Quote of the week...

[merrylissiemas]

can i nominate this:

I just love rhydian. Dh gets really arsey when i mention i fancy him. He says 'huh, why don't you marry him then'

I don't want to marry him!!! I just want to see his schlong

by lazawreath on thisthread

I meant from this thread

I know it wont be accepted, but please can I nominate the photo SirDigbyChickenCeaser has on her profile of her with a megablock in her mouth, from the hazing rituals for this quiche.

Because my pelvic floor failed me momentarily last night when I saw it.

By bran on Wed 25-Jun-08 19:53:25

"I remember once mentioning to my (single) workmates that marriage is a cold war, you never give anything without having it acknowledged and you retaliate early so you don't look weak. They were a bit , I think they were imagining something little more romantic."

This thread

From my thread moaning about the fact that DP had bought himself a pink SatNav which insists on taking us round all the little fields in preference to the M1.....

"It's pink, it's a girl , wants to go the pretty routes"

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/1375/556602?msgid=11378347#11378347

Bocos' bizarre wishlist.

By Boco on Mon 30-Jun-08 12:29:20
That's a shame, I was really only looking for an aroused badger.

from this thread

I think Little Lapin should start a fundraising spreadsheet and we club together and buy her one.

I love Bran's quote.

was very funny at around erm 10.07am sun morning

colditz on Mon 07-Jul-08 00:24:35 on this thread is fantastic

"People without children live on a different planet. This has mainly been caused by TV Babies - a common Tellylie.

TV Babies are only in the scene when the plot directly includes them. If they are not involved directly, they are Elsewhere.

This leads to assumptions of the general childless public that children who are not required at a specific time or in a specific place can also Go Elsewhere.

It can be quite a long standing and insiduous belief, held even by those who shun Eastenders and Sex In The City. There are a few childless adults who are enlightened as to the non-existence of Elsewhere, but sadly they are few and far between.

Which brings us back to your friend.

She remembers you have a child, but when she played out the horseriding scene in her head, the child was not in it. He was Elsewhere. You may have to explain to her that Elsewhere is a Tellylie. She may question this at first, and become quite irrational ("But he can watch, where could he wander off to?" "Won't your mother have him?") but if you are persistant it may eventually sink in that Elsewhere for single parents' children is just a Tellylie.
"

probably a bit long for quote of the week in its entirity I admit

auntyspan said "An Asda employee made me cry once. But then I was hormonal and they'd run out of chocolate mini-rolls."
on this thread and it made me larf.

Message withdrawn

I am so glad someone has nominated Sphill for that! Best laugh I've had this week

I didn't post on that thread but it made me laugh so much, especially 'for better or for worms'. Brilliant

.

harpo here

By MarsLady on Sun 13-Jul-08 12:07:07
Mama... where's your placenta? (I realise I've probably missed a thread or 12)

By MamaG on Sun 13-Jul-08 12:07:40
Its in Lancaster, a good 50 minute drive away -

A comedy moment with some classic crossposting on an otherwise serious thread.

By morningpaper on Thu 17-Jul-08 19:59:01
took me about 10 minutes after I'd got home

SHOCKED?! I thought it had grown teeth

thread

By nooonit on Sun 20-Jul-08 15:14:50

Out for first time since birth of DD2 with work friends (due to return after summer hols).
All sat in reasonably sophisticated restaurant ie no soft play.
I point out of window and exclaim - ooooh look! fire engine with lights flashing !They all (single childless youngsters) looked at me as if I was unhinged"

from here

By QuintessentialShadows on Sat 26-Jul-08 00:43:12
ZIPPI!
sorry you are sad.
May a website about reindeer husbandry cheer you up?

from here

By kee27 on Mon 21-Jul-08 21:22:59
can i join please so let me get this right . lol as im new to this all lol . right i bye sum thing / anything / . lol and who ever i get to swapp with i post it to them . and they will send me sumthing lol . is this right lmao grin

for being the least mumsnetty post I have ever seen. Stunning.

Hello all, there's still time to get your nominations in for this weeks newsletter.....

coclepew on the strange phone calls thread:

"We have a small boy stuck between the plahouse and the fence. Upside down"

"who the hell is he?"

"don't know" Put phone down and went to ask him

came back " Fraser".

from this thread

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/1375/577413?pg=3

By bamboostalks on Thu 31-Jul-08 17:33:00

MIL (when dh was grumpy about his football team losing) passes me my plate with mash on, she winks and says, "He needs one of those." In the mash she has engraved BJ.

From here