Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Site stuff

Join our Innovation Panel to try new features early and help make Mumsnet better.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

MNHQ

Let's talk about sex toys (well, ads for them on Mumsnet), please

486 replies

HelenMumsnet · 07/10/2011 11:51

Hello.

We'd like your opinions, please, on Mumsnet taking ads for stores/sites that sell sex toys.

We accepted a campaign for one site like this earlier in the week - and then removed it after receiving a fair number of complaints.

So, what we need to know now is...

Do you mind ads for stores/sites that sell sex toys - generally speaking?

Does it matter which stores/sites these are? And what kind of stuff they're selling?

And, if you wouldn't run a mile from these kinds of ads, would you be happy to see them all over Mumsnet (with the obvious exception of our more sensitive topics such as Bereavement, Special Needs, Relationships, Miscarriage etc)? Or would you prefer them only to be in Chat?

Do please post and let us know your thoughts.

Thanks MNHQ

OP posts:
cloudsandwind · 07/10/2011 13:15

So we've got hysterical and prudish being thrown at us because we don't like this stuff. That didn't take long.

BertieBotts · 07/10/2011 13:16

I don't like them on here, because while the content of the threads themselves might be explicit, at a glance it is plain text and impossible to see. The ads jump out more - I wouldn't want DC seeing that across a room (I tend to MN in the same room as DS if he is playing alone or watching TV or something) and could imagine it might be problematic for posters browsing at work (in lunch breaks!)

I do use the site myself although tend to stick to the tamer areas(!) But I don't think it's appropriate advertising on this website. Sex toys are the kind of thing I prefer to seek out, not have waved in my face.

BertieBotts · 07/10/2011 13:18

impossible to see the content, that should have said. Although probably "difficult" rather than impossible. I don't object to swearing in thread titles, though.

JeremyVile · 07/10/2011 13:18

Helen, basically...STOP WAVING YOUR SEX TOYS IN OUR FACES!

BertieBotts · 07/10/2011 13:19

Grin At least give them a wipe down first!

Hullygully · 07/10/2011 13:21

They sell a special spray with aloe vera for that.

ElderberrySyrup · 07/10/2011 13:22

and that, Hully, is something else I wouldn't mind being advertised on here. As long as it was in Good Housekeeping.

BrainSurgeon · 07/10/2011 13:25

Massively agree with Jeremy on this one - and thus with Hully and BIWI

.....perhaps maybe... if you really wanted to trial it, and if you could find something like in Elderberry's post, you could try having the ads on on a Friday night... see how that goes...

That's me making efforts to be open minded. But if I'm 100% honest - I'm not sure I'd like it.

BeeBread · 07/10/2011 13:25

Don't like the idea at all on a very instinctive level.

Unless we are talking Myla/Coco de Mer, these places are tacky in the extreme. Don't want that in my face.

MNHQ
HelenMumsnet · 07/10/2011 13:25

@JeremyVile

Helen, basically...STOP WAVING YOUR SEX TOYS IN OUR FACES!

They're not MY sex toys. Really they're not.

OP posts:
largeginandtonic · 07/10/2011 13:26

Hmmm. I don't want it here.

Twofold reasons really. It is a bit extreme, hardly bodypaint and glow in the dark condoms. I am sure most sex toy sites are the same. The content is going to be run of the mill to extreme. Very hard to find one that is not offensive i expect.

The other reason i have is i MN during the day mostly. I have children from age 2 to 13. I do not want them looking at the adverts over my shoulder.

HarrietJones · 07/10/2011 13:30

Think others have answered for me. ( got sidetracked by the idea of a rampant rabbit jumping round the screen ala apocalypsecheese)

I'm fairly laid back about sex toys but some of their stuff goes too far.
There is a lot of people on here who will object & I think MN is better avoiding it!

