second time round will be a piece of piss
Back asleep, own bed, 5 mins sounds good to me though.

My last day at work tomorrow, then I'm a sahm!!! Might try for one day a week private work though, with a company two colleagues work for

I'm back to work on Friday. I'd like to feel better than I do, but I think this is it for me now - staying home and watching more back to back episodes of Glee is really not going to make a difference now, I don't think. DS2 is proving to be more trouble as a foetus than DS1 (who was a doddle - I was healthy as a horse), which clearly means he's going to be the exact opposite of Velcro-baby, high-needs, never-shall-sleep DS1

DS got out of bed only once at bedtime tonight. Tomorrow night, I relocate to the door as he's going to sleep. Everything crossed for a return to uninterrupted nights...

Lurking but not writing-promise I'll do it soon… either knackered or busy.

Elph applause for Ann and congrats on getting the sleep sorted

did I just read that you're having another male monkey

Hi all!

Elphaba it all sounds amazing! Do you feel much better? Are you allowing yourself to be more positive? Congrats on the boy news. I have heard that research shows that boys need more in infancy, more cuddles etc, something to do with testosterone. At least that's my excuse!

Hear, is the dummy causing massive problems at night, is that why you are ditching it?

Dreaming, you should go to ann, then if she works for you she is officially magic and then we can all go to her!

Mixed hear, twin two most nights only wakes once which is lovely! Twin one wakes every one to two hours and screams if I don't put the boob in his mouth! Need a poll, should I try and do something about it? He is eight months? Or just accept it and co. Sleep a bit? Can decide if I should try and tackle it before it gets worse or whether I should just wait to see if he grows out of it? I think I will get less sleep if I try and tackle it, but might be worth it for long term gain. I wonder what magic ann would recommend!

Hope all ok

Bees xx

Hi best, she does tend to lose the dummy and then wake up and it is a right pain in the bum trying to find the darn thing. I think dh's main thing though was getting rid during the day is it was starting to slur her speech. I think he figured that as she seems fine during the day without it wouldn't be an issue getting rid at night too. No such luck!

Personally at 8 months I was still firmly in the rid that mo fo out camp. I didn't stop bf until 18 months (when she gave up with no problems as all). I would go for cosleeping at that age but then I only have one and knit my own muesli for fun.

Dd has now got herself a blooming cough to add to her reasons for waking. Joy!

Hmm, tricky one bees at 8 months my dts were like yours. Dt2 woke 1-2 times, maybe slightly more. Dt1/ Dt the T woke every 90 min to 2 hours. Or more on a bad night. I tried drawing out feeds. I tried replacing in the cot. Dh still regularly took them away at 3-4am and walked them in the buggy when I lost all sense of reason. Nothing worked. Mind, the frequent waker still had undiagnosed, untreated reflux and was regularly given dairy to eat. Cheese blocks FFS! no wonder nothing worked. Dt2 actually probably wasn't great then, but with him, I rode the mo fo out and he started sleeping through around 12 months old. In fact, and now, may be gods of sleep wrath leave me be, I re-announce him as Dt The Angelic. He's sleeping through again, and has done for five nights and going to bed nicely for me please, please don't change because I wrote this on mn

Anyway, despite him sleeping well, the hell child isn't so I'd best head to bed. Campaign Buy Some Sleep on full throttle. I shall win this one :)

He might have just taken The Menace in.the single buggy sometimes. Or sometimes taken both just in.case t'other ruined my hours peace.. I was going bananas then bees . It'll get better!! Dt the T has actually come so far, just so have my expectations :)

Where are you all? Sleeping all night long?

Yes, Dreaming, with matchsticks in the eyes
DS is a techie geek and goes bonkers when he sees any electronic devices so no writing when he's around and in the evening when he goes to bed i'm too knackered, add pregnancy brain ( or lack of it) and you've got an answer for my silence. Will try to write soon, promizzzz....