4 month sleep regression- light at the end of the tunnel

[nearlymumofone]

I posted here a while back about the hell i was goig through with the 4 month sleep regression. And it really was hell. However I've been meaning to post here to let anyone going through it know there is light at the end of the tunnel. DS hit it at 16 weeks, and it lasted till 6 months, with the worst weeks being form 16-20 weeks. I was EBF at the time and I think this actually didn't help the sleep sitruation, at 5 months i introduced solids and a bottle, he was established on solids by 6 months and ff and slept through the night without waking. I can't tell whether the formula or solids helped, whether it was either or both, but his sleeping well coincided with him being well satisfied and full (he was very poor at bf and not gaining weight so it wasn't going well at hence i gave in at 5 months). We also introduced a blankie which was a godsend and put him in his own room. All of which seemed to positively contribute to him sleeping well. Maybe the regression would have passed without us doing these things, however they seemed to work well for us. Now DS is 9 months and unless he's ill/teething sleeps through the night (from 6.30-6.30 ish).

I just wanted to give hope to anyone going through it at the minute that it will get better.

Muser that's great news! What a long stretch, you must be over the moon!
The last 5 nights have been much better, relatively. He's still waking every 1.5-2 hours though, so we're not back to the 5 hours we used to have. Hopefully things will carry on getting better slowly.
DS has his immunisations today so that may help him sleep more, we'll see!

Over the moon and half way to the other side of the universe! She was asleep when I posted that and woke up at 7.40am. It was brilliant. I'm sure there's still bad nights ahead, but it gives such hope. Especially as yesterday was such a standard day. The other two good nights last week were after big exciting days out. Yesterday was a standard day of nap struggles, long lunch with NCT group, wriggling on playmat and CBeebies! And we'd had a decentish night the night before too.

I hope everyone starts seeing progress soon. A good night's sleep for all!

That is such good news ladies!

I don't know if this is of help, but i bought a very comfy pillow for Jack (4mo) and he slept in his cot!!! He woke up a few times but it was such a difference! The good thing is that he quite liked sleeping on his side! So, he might get used to it and sleep longer!!!! The pillow is called www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B001O83F7C/ref=oss_product and i bought it from Amazon!!! It is soooo nice!!!

Anyway, i thought it would be nice to share it!

Have a lovely morning all!

Can I take Muser's place please? My dd was doing really well sleeping (5/6/7/8 and then 10 hour stretches!) until she was 11 weeks old when she started only going 3 or 4 hours with the odd really disturbed night thrown in. Since monday however she has not wanted to settle in her cot as easily as she did, sleeping for only 1-2.5hr stretches. Sometimes she is hungry, sometimes she just comfort sucks (she's ebf). We came back from a weekend away on Monday which might explain it, but she also turned the dreaded 16 weeks yesterday. I'm prepared to ride it out (any other choice? :) ) but you know what they say, misery likes company, so thought i'd join in here!

Hi all, not had time to catch up, had my parents up. Things have got worse again and I think we've gone back to square one. Not happy. Losing the will to live now.

Just seen Muser's excellent progress! That's fantastic!

Will go and read the rest of the thread now. Hope things aren't too bad :)

Welcome Belly. Hope your stay isn't too long!

Get the pillow ladies!!! It works!!!

Mine sleeps on her front now so I don't think a pillow would help. I knew she was going to be a front sleeper from when she was born. Sure enough, as soon as she could roll over she was straight on her tummy.

Welcome AllBelly, I'm not quite ready to give my place up yet as last night may have been a fluke. But there's always room for one more.

Ooh Muser that is fantastic! Sounds like progress is being made anyway. Nice to hear as well that you too have a hardcore nap refuser. I mean not great for you obviously but it is a relief to hear that we aren't the only one. Actually she is napping right now on me, but there was protests getting her there. Oh it must be wonderful to see your baby getting sleepy, scoop them up, and pop them in their cot whilst you eat chocolate and go on MN catch up with the chores. My only consolation is that all the walking we do to get her to sleep in the sling must be good for me.
Bet it made me chuckle to read you saying that things are improving as he is now waking every couple of hours. I bet you never thought that you would consider that a good night once upon a time! I so get what you mean though- it's funny how your expectations become lower and lower as far as sleep is concerned. I sometimes wonder if I just imagined that mine used to sleep for a good five hour chunk at the start of the night. It feels like a very distant memory...
Someone recommended a dummy to help with naps? I have seriously considered it but having got so far without one I am a bit reluctant to introduce one. She does suck her thumb which can help, trouble is it relies on her doing it herself. She doesn't like being 'helped' as I have discovered!
Welcome belly, hope you don't have to stay too long. But my DD is six months so I think we are not so much in a four month regression but just officially rubbish at sleeping.

dorcas It was me who suggested the dummy. I can understand your reluctance - you have done well the get this far. If she prefers finding her own thumb if probably wouldn't work anyway.

muser good news on your sleep. It's not fair that when bfing you still wake up with sore boobs!

