What is a pervert?

[FordAnglia]

I seem to recall two or three times in this bit of the board where folks have cruised by and used the word pervert, but when I have politely asked for a definition of the term/asked what they mean, the question has always been swerved. I have even been advised to google it, which to my mind seems dubious if not avoidant advice.

The term seems to be tossed around a fair bit, though usually I let it pass.

So what do the good folks of the sex board define the term as?

This is also an opportunity of course for those folks who have avoided questions to have their say and educate us.

It's very simple @FordAnglia - I'll explain it to you, as you seem to be here so infrequently that you seem not to know how Mumsnet works.

I have posted on this thread, therefore it comes up on my 'Threads I'm On' list.

When I log on, the first thing I usually do is to go to those threads and read/respond to any posts of interest.

So this thread (among several others) always pops up when someone has posted on it - hence why I've replied.

It's not about 'keeping score' FFS. In an ideal world there would be no 'us and them' / 'Sex People' and 'prudes' on this board at all; we'd all be equally motivated to keep it as a useful space where the predominantly female membership of MN can discuss sex-related queries without their posts or their PM inboxes becoming the target of men who get off on pushing boundaries and making women feel uncomfortable in their sexuality.

If that's not your aim and you feel 'got at' when posters highlight the unpleasant underbelly of the Sex board and/or raise awareness of the problematic types of posts/posters in order to safeguard those who may end up, in the course of posing a genuine query or concern, unknowingly and unwillingly providing the aforementioned men with wank bank material...maybe ask yourself why that is?

'If that's not your aim and you feel 'got at' when posters highlight the unpleasant underbelly of the Sex board and/or raise awareness of the problematic types of posts/posters in order to safeguard those who may end up, in the course of posing a genuine query or concern, unknowingly and unwillingly providing the aforementioned men with wank bank material...maybe ask yourself why that is'

I don't feel got at in the slightest, I'm merely suggesting we don't repeat the content of deleted posts, pervs like trolls will enjoy the and why encourage them?

Also lets leave 'the sex people' and prudes out of it, no matter how much it is allegedly joking. 'Posters' usually suffices.

This is from Mumsnet’s Talk Guidelines:

Post deletionsWe'll remove posts we consider to contain personal attacks, to break the law and/or to be obscene, racist, sexist, disablist, ageist, homophobic or transphobic, once they are brought to our attention. We will also delete any posts that we think are just seriously unpleasant (please note that any subsequent posts repeating the words in the deleted post may be removed also).
If a whole thread is deleted, please don't start a new one repeating and/or rehashing everything. Most Mumsnetters consider that to be very bad manners - and, of course, it's highly likely that the new thread will be deleted, too.

Some people are really very keen indeed to suppress any evidence which demonstrates that warning posters to be aware of this board's problematic element before posting in good faith is justified, aren't they?

(No one has quoted or C&P-ed the deleted post btw.)

Thank you for drawing our attention to the TGs mermaid. You make a very valid point.

This bit, in the context of this topic, is especially interesting:

We'll remove posts we consider to contain personal attacks, to break the law and/or to be obscene, racist, sexist, disablist, ageist, homophobic or transphobic, once they are brought to our attention. We will also delete any posts that we think are just seriously unpleasant (please note that any subsequent posts repeating the words in the deleted post may be removed also).

I wonder how MNHQ might be defining 'obscene' and 'seriously unpleasant'?

The only thing I'm suggesting you suppress is repeating the content, someone unhelpfully posted upthread too. I really wouldn't have thought it was rocket science yet here we are.

TBF it was a link, not actually posting the content.

@FordAnglia started this thread to ask what a perv is.

When posters gave definitions, they were told those definitions were not good enough.

When posters gave more detail of past pervy posts, but not exact detail, like in the big list by @NewRoses, they were disbelieved.

Now they’re giving more exact answers with recent examples, they are being told they shouldn’t be repeating posts. 🙄

it does almost seem as if some folks are on here 24/7 - or maybe working in a tightly knit dedicated team. All very curious.

You have an issue with women being on mumsnet too much now. Wow, fucking wow!

Oh God 🤣
You lot crack me up!
Still getting your knickers in a twist and banging on about 'perverts' and 'sex people'

It's unbelievable, isn't it.

I'm like everyone else. This thread appears on my Threads I'm On list, whenever I log in to MN.

Why shouldn't I look at it?

I'd say it's probably unhealthy to spend that much time on any forum to be honest, be it mumsnet or elsewhere, male or female.
Maybe some people should try living a little in the real world.

<bows down to the wisdom of @HornyBee>

... or not.

I'd say it's probably unhealthy to spend that much time on any forum to be honest, be it mumsnet or elsewhere, male or female.

‘That much time‘?????? You have no idea, none of us do, how long others spend on mumsnet, that was just the OP making stuff up. As for what is ‘unhealthy’, that will be all the pervy things posted about on this thread.

Whether someone pops on once a week or spends all day every day on here, they shouldn’t have to read perverted posts.

The problem is perverts, not posters spending however much time they choose to on here. Yet more deflection tactics.

Maybe some people should try living a little in the real world.

Living in a world where you entertain these pervs and can’t/don’t want to spot them for some reason, says to me that something is missing in that persons ‘real world‘. The pervs themselves obviously don’t have much of a life to be hanging around mumsnet being perverts. People who live very normal, healthy lives with healthy boundaries and morals have an issue with these perverts.

I'd say it's probably unhealthy to spend that much time on any forum

How on earth does anyone know how much time another person spends doing something online?

'They don't like it up 'em!', as the late-lamented Frankie Howerd used to cry.

Wasn't that Jonesy in Dad's Army?

You still telling jokes? You should be on stage not policing mn .

The date and time stamps of posts probably give a big indication, no?

But it is absolutely no concern of mine how anybody else chooses to spend their time.

My comment was in reply to someone twisting a posters words in order to be offended and outraged. Poster saying it seems like some people are on here 24/7 got twisted into 'you have an issue with women spending too much time on mumsnet'

The date and time stamps of posts probably give a big indication, no?

Obviously not.

My comment was in reply to someone twisting a posters words in order to be offended and outraged. Poster saying it seems like some people are on here 24/7 got twisted into 'you have an issue with women spending too much time on mumsnet'

He has made other comments along those lines. Trying to make the issue be about posters being here too often or reading too many posts is to try to deflect from the real problem which is perverts. It’s pathetic.

I think you should keep repeating how many perv posts are deleted so everyone knows just how many sleazy men post on this board. It also serves as a warning to the more naive to be more careful who they reply to.

I agree with this.

@FordAnglia started this thread to ask what a perv is.

When posters gave definitions, they were told those definitions were not good enough.

When posters gave more detail of past pervy posts, but not exact detail, like in the big list by @NewRoses, they were disbelieved.

*Now they’re giving more exact answers with recent examples, they are being told they shouldn’t be repeating posts.

👏

He has made other comments along those lines. Trying to make the issue be about posters being here too often or reading too many posts is to try to deflect from the real problem which is perverts. It’s pathetic.

He has made a few sarcastic comments about it when he wants to deflect. It appears he is trying to put posters down and make the women, who can see the pervs for what they are and are reporting them, seem like the weird ones. Tedious.