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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

What do you do when you think someone is taking the piss

245 replies

FabulousBakerGirl · 08/06/2009 17:29

apart from emailing MNHQ?

OP posts:
psychomum5 · 09/06/2009 13:41

ah, but justine, sometimes you just don;t realise you can;t afford it until afterwards.

Original poster
FabulousBakerGirl · 09/06/2009 13:43

psycho - if you want to talk mums, start a thread. Your call.

OP posts:
Rhubarb · 09/06/2009 13:47

Perhaps Justine, on the top of all threads on relationships, mental health and the like you could put a warning as you do on others, something like:

"Due to the sensitive nature of some of these topics, can we remind all Mumsnetters not to arrange to meet anyone, or to give out any personal details. All posters should be treated as genuine, but if you have any concerns please do click on the red exclamation at the far right."

That should be enough to remind people to take a step back. It's always too easy to become wrapped up in someone's story and forget your own personal safety.

Original poster
FabulousBakerGirl · 09/06/2009 13:50

I agree.

OP posts:
BitOfFun · 09/06/2009 13:56

By SomeGuy on Tue 09-Jun-09 13:47:00
The OP has apparently managed to permanently separate from her husband, and had him locked up until trial, so I wouldn't worry too much.

I'd be more concerned about the fact that she has lost at least one child during the course of this thread, and that the police are not following the law and are simply locking people up without bail hearings.

hellsbelles · 09/06/2009 14:01

I'm pretty new on MN but came across the thread you are talking about and it seemed very familiar in style to another one I read recently - the weird way the original poster kept coming back into the conversation. It's so sad that someone feels the need to dupe others into helping them...but I guess as a few others have said - if it's genuine then it's great they are getting the support on MN that they need...and if it's not genuine - they are still obviously in need of help - no normal person would resort to that surely?

FelineFine · 09/06/2009 14:08

This does not happen where I live. Perhaps if someone had beat the shit out of me they would go away for the night but they would be out in the morning.

Believe me I have tried to have people locked up, it's not easy.

To stop them coming back to the house they have lived in, they have to physically assault you twice and you would have to record that with the police before the court would even think about granting an interdict to stop them coming back.

Emotional abuse does not cut it.

Thought I would share that with you.

Rhubarb · 09/06/2009 14:08

Yes hellsbells, I should imagine that they do need help. Anyone who makes up such a scenario is obviously lacking in something. I guess for a moment, a brief moment, they know how it feels to have a community care about them, to be the focus of attention. If that's what they crave then you have to feel sorry for them.

BitOfFun · 09/06/2009 14:18

I wonder if MNHQ ever pull a thread on the grounds that it is ludicrously implausible, or do they have to recognize the IP address as belonging to somebody dodgy? Genuinely curious.

BalloonSlayer · 09/06/2009 14:40

Trillian/Psycho re the "voice" thing, I think it's easier if you know a poster very well to recognise their style.

I did a search for CVQs posts and they have all gone. But there are a few for the other names Psycho mentioned, and I can see the similarities psycho saw. I only did this for research purposes after reading this thread btw.

SomeGuy · 09/06/2009 14:45

BTW, there are several references to children in the first half of the thread, it later changes to a single son.

Q. Do you have DCs, SlightlyPaniced?

SP. Yes, asleep still thankgod. I'm shaken up more than badly hurt I think

Q. Has he ever done anything like that to your DCs, or just to you?

SP. Only me, he's a good dad for what it's worthI just don't know what to do anymore

SP. This is useless. I can't go anywhere else to phone because the dc are asleep

SP. Yeslife would be relaxed for me, but how can I remove daddy from the childrens life

24 minutes later, children become child:

SP. Sometimes it will be a few hours before he comes back, sometimes it will be the next day. I never really know, and now my ds is crying, I need to go to him.

SP I can't just go right now he has ds with himI can't get away right now

but then there is another DC post here:

SP. He came back, sorry I had to close down and do history quickly. Things are ok, he's taken dc to the park for now I think things are ok.

subsequently reverts to ds

SP I'm totally terrified of him coming after me or getting our ds and yes I think I need more time. Please I am doing my best, you're all helping me sort through some stuff in my head. This is new to me, I don't talk about my homelife

psychomum5 · 09/06/2009 14:49

balloonslayer, she was very clever, posted mainly in chat, which as we all know goes after 90 days

the last couple of main threads for her were in mental health tho, you might find some there

NationalFlight · 09/06/2009 16:03

Someguy they might have had one child together and another from her previous relationship - so based on just those quotes it doesn't really fall into the definite camp. However based on loads of other things it does, imo..

BalloonSlayer · 09/06/2009 16:28

Oh another thing about recognising a "voice" - I used to go on another site and there was a prominent poster there whom I recognised instantly on here.

Partly it was the things she said, but what struck me more was the style. The "voice" was unmistakeable, although I'd be unable to describe it to you. There was nothing sinister in this BTW, just different forums, different nicknames.

psychomum5 · 09/06/2009 16:50

balloonslayer, did you tell the poster on the other forum that you recognised her?? what did she say??

BalloonSlayer · 09/06/2009 18:32

Oh no I didn't say anything. It wasn't important. I later saw a post where someone else mentioned it, so I know I was right. A totally above-board and honest poster on both forums.

psychomum5 · 09/06/2009 18:48

ah......was just that you recognised them by their style and 'voice' then.

EachPeachPearMum · 10/06/2009 10:18

Well some people's voices are recognisable wherever they post

BS I'm assuming you mean X?
I have certainly come across her elsewhere...

psychomum5 · 10/06/2009 10:19

am glad to be obvious.

actually, maybe not

FlappyCake · 10/06/2009 14:32

Thread seems to have gone...? Does anyone know why?

poopscoop · 10/06/2009 14:50

I can only presume that the thread was pulled because all was not what it seemed. I noticed it was still there at lunchtime as someone had added a post after yours, and it was written in a way that wanted the posters to kick off again, but I didn't bite

MerlinsBeard · 10/06/2009 15:06

glad it has gone. would have been nice if MNHQ could say whether it was or wasn't a) a troll and b) CVQ

psychomum5 · 10/06/2009 15:11

if I am right, I don;t think threads can be pulled unless asked to by the OP, or it is proven trollery, or it gets abusive.

now, was it abusive enough to be pulled, this is the thing, or maybe the OP was a troll genuine

BalloonSlayer · 10/06/2009 15:28

Yes it was, EPPM!

Very distinctive indeed.

FlappyCake · 10/06/2009 16:27

Psycho I don't recall it becoming abusive - just the thing with someone saying they knew the oP and laughing because they knew it was a pile of crap that was a bit odd...

I don't think they would delete on any other grounds, so probably either it came to light it was dodgy, or OP came back (after several days) and asked for it to go.

Who knows.