Welcome belly least you know your DD can sleep. Hopefully she will go back to those long stretches soon.

We had jabs today and DD is currently sleeping off the stress. She has been unsettled last couple of jabs night so not expecting much tonight.

Dorcas, I know, who would have thought my standards would get so low! They weren't that high to begin with really, lots of DCs on this thread seem to have slept way longer than 5 hours. But maybe that's worse, to be used to a nice long sleep and then have it taken away?
Haloflo DS has also just had his jabs today and a dose of Calpol and is currently at 1.5 hours in to monster nap. Calpol definitely helps him, but I hate to see the nurse sticking needles in his little legs! (well, massive legs actually, he gets stuck in his Bumbo!)

Thanks for the welcomes everyone.
Muser think positively, waking up with sore boobs is a fantastic sign, I'm envious :)

Haloflo It's true that I know she can sleep, I think it makes it even more frustrating for me! She can also self settle at night but won't do it every night. I also don't have problems getting her to nap during the day as long as she is in her stretchy sling and I bounce around the kitchen singing along to my cds for 20-30 minutes. Try anything else and she cries her little eyes out, real proper tears and everything, for as long as it takes me to get her in the sling and start bouncing :)

I could have it worse but it used to be better... I think the worse things are my baby being the only one who is regressing (from nct group) and that everyone (mum, MIL, SIL) is trying to get me to introduce formula or baby rice to miraculously solve the problem.

Forgot to say hi to Belly. ignore comments about formula and solids, DS sometimes has a bottle of formula if his daddy is looking after him and it makes bugger all difference. Time is the only solution, IMHO, but unfortunately we're on week 7 now!

Just sat with DD after her bath and feed for over an hour and a half, put her down in her cot and she woke up. Tried soothing her back to sleep but didn't work so back to sitting in a darkened room nursing her back to sleep, for god knows how long. I just want to have a bit of time to myself before I go to bed and a chance to get something to eat. My DP works late so is never here in the evening and won't be back till midnight. I feel like I am losing the plot. I feel hungry, lonely and fed up and don't know what to do . Sorry for the whinge, but need to get it out.

Oh Dorcas, I wish there was something I could do, it does sound like you need help. I know I go crazy when my DH works late every so often, to be doing it on my own night after night would have broken me. Is there anyone who can give you a bit of a break?

Dorcas, sorry you're having a crap evening. I guess your DC doesn't usually feed that long? Maybe it's to do with growth spurt stuff. When my DP is working late I can't cook either as DS is literally always with me. If he's napping I'm napping too, as he wakes up if on his own. And he only goes to bed with us at 9.30-ish, so I have no eves or naps to myself ever. It gets a bit wearing doesn't it? I use the lack of cooking thing as an excuse to have pretzels and chocolate for dinner though. I hope your DP gives you some free time on the weekends, you deserve it.

Big hugs to Dorcas. How awful.

We are having a variable time of it. Two nights ago was crap. Last night was OK - she only wanted feeding twice (at least, I always assume she wants feeding at 4am) and although she woke at 2 and 2.20 she settled herself back to sleep within a few minutes. Marvellous. Interestingly, she didn't appear to roll over at all last night - I had hoped it was in fact that she'd learned to roll back onto her back, but since she has got stuck on her tummy twice already tonight I guess not!

Fingers crossed we all get a few hours kip... DD now has a cold, which makes it all very unlikely :(

No Muser there's noone else. I think I do feel a bit broken tonight...
Bet I don't think it's a growth spurt as I don't think she woke to feed. It's just that feeding is the best way to get her back to sleep. Its just that she doesn't want to be in the cot, she wants to be on me. It's like having a newborn again! Only at least then I could just bed down in front of the telly with the biscuit tin. I stopped doing that because she was getting too distracted to go to sleep but maybe for the sake of my sanity I should go back to that and hope this a phase we can ride out?
Thanks for replying, I was feeling very teary and it has made me feel a bit less alone.

