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Mourning my dead sex life

26 replies

Paloma2023 · 25/07/2023 06:54

I’be been with my partner 10+ and we’re ‘happily married’ - we get on, love our kids, everything else is great (ie I’m not leaving him), but the sex has never been good. First six months were great but it’s just declined since then.

He just has no interest in sex and my libido is so high. He has had ED issues, and we struggled to conceive so there were problems, we’ve talked about it a number of times where I’ve explained that I love him and the ED is something I want to work through with him. He’s on pills that help, but he never seems to want to do anything. We went from not having sex in almost two years to maybe once a month - progress - but now we’re back to nothing. and when we do have sex it’s just him having a few pumps and we’re done. As I said my libido is sky high so I read a lot of erotic fiction and have lots of friends who talk about amazing sex lives, and here I am with a husband who hasn’t made me come in a decade, and I’ve basically come to the conclusion now that he never will.

it’s breaking my heart. He just doesn’t understand why I’m upset because sex just isn’t a thing for him, so I think I just need accept that if I stay in this relationship (which I will) that my sex life is dead (and always was to be honest)

I just don’t know how to mourn that and honestly it makes me so sad.

Not sure what advice I’m asking for, I just wanted to get it off my chest as it’s on my mind constantly.

OP posts:
acpk55 · 31/07/2023 13:11

@LDNH
to be honest, I wish we had split up years ago, I just kinda feel stuck now,

but yes we have stability, friendship, money, no debt, all those things that most people would love to have, but I’m so unhappy & DW doesn’t understand or care

have I thought about looking for sex elsewhere, that’s a loaded question really as it more than sex really, it’s the connection & emotional intimacy that is missing, I swear the dog loves me more sometimeS, ultimately I will probably look elsewhere for sex, which will end the marriage

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