Dear mn hq is there any chance we could have a sn teens topic

[2shoes]

at the moment I don't fit anywhere and I am sure I am not alone.

What about calling it "The Tea & Quiche" room?

And I'm surprised no-one's mentioned the most important section of all:

SN Poetry!

but why have a tearoom thread, the sn topic is normally a nice place, people are friendly and aprt from a couple of heated debate(you know sn vs ms type thing) we all rub a long fine. I think if you start having tearoom threads you will spoil that mix.

as for ASD being very dominant on the topic, well someone with a child with ASD can still advise about DLA or toilet trining and some with a child with CP can help with staments and nappies.....we all can help each other so (no idea what I mean but hope you get the drift)

I'm afraid I am not in favour of the idea of a tearoom thread either. Like Peachy, I would not personally use it because all that "coffee or tea" stuff does nothing for me. But apart from that they do seem to encourage an unhealthy "us and them" mentality.

As 2shoes says, we get along fine now-people chat within threads anyway.

Are you saying posters have been too scared to post on the SN section tlanger? Because I can't recall seeing any unpleasantness on Special Needs which would have caused them to feel that way.

I agree with 2shoes' last post, especially "as for ASD being very dominant on the topic, well someone with a child with ASD can still advise about DLA or toilet trining and some with a child with CP can help with staments and nappies.....we all can help each other so (no idea what I mean but hope you get the drift) "

so I agree that too many divisions will cause, well, divisions.

But the teens thing seems to be needed and I think it makes sense to move disabled parents in there too. I think whatever 'group' sub-division makes things easier for people makes sense, if it helps to sort out the relevant threads, so grouping by age or type of person does, cos it relates to subject matter.

But sub-divisions based on niceness/ heatedness just don't make sense. As 2shoes and other long-standing members have said, there don't seem to have been many problems with people on the SN board - it's not like AIBU - and I haven't noticed anyone being hounded off either. If it has, I suppose the section in general might not be right for them, but I'm not sure a sub-division just for nice things would make that any better, or indeed work, for the reasons many posters have pointed out.

If you divide by something concrete, like age or subject, people know what will be there and it makes it easier (but too many subdivisions makes it complicated and divisive).

If you divide by something subjective, it is much harder and would, IMO, just confuse people. Isn't the board fulfilling its function as it is? If so, why mess with it too much? Just my opinion

Sorry, cross posted

I wish this had been going at the weekend when my sn dd started her periods....

And I don't have a problem with a tea-room thread - there was one started and I just stayed off it cos it wasn't my thing (a pub might be different), but it wouldn't bother me if others liked it.

GentleOtter, hope dd is OK and getting over the horror of the first one.

Why have people been hounded off (genuine question, apart from the blow up over 'my name is autism' I haven't seen any other fights).

I am really surprised to hear that too tclanger, because I honestly can't think of an instance of anyone being hounded off this section? The general atmosphere within SN (as opposed to the rest of the site) always seems very kind and supportive.

same her mrs t, I have been on sn for 3 years now(and yes have seen heated debates and broken rules myself) but I have never seen anyone hounded off, as for being scared to post??
I do get annoyed when people make these comments about the sn topic,then don't back them up.

I think she's trying not to stir things up and keeping it 'general'

hounded off?? not stirring? lol

but tc you are saying people have been hounded of fthe sn topic, surely you can back this up, I am not stirring but just have not seen this myself. I have watched the sn topic bend over backwards to help someone this week. but haven't seen attacks that you speak off.

Well I am quite stunned. Other people have been saying (openly they're on the threads) this week that they have felt unwilling to post because it had got too 'cotton wooly' for want of a better way of putting it.

Which says something about different perceptions but I'm not sure what.

I think there is a need to remember the diversity covered in a place like SN. And it is easy to forget. People are going to disagree because they're dealing with such different stuff.

I'm not convinced that a tea room (or any other chat type room) will do anything other than increase division though. Asides from the tea room incident this week I have seen similar bitchiness on other tea rooms since they started - people just seem to forget they are openly visible. I think they do alter the dynamic, perhaps not a problem in a huge community like MN but has the potential to be in a small one like SN.

I think a place where we all had the same opinions would be boring. I think everyone has the right to post their opinion; though it is a shame if that puts someone off posting, that is the nature of talk forums and I do think that the SN one is supportive of people in general.

tclanger sorry I think you mis understood me, I am not accusing anyone of anything. I am just curious about what you posted. if people feel hounded of then that needs to be addressed surely, but it can't be if know one knows it is happening. I am sure that some people don't find the sn topic is the right place for them, but is that the same as being scared to post or hounded?(that ia a question not an accusation)

Well I have seen two people comment that they are uncertain about posting and both are on the spectrum themselves so it may be that somehow jazzing up the disabled parents section as suggested by riven could be helpful.

I remain very uncertain about a tea room. It creates a space where people think they are nicer than those not in the tea room. This becomes the glue that binds the tea room together 'we're nice, those outside aren't'. When someone begins to act in a not very nice fashion -e.g by bitching about non-members- when discovered the group identity is threatened. And so no challeneges occur. You can see that still going on at the moment. The idea that lots of horrible people sudden;y invaded the tea room to shout at the nice people for no reason at all. Fine in a huge site like MN. Absolutely awful if it splits up SN.

Justabout- lots of people post without diagnosis, and tbh if you want the experience of people who have been through the system then isolating yourselves away might not be the best way to get it. If the 'other reasons' are because you don't get on with certain posters on SN then I think a tea room is only going to increase discord tbh.