Thanks Fifi, and hurray for last night. Hope tonight is good too- for all of us! (Although clearly the signs are not looking good for me...)

Hi all
My son is 19 weeks and a week ago started very similar bedtime awfulness. He is ebf and would go to sleep quite well after his bedtime routine, but then a fateful week ago the routine no longer worked.
On the bright side, once he is asleep, he (so far, touch every piece of wood I have access to) stays asleep for about 7-10 hours, and bizarrely enough, when he does wake up I feed him and the majority of the time he will go back to sleep by himself.
His daytime naps are starting to get a bit messed up too which is not helping matters, and I am going insane! If anyone has any tips for keeping my brain from unraveling or helping my son get to sleep then I would be massively grateful!
I know it will eventually pass, just I am not sure I will still be in my right mind by the time it does!

Well, last night was not fun at all. Could not put her down in the cot at all and am ashamed to say I ended up crying . Now feel like a rubbish mum for letting it all get on top of me. When my DP eventually came home he took her, put her in the cot... and she stayed asleep! Which obviously I was happy about but part of me was a bit pissed off as I had been trying and failing to do it all evening. I just do not get it. She then stayed asleep till about two and then came in with us and slept till half six with a few wakings for feeding which I only vaguely recall. I was so knackered I think I barely woke up. So the nights feel a bit more manageable now we're co-sleeping, but my evenings are totally screwed!
bet that's interesting that you always have your little one with you. My DD is always with me, during the day, for naps etc, now all night now we're co-sleeping. Perhaps she is objecting to being separated in the evening too and I should just go with the flow rather than battle on like this. The thing is I used to just have her on me all evening when she was newborn but she started to fall asleep earlier and earlier and I only started putting her in her cot because I thought she would get a better sleep. Do you have her downstairs with you?

Sorry bet I mean him, you have a DS not a DD!
And welcome titihood!

And when I say downstairs I mean in the living room etc, ie not in the bedroom where it is less stimulating. As I worry that if I go back to just keeping her with me all evening she'll get overstimulated, won't sleep and have a meltdown! God it is bloody hard work having a baby, it worries me how utterly clueless I am!
And sorry for the cluster post!

Dorcas, yes DS stays with me watching telly until bed at about 9.30-ish. Like you, it's a habit that's carried through from when he was a newborn and would cluster feed for hours in the evenings. He lies on his bf pillow and snacks on and off. We have had a couple of nights where he's been overtired as got distracted by the telly but I keep the sound off and use the subtitles now, and DP and I talk very quietly!
I don't get any evenings to myself but it doesn't bother me that much because mostly DP is there too. I don't think I'd be so ok with it if I was by myself.
I've started to want to change things as DS is getting tired earlier (about 9pm) which is too early for my bedtime. At the moment I leave him sleep on my lap and take him to bed later, but it's not ideal.
It does sound like your DC wants to go back to sleeping on you at the moment, and tbh I'd go with whatever gave me most rest. They change so often that I don't think you'd set up bad habits.
By the way, DS slept quite a bit better last night: bed at 10, woke at 11.15, 1.30, 4.30, 6 and 7.15. Not bad for him!

Also forgot to say Dorcas you're not clueless, you're trying to listen to your baby which is a really good thing! Better than reading baby books til you're blue in the face then worrying why your DC isn't sleeping 12 hours and on a 2 hour nap routine!

Dorcas Don't be ashamed/guilty for crying, I've succumbed to that on more than a few occasions. I've also left the room so that I can have an angry shout. I've never been known for my patience so having a baby can really test me at times and, whilst I hate that I don't always cope with things very well, I just remind myself that I'm learning how to be mum and every day I need to learn something new.

As for your baby wanting to be with you, I agree with what others have said, if it makes life easier for you in terms of sleep then just go with it. It won't be forever. I say that, but every day I wonder when my dd will fall asleep for her naps somewhere other than on me :)

By the way, I'm sure people have tried this but I only realised my dd can self settle at night because I walked away from her one evening when I was particularly tired and getting frustrated with her not sleeping. She wasn't crying, just lying in her cot looking around so I put her mobile on and left the room to take a break. I had the monitor on so I could go back as soon as she sounded upset but it just didn't happen, after about 20 mins of happily burbling to the animals on her mobile she just fell asleep. She's done it about 7 or 8 times since. BUT, she has to be in the right mood to do it.