Anal sex slip

[OhNo12]

Name change for this on.
me and DH after a drunken night out had anal /
sex (we have previous done it once or twice) but he then put it from my bum into my vagina!
I didn’t really notice at the time (drunk and at brink of orgasm) but now I’m thinking about it and freaking out ! Bacteria transfer etc…..
is it really bad ? Should I call the GP on Monday ??

zero pressure from men for it

Not in my experience, nor my friends 😂

...said no woman ever.

said no woman ever

Exactly what I was thinking 😂

Yep, agree with you all. I would bet there isn't a single forum online where men ask what to do when their female partners get something "wrong" during sex and they get hurt, and loads of other men chiming in saying their partners hurt them in the same way.

Women liking it doesn't mean that it's not entirely informed by porn btw. If that makes you feel weird, have a think about why, because that's telling you something.

It's really sad.

In any case OP, I hope your infection clears up soon, and I hope you have a very stern word with you DP to make sure that never happens again.

What about the women who use anal toys when they're on their own? Or lesbian couples who do the same?

No one has to enjoy anal sex but some women do!

Plenty of women, myself included, enjoy anal from time to time. This sort of thing is discussed openly in my friendship group. One of my friends prefers anal to vaginal.

Lesbians who have anal fun - aye so we do 😂.

@mushroomushroom such forums and discussions do exist. Men being hurt by their partners on top at an angle/speed that has caused pain or injury, similarly with uncircumcised men being accidentally injured.

Luckily they exist for women too so that OP was able to get advice on her problem and perspectives from others. Whether you think it’s sad or not.

Some women just like anal sex. Nothing depressing about that. Get over it.

Oh wtf is it with women judging women!

Some women enjoy anal, I am one of those women.

OP, I hope you’re ok! These things happen but you’ll be fine as long as you keep an eye on things.

Yes, there are some women who enjoy anal. It's funny, as men who get off on anal benefit from the presence of a prostate gland that gives them pleasure, whereas women don't have that.

There are also a lot of women who don't enjoy anal. Until recently, anal sex was a very fringe sexual activity and was not remotely normalized.

Now it is normalized and women share experiences of their infections (like on this thread) and stretched anuses and everyone pretends it's no big deal. It just spices things up, amirite?

I think it is sad. I do hope women who don't want to do anal aren't being pressured into it and that they know full well they can say no.

Actually, said that woman, and so say I. It can actually be really good if you stop clutching your pearls for a second.

Doesn’t it bother anyone who has had this done to them that your partner clearly doesn’t give a shit about your sexual health?
That’s really, really depressing.

I've never watched porn, and I love it. In my current relationship I was the one to suggest it. Surprise: not all humans enjoy the same sexual experiences.

Oh I'm sorry do you speak for ALL lesbians? I'll just forget my own lived experiences since you don't believe it then won't I!

Injuries/pain from angle/speed are not the same thing at all. Injuries from the natural mechanics of sex are not the same as men deciding to insert their penis into a woman's vagina after only just having their penis inside the woman's rectum.

A better comparison to the men's forums, using one of your examples, would be multiple men having their frenulum's torn by their partners after explicitly telling the women what not to do with that sensitive body part.

I'm glad OP got advice, but it's not wrong to say that the whole thread makes me (and others) sad, because so many women have experienced actual bodily harm because of mens lack of care about women's boundaries (that are influenced heavily by porn).

Cystitis ( not necessarily). Drink A LOT of water these next couple of days and you should be all right. If not, get some antibiotics from the GP, the sooner the better.

Hardly pearl clutching to not want a STI.

As PPs said usually just a UTI.

If you’re going to have anal sex do not do it when drunk.

At the very least, you have more chance of shitting yourself.
(Unless you’re both into that of course).

I'd never do it again . Didn't enjoy it and ended up in emergency surgery. Also the cyst itself keeps coming back and while not infected it's bloody ugly . We split up and he moved on , I feel I can't have sex again as it's so ugly and unsightly. It won't go . Had treatment a further twice after the emergency surgery and it just comes back .

He was an abusive man and I feel like he'd be very happy to know he killed my sex life entirely.

I understand that some women enjoy it.

Back in my day, before online porn, most men saw the occasional soft porn mag a la playboy, and probably a video or two that again, were mostly soft porn. In consequence, anal wasn't really on their radar in the same way. I never had a guy even mention it in all the boyfriends I had before DH.

None of my women friends back then were pressuring their men into giving it a try. We all enjoyed sex.

So to me this idea that anal is pretty mainstream and something most women try, is a very new idea. Trust me, it wasn't always like that. Of course some women enjoy it but for women it is not without risk. Female anal sphincters and canals are less robust than men's. We have no prostate to stimulate via anal sex.

To my mind, before men watched easily available hard core porn from a very early age, there was much less pressure on women to engage in what is quite a risky sex act. And my observation that it was very uncommon when men didn't pressurise women, leads me to believe that it's not women begging for it that had led to its inclusion in mainstream sexual practices. It might not even always be men, it's more that people know of it and there might be a desire to explore and seem edgy and cool and not "vanilla". There's a fine line between enabling some people not to be shamed for their kinks, and causing many more to be shamed for not enjoying or wanting to explore those kinks.

To everyone reducing all of this to a prostate discussion: many women have sensitive nerve endings extending from the clitoris that can actually be stimulated through anal sex just as much as (and sometimes even more than) vaginal sex. In fact, I'm one of those women who can't orgasm from vaginal sex, but can from anal.

I don't think all sexual preferences need to, or even can be reduced to biology anyway, but there's some context for people who didn't know the above.

This. I would worry about a lack of respect here and it would give me the massive ick if my partner did this “slip”.

id also encourage any woman who’s interested in anal to research the health risks. I gather women are more likely to be injured than men, because of how we’re made. Maybe consider an appropriately sized/shaped vibrator for that area? Just worth thinking about

No poster has "reduced this to a prostate discussion".