Disablism

[BishopBrennansArse]

Shiny new thread.

Hopefully won't get derailed.

Hi just checking in I feel deflated atm after being told i was over sensitive on the last thread and astounded that some posters blanket label disability on a shall i get my son a mobility scooter for xmas thread. Sometimes I feel like im wasting energy.

sgoing.

i dislike that for other reasons.. i hate that my sons Autism is offered up like an excuse for another childs bad behaviour.

Someone kills someone - maybe he's autistic
someone hits someone - maybe he's autistic.
child is disruptive in class - maybe he's autistic
social awkwardness - maybe he's autistic.

It perpetuates the belief that Autists are violent, disruptive and dangerous. I don't want my sons disability (or mine) trotted out like that every time someone misbehaves.

Mrsd at I'd be quite happy for the often trots out "you are being over sensitive" comment to be deemed as disablist.
Can you imagine someone objecting to a sexist comment and others thinking it is ok to say you were being over sensitive.

As if we don't already have thick enough skins with all the knocks we've already had!

Why are we blamed for others lack of sensitivity about disablism?

And it is left to stand.

^ sorry mrsjayy not mrsd (auticorrect)

It is to do with the disabled not being grateful candy it is like saying well we gave women the vote why are you still complaining . we are letting you live in society and you are still complaining . Pisses me off and its ingrained some people cant or choose not to see it

Apologies for sounding sniffy Umbongo

Oh.

It's too painful to rewrite my posts. Physically painful I mean. Cos of, you know, being disabled and all.

The easiest way to drown out disabled voices is a war of attrition. The disabled person always loses. As they run out of their physical (& emotional) resources quicker.

Yes i run out of steam its like i have so much going on some days I just cant muster the energy to explain stuff

It's about value judgements and vicarious quality of life judgement

"I'd rather be dead...."

There's the thing I forget the name "hierarchy of need" that it's impossible to achieve a certain level when the basics aren't there.

My favourite is :

"Well you do have your DLA for X, Y, Z" Yes because that's not a finite, pre-allocated resource at all, it goes on for ever and covers all manner of things

Yes sadly I thnk this true MrsJayy.
We should be thankful for our lot and stop causing trouble.

I am obviously of equal importance as anyone else. In order to be equal I might need extra support. I'm ok with that.

It would seem sometimes that others aren't.

I though that was really interesting sgoing and I've mentally filed it away to bring out when appropriate

Maslows Hierarchy of needs :)

That's the one Misc

I am not disabled, I have a child with ASD and epilepsy. I just find you have to say the same things over and over again as new and evermore disablist posts crop up. Then as the thread progresses the same stuff comes up again and again because s lot of people don't want to know.

Between that and the constant battle for support you just lose interest in 'educating' those who have no interest.

I lost my threshold for educating people years ago tbh. I think you are all alot nicer than me :)
I have lived with chronic illness (sibling) and severe disability (daughter) for nearly four decades now in total. I really have no patience and I really admire the people on here for their passion and stamina but I'm not sure I have it now on mumsnet, which is a shame as I had posted and got support for my daughter before the sn boards even existed!

You are right, they don't actually want tinge educated. It's at this point that MN should be stepping in.
We are undermined when we are ignored.

I'm going to be controversial and say that I have to assume form their inaction and ignoring of these threads, that HQ agree we are oversensitive. And sometimes that they don't see disablism as disablism. Sorry HQ

Fanjo they definitely don't see disablism. I reported the fuck out of that button yesterday and most of what I reported is still there with no email even any more so I have no idea if they didn't see it or were busy or saw it and didn't think it merited deletion.

Yes. It's why I don't think things will change and don't join in on the threads any more. Shame as have had a lot from MN through the years.

Would recommend a break if it's starting to get you down auser

I'm not going to go on the threads fanjo. Yesterday was such a difficult day in general and crap on here that feels like you're defending something that should be obvious is just tiring.

We are giving very clear guidance on what disablism is and I am sure MNHQ can access professional guidance and training too.
There is no excuse really.