FWR clarification; deletion and strikes

[ItsLateHumpty]

Hey MNHQ

(I’m) Back on site stuff from FWR to talk to you because either we’re not understanding the rules or the rules have changed and we’ve not changed with them.

There seems to be a marked increase in all thread rather than suspect post deletion.
Or regular posters getting posts deleted but not sure why.
Or you acknowledge ‘not in faith’ posters and delete a whole thread, even though there’s been some very good discussion.
And we don’t know if we’re on a ‘strike’ deletion or not 😬

Totally appreciate you guys do a difficult job, and sometimes between a rock and a hard place! but if the rules sticky was updated or deletions were explained, we’d stop tripping over our own feet which causes you extra admin work.

Can you help us?

I was going to post this on another thread but realised that with the way threads have been deleted this last week or so I was taking a huge risk. But this is an FWR clarification thread in Site Stuff so if not here, where?

I had a post deleted recently on here for (I presume) using a three letter acronym in relation to a male fetish about their fantasy of womanhood which was entirely relevant to the experience I was describing and used in context

Because we are questioning what can be said, what can't, and why, I will speak the acronym and not be coy: it is AGP and it is real. I would never generalise that all men have it, or most men...but some men. I would also not use the term autogynophilia simply to be unkind. Not being able to say it does not erase it, and there are some men with AGP. The trans widows threads illustrate the damage partners with AGP can sometimes cause in a relationship and in a family. This is something which can have a clearly damaging impact on women-- we must be able to speak it.

I know keeping things civil can be a challenge, I do understand. MN is women supporting women. Making women sneak about whispering forbidden words or risk deletion is not supportive. People who report the use of this word or its acronym as hate are still in the "no debate" frame of mind and I do think conversations around women's rights with respect to gender identity have moved on. Limiting our vocabulary is just another way of controlling the narrative.

Agree. It exists and is a factor. We can’t mention it generally and we can’t mention it individually. Those who have it can though and they confirm it’s a factor. We need a better solution.

Just posting as someone waiting for an autism assessment....

Rules need to be clear for the neurodiverse posters. Expecting us to negotiate the subtleties of some of the rules is causing us an unfair disadvantage due to our disability. Navigating NT interaction is tricky enough as it is. Having to adhere to unclear rules is impossible.

Clear rules like don't use Tim/terf or other terms are easy to understand. Some of the others appear to be more down to.interpretation... not helpful really if your disability is a social and communication disability.

Excellent point BlackeyedSusan. I had a strike based on how some readers might see my post as " a bit transphobic" (sic). I was not talking about trans people but about the behaviour of a corporate organisation.
However it was all about someone else's "interpretation"

BlackeyedSusan that sounds hard, or harder than it needs to. I really hope MN come back to us, but in the meantime please don’t stop posting.

@BullshitVivienne

I'd like to know why there's an ongoing TAAT in the form of the Bunbury threads and why that's ok?

See, ime, this is not a good faith enquiry. It's quite pathetic the obsession some have with shutting down FWR.

Exactly ECG - nice name!

It’s not what we say on FWR, it’s who chooses to take offence. And they are, typically, the easily offended.

I’ve had a post reinstated but only because it was deleted so fast I a) remembered what it said and b) could argue that my point wasn’t as inferred.

But who (of us) goes back to see if we’ve been deleted? And can be arsed to argue.

See, ime, this is not a good faith enquiry.

Yep - I was going to ask that OP why they posted on this thread (it’s not a related question and they could start a new thread) but as I pointed out on the thread they’re complaining about, they’ve never posted on FWR under the NN they’re using here, so meh 🤷‍♀️

I'm still very confused as to why I was deleted and given a strike for calling it when I saw grooming. Why is accurate describing of paedophile behaviour erased? It's fucked up imo.

the easily offended and the deliberately offended, who look for any way to attack women in discussion.

Nobody has a right not to be offended.

Why are posts deleted for discussing AGP? It's not mentioned anywhere in the guidelines. Or has it been added?

I've had posts deleted with no explanation, not just my name followed by "This post has been deleted for blah blah blah" but everything, even my name removed. No explanation. I've given up emailing to ask why, because the only reply I get is a promise of investigation, and nothing after that.

Yeah everything is in the guidelines apart from things that, on any given day, ‘aren’t in the spirit’ or don’t promote ‘civil debate’ even when they are polite and factual. Agp is one such example. Vitally important to be able to speak about it. But you can’t reference it as a generalisation or in reference to individuals. There’s a whole load of other phrases you can be deleted for - none of which are in the talk guidelines.

I think Mn will be losing good feminist posters in droves soon if they seem to be capitulating to bullies who don’t have women’s interests at heart. Sad to see so many gone.

Hello MNHQ

What was wrong with the Title of the OP where the mother wanted to use her daughters sperm to make a baby?

It was lifted (apparently) from a number of newspapers

Was it mention of trans (even though the papers had it)

Cos seriously...if I don’t know whats wrong with the title, Let alone the rest of the thread, how the hell am I supposed to know if I’m not told

The subject could obviously be discussed without the T word...but can we not use headlines as titles anymore?

Thank you, I’ll report this obviously

I had a thread deleted and no idea why.
I presumed I'd get emailed or messaged- but no- nothing.

So I don't know what I said, or whether I'm at risk of being banned. I had to start a thread asking why it was deleted.

Thanks @RufustheSniggeringReindeer that was my thread and I have no idea what I did wrong.

I've started a thread asking as MN have not been in touch and I don't know what I said that isn't allowed.

Sorry poshme

Took it upon myself to ask, as i said it could have been discussed without the t word

And you could definitely argue that the subject stood on its own merits but it would be good to know that we can’t even use headlines anymore

Although i have just remembered a deletion of a link...which had something ‘problematic‘ in it, that deletion was just ludicrous

And i get why MNHQ Can’t email for every deletion but i do think that if a thread is deleted MNHQ should email the OP saying exactly whats wrong so they don’t do it again

Thanks Rufus I just came here to post this after complaining to Bunbury

poshme you’re not the only one confused!

As the opening post was just quoting the reported headline, will threads now be deleted rather than have the OP edited if we use links or headlines?

Google search of ‘Mother of dead transgender girl sperm‘ returns more than one newspaper result with that heading. The mother in question is quoted.

I’m just wondering at the apparent push to just shut down discussion on FWR.

Especially when you are handing out strikes and bans

Its like when you get a smack from your mum and when you ask why she says ‘ you know what you’ve done’ ....and you trail off rubbing your arse

I'm not a big poster (bar the occasional supportive comment), but I'm a daily reader of FWR and really value the discussion. I know that there are people out there who don't want women discussing stuff with other women. I am really concerned that @mnhq seems to be bowing to pressure from them rather than from members. Yes, of course discussion should be courteous, but we absolutely need to have it.

• Why are posts deleted for discussing AGP? It's not mentioned anywhere in the guidelines. Or has it been added?

Agp is mentioned in the guidelines, it's been there quite a while - not allowed to generalise (which is fine) but otherwise looked at on a case by case basis, with no indication what can and can't be said and if accidentally overstepping the invisible mark gets a strike.

@ItsLateHumpty @RufustheSniggeringReindeer

Topic was fine, subject was fine.

I can't remember exactly what order id written it, but at some point I'd written 'Ugh' which crossed the line.

poshme can you ask MN to edit your post and reinstate the thread? I know they’ve done that for other threads. And I’ve seen threads where they’ve deleted everything by the OP but left the thread standing.

Seems heavy handed to just delete a whole thread with no discussion.

Yeah thats an idea posh

MNHQ are usually very helpful with things like that especially if its an ‘honest mistake’