FrillyMilly · 07/10/2011 13:31

Putting the speculum issue aside (I am actually quite sickened by that). I dont want ads for sex shops popping up on my computer screen when quite probably in sight of my DC. If I wanted to shop for sex toys I would do so when they were in bed. Mumsnet is not a site that I would think needed to be saved for after the watershed. I also don't want to have to worry about what DC could access if I left mumsnet open, on an iPad a colourful ad could be very appealing for little fingers to press.

Given the campaigns that you have run to stop sexualisation of children I feel it's wholly inappropriate to then start advertising sex toys. What the difference between a lovehoney ad on here and zoo in wh smiths?

LittleMissFlustered · 07/10/2011 13:32

I'd much rather the ad for lovehoney than the ones for Boden and White, but then I don't see misogyny in everything I read and look at.

I guess the best rule to have would be that if it is going to be this divisive it might be best not to bother.

Though please, do think about ditching Boden, those twee ads make me want to damage my laptop screen! Grin

nethunsreject · 07/10/2011 13:35

LMF - I don't see misogyny in everything, not by a long shot. However I do see it in the sex product industry.

ElderberrySyrup · 07/10/2011 13:38

I would love to know how someone could look at this and NOT see the misogyny tbh.
Special rose-coloured glasses perhaps?

StewieGriffinsMom · 07/10/2011 13:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hullygully · 07/10/2011 13:40

Ooo look! You can also get a three prong anal speculum! Glad xmas is coming soon.

LittleWhiteWereWolf · 07/10/2011 13:42

I missed the other thread, but honestly I'm quite surprised there would be ANY ads for sex products on MN. Sure, MN is a modern website on which women can speak freely about anything they need/want to, including sexual subjects, but having those ads cheapens some of the most important threads on here IMO.
The amount of threads on here which allow women to speak freely and safely about sexual abuse and gain a wealth of advice, sympathy and reassurance is one of my favourite things about MN. Its a safe place for women. (barring the odd troll of course)

I think its incredibly poor taste (not to mention tacky) to advertise for sex products on such a site, even if they are kept from specific topics.

In direct relation to LoveHoney--I'd never heard of them, but the products that I think Hully pointed out, are beyond the pale. To have MN associated with a site that sells such items negates an awful lot of the good MN has done.

*disclaimer: I'm not trying to claim that sex products cause abuse against women or children, I'm not that naive, and I get that websites for sex products often cater for niches and fetishes and I'm not trying to speak against the people who indulge in them and I do realise most of my post makes me sound like a prude, blah, blah. Just putting my two-penneth worth out there.

SpideySenseTingling · 07/10/2011 13:44

Adding my voice to the anti crew. Don't like them, don't want to see them, don't think they belong on MN.

But thanks for asking Smile

Pentagram · 07/10/2011 13:44

Anyone see any men tied up in the 'cuffs and leg spreader' photo's'?

Thought not....

windsorTides · 07/10/2011 13:47

I'm not aware of any site that sells sex toys, that does not also stock porn and/or products that demean women and sexualise children. I therefore don't want to see sex shop adverts at all on the site.

I'm glad you're consulting about it but was dismayed that you'd accepted advertising from this brand in the first place.

KatharineClifton · 07/10/2011 13:50

I don't particularly want to explain sex toy adverts to the kids when they look over my shoulder demanding parenting. But then I sometimes have to explain usernames as being juvenile Hmm

LimburgseVlaai · 07/10/2011 13:50

Surely if an ad is too sensitive for one part of the site, it's too sensitive for the whole site? People who are posting about an abusive relationship are allowed into chat, aibu etc?

Of course no-one forces you to click on the ad and look at the products. However, I do think the principle of promoting pornography and the sex industry on this site, which is primarily aimed at women, is very wrong.

CaptainMartinCrieff · 07/10/2011 13:53

I wouldn't like it and if these adverts became the norm I'd have to leave my MNetting to when DS is in bed as I wouldn't want him to see adverts for sex 'toys'. (Eurgh toys! Can we stick with sex aids or something?)