"MI5 should recruit from Mumsnet..."

[KateMumsnet]

Hello all

There's a rather fabulous story in the news today, which suggests that the security services could benefit from MNers' skills. What do you think - time for us to make a [false beard] emoticon?

Well they'll let anyone in Joan...

I am already trained in CSI as I have played the games, I can even use luminal to trace blood !

MNHQ can we have that [sherlock] we were asking for on the EE thread now please?

I'd make an excellent spy. I'm really good at lying about things. I'd say "ask my husband" but he hasn't got a clue - I'm that good! I hide it all behind a façade of low confidence & bumbling confusion but deep, deep, deep, deep... down I'm as sharp as a razor.

They'll have to give me 10-15 years to become "middle-aged" though. What is that bracket anyway? 40s? 50s? I've been told I was "middle-aged" since I was about 6... Maybe that could work in my favour. If them nasties think MI5/MI6 are employing a whole load of middle-aged women then no-one's going to suspect someone in their 20s who thinks like a middle-aged woman...

Holy crap - just got curious about how much 10 rubles is worth, and it's about 10p! So 1 ruble is about a penny!

In my day spying for the motherland a ruble was officially equivalent to a pound sterling, unofficially equivalent to about 12p (if you were fool enough to change money with the guy on the street corner who was also trying to sell you a rabbit-fur hat), and then under glasnost became equivalent to 10p.

A penny! Blimey. I'd ask "what happened". but it's all too easy to guess.

/slightly ashamed I didn't know earlier

I can't get the quiz to work, as don't have Flash.

Fail.

I'm officially terrible at investigative work but I passed the listening test with 10/10!

I have always thought that women in general would just be better at that stuff, infact quite frankly running the free world would be less stressful if women did it - imagine the peace keeping talks re Ukraine, SamCam Michelle, Angela and Mrs Putin (the current one not the ex) sit down, whats the problem? find out, two coffees and a packet of custard creams/chocolate digestives fix problem, go home deal with RL, next morning implement plans and move on

I scored 7 out of a possible 8.

DH tells me that when he was at school he used to sit alongside a boy who went on to be an MI6 spook who was, allegedly, involved in some very,very, very naughty stuff.

Do you think "they" monitor MN??? Packs suitcase and heads to the nearest port

I would be a perfect spy! Dowdy, frumpy - virtually invisible.

I can't walk in heels though, will this be a problem?

I scored 8! They strongly suggest I apply

I'd love to do it BUT the last time I checked

My degree wasn't good enough
The jobs were all London based
And I don't have the language skills
I didn't quite have the experience they were looking for

and looking again, it still seems to be the case.

I wonder why they have such a problem recruiting women and people from different backgrounds when its so London based, not very flexible (and not terribly well paid).

Hmm. Hard one.

7/8 Investigative.
9/10 Listening.

Are there any other tests?

Well I'd be happy to offer my services and risk my life for the security of my country, but I do need to be back at 3:15 to do the school run. And we have ballet on Wednesdays, swimming on Mondays and tots swimming on a Friday. But apart from that my timetable's free. Call me!

skills test for mi6

10/10 on the listening!

I need a sit down.

I would love to be a spy but I can't keep a secret.

DopeyDawg .... yup, the main test is 'Can you keep a secret?'. Ooops.

I won't give any secrets away... most days I struggle to remember my own name...let alone secrets.

I'm perfect for this job, carried out some amazing detective work in the past with my over active 6th sense.

It's good MI5 want women spies, but they haven’t given info on how to apply for these jobs?

If anyone knows, please let me know.

Thanks

Like BlackeyedSusan secrets wont be a problem for me!

I would be the best James Bond ever, but I'm possibly not clever enough. Ahh well back to drooling over Daniel Craig.

You've blown you cover.
Yes.
You.
I'm telling Control.