Dear black people of mumsnet

[PatricksRum]

Ideas for a black section on mumsnet.

Should we have separate sections i.e black hair and beauty, black parenting, black cooking or a general black section?

Link to previous

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/4018383-black-section-on-mn

[quote AMemeByAnyOtherName]@Flymetothetoon my husband is white English and he thinks this is a great idea. He also found what you just said very embarrassing. So I guess all other white people do too. [/quote]

What I’ve always found lovely about mumsnet is that we can come together with others over common ground like politics, parenting and beauty, and also debate those things. And race never has to come in to it.

I don’t want my race to dictate which sections I should post in.

Yes, I felt the same - for the first ten years of MN posting. Was happily pottering about, obsessing over The Archers, fighting the anti-boarding brigade (I thought they were vicious!) extolling the beauty of crunchy tweeds and velvet ... Until this Summer. Remember this Summer? Never mind all the rest (though the poor OP of a thread trying to discuss maternity care for black women in the U.K. sticks in the mind; properly learnt the meaning of whataboutery, there) - it was when I tried discussing Michaela Coel's "I May Destroy You" from my point of view that I realised I'm actually only tolerated here behind a veil of racial anonymity. And once one knows that ...

@HarryHarry1 I can only really speak from the Caribbean side of things (ie. not African) but culturally we sometimes have a very different view of what classes as successful parenting. Often centred around respect for adults which I've found time and time again to be quite a difficult topic to discuss with my white friends. Even my husband struggles to understand sometimes, but we work on it.

But black parenting? I didn’t realize skin colour had any impact on that!

Aww. How nice it must be to live in your world.

I forgive you. There's a lot of books you can read that will help you with your new-found realisation.

I think the idea is a fantastic one. Black health has got to be a biggie.

I think the idea would have caused less controversy had the op not been so blunt.

But black parenting? I didn’t realize skin colour had any impact on that!

Aww. How nice it must be to live in your world.

I forgive you. There's a lot of books you can read that will help you with your new-found realisation.

@NiceGerbil

MrsI

This is an anonymous chat board

No one will be prevented from reading or posting on a topic like the op wants

As for the idea that groups who are in a minority or disadvantaged shouldn't have groups where they can talk to people who 'get it' / have similar experiences - seriously?

Do you feel this way about the LGB+ parents board on here?

OP asked for black opinions. I offered one.

If an opinion is sought from LGBT+ parent about a space proposing to discuss LGBT+ matters, I might opine if I meet the criteria. Note though, I don't often feel the need to preface with 'I'm a black' or 'I'm an LGBT+ parent', etc.

Maybe a 'Black Experience' or 'Black Perspectives' section rather than seperate sub sections in each existing section. Blacknet?

If we can have a feminist section and a dads section and a gransnet then I dont see why not this.

Sorry you've had so much hostility and defensiveness on your threads OP.

But is that a “black” perspective on parenting or a Carribean one?

My family are from all over and they all have very different views on parenting but they’re specific to whichever country or culture they’re from rather than their skin colour.

Personally I would like all of them to be in one place rather than have “parenting” and “black parenting” as 2 separate sections as I find it useful and interesting to hear what everybody thinks.

@wafflyversatile

Maybe a 'Black Experience' or 'Black Perspectives' section rather than seperate sub sections in each existing section. Blacknet?

If we can have a feminist section and a dads section and a gransnet then I dont see why not this.

Sorry you've had so much hostility and defensiveness on your threads OP.

Thank you.

I really like those name ideas!

Your race won't dictate where you are allowed to post....do the Scots only post on scotsnet? Do lbgt only post in lgbt? If you don't want to use it, even if you are black, you won't have to!

Radical huh? Run it just like any other board !

Oh ffs

I am white so feel free to ignore

Comments like this make me want to vom a little in my mouth. The wokeness is nauseating.

You know you don’t have to apologise for being white?

I don’t have a problem with a specifically black section - I wouldn’t use it because I’m white but it doesn’t bother/affect or threaten me. Good luck to you.

Good idea - Black Perspectives is the way to go

@HarryHarry1 yes but as I mentioned on the other thread, if I asked for advice in the current meta about how to discipline my son for kissing his teeth at me, I would spend more time explaining the problem than I would actually getting any good answers.

@PatricksRum And what a sad one you live in if you feel the need to make snide comments and assumptions about other posters. Are you one of those who think some black people aren’t “really” black if they don’t share your pessimistic view of the world?

@Flymetothetoon

Op you seem very angry! I have a friend (you can search my threads) who was born in Jamaica as were her sons. She came to England and married a white man and lives a very nice life in a very nice village and has lots of very nice friends who are all white cos that's the demographic of this particular village.

Quite honestly I think you have a stonking massive chip on your shoulder.

So what? I am rich, my friends are rich, we still find that amongst our sons the ones who look closest to black are the ones being attacked or abused on the way to schools (many private). I am so, so grateful (and so, so ashamed of that) my DS didn’t inherit my afro hair or facial features so he can now pass for the bog standard Indian stereotype. It would be nice to discuss this in a safe space away from white people (like you) who just don’t want to get it.

@midgebabe

Your race won't dictate where you are allowed to post....do the Scots only post on scotsnet? Do lbgt only post in lgbt? If you don't want to use it, even if you are black, you won't have to!

Radical huh? Run it just like any other board !

I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

Someone posted about school toilets on AIBU earlier and had several suggestions to move it to feminist chat - I'm simply raising it as there seem to be some black posters on here who don't want this and it would be unfair if they were to post where they want to post to then be re directed to a specialist board.

Love this idea! And I'm speaking of my child who is mixed race- I am black. Especially cooking..

MrsI

There is a LGB+ board. And boards about disability. Scotsnet.

What OP is asking for is something that already happens for other groups.

If you don't like separate boards in general then that's a different argument.

Comments like this make me want to vom a little in my mouth. The wokeness is nauseating

You know you don’t have to apologise for being white?

I know I'd rather be "woke" than ignorant/bigoted (not aimed at you btw, just a general comment)
Nobody's apologising for being white, FFS.
Just saying that open to learning and understanding, if that means woke, fine bring it on.

@NiceGerbil

MrsI

There is a LGB+ board. And boards about disability. Scotsnet.

What OP is asking for is something that already happens for other groups.

If you don't like separate boards in general then that's a different argument.

Are they modded from people from within those groups?

No idea.

This site is on a report basis, it's not actively moderated is it.