So, MNHQ, bedecked in LKBennett (and Boden for the plebs) are all out stuffing pizza and Bolly, half of the posters and hangers-on are there too: what mischief shall we get up to while they're away?

[WilfSell]

Because I bet they've just left BigTech in charge. Or he/she'll be checking in every once in a while, a bit pished and lairy.

So we can DO. WHAT. WE. LIKE. while the Leaders party.

I have seen more separates. Some of the choices really don't go. I think Gok had a point.

'Jolly' Such a great word, my MIL uses it a lot

Norty wilf!
Johnnie is here...and ed miliband...

Gok cornered me over by the fire exit. He has persuaded me to try something new.

Is it really in what appears to be a conference room?

I have just popped outside for a fag and shared a joint with Carrie and two journalists from The Grauniad. But they told me not to say.

That eye is weird! I thought NFI meant Not Fuckin Interested. I'm obviously a bit more sweary than you guys saying Not Flippin Invited

Ed Miliband is known to be a bit free with his embraces.

Is Gok doing his "Oh yes I really am gay!" line whilst looking up womens' skirts?

I didn't realise Boden was all flowery curtains prints, just as well I didn't win then, I wouldn't suit that AT ALL. I'd have to rip it and put safety pins in and bits of newspaper just to make it more edgy.

I would be gozzling the champers though and grabbing strange men to tell them what side their cock is lying on. It's a cool game, you look at a man's crotch and try to guess which side their cock is on. Then you tell them to see if you're right! Course sometimes I have to have a bit of a feel just to make absolutely sure they're not lying

I wonder why I didn't win?

I actually have tears in my eyes YMT, that was v scary and I feel sick too

ah shit forgot to do in the style of Caitlin Moran

Ahem, MamaG, you and me need to have a word

MamaG I NEED A WORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I Googled, arrgggggggggggggggggggggggg I now feel sick!

Oi wait your turn you, she's pretending to be me! (what did you Google, by the way?!)

Blue Waffle [boak]

She is an evil woman.

And DONT DONT do it!

(But you just no you will just like I did)

Will hold your hair for you NFI, but please dont hit my shoes.

I Am in the toilet

annabel carmel is smaller than a playmobile lady

Is gully really here

nit in my cubicle ibviosly

I think I will resist, thanks

Have you been partaking of too much free champagne by any chance, MP?

a nit in the cubicle? I expected better of Google...

MP, which cubicle you in? if you find my stash mate, hang on it for me will you?...packet of Drum rolled up with a band. Carrie nicked me rizlas and some bloke in a suit'll sort you out with some business cards you can use as a roach

Oh god why did I look at the blue waffle.

ROFL at you all iphoning from the bogs.

JUST WHIP EM OUT AT THE PARTY. Everyone else who is a MNer will know and understand.

I must log out of work twitter now which I've been doing all evening, and rejoin as Wilf.

PS will there be a party bag? Can I have a balloon?

MP she is in a corner wearing BOden/separates/LBD with suspicious white powder round her nose, possibly.

When does the karoake start?

I want a party bag!

[wail]