Poor Jeffrey only had one sheet,
a flannel, folded, rather neat,
he did not wash them very oft,
(the algae on them made them soft)
his buddies over on 8-channel
didn't care about his flannel
all their bedsits smelled the same
a mouldy sink, a sense of shame -
and so his life was turned around
when he in mumsnet's bosom found
a proper throng of goodly wimmin
to make him wash his dirty linen.
I'm feeling really sorry for him now.