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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

Year 7 Spring Term ....

503 replies

MaryAnnSingleton · 02/01/2009 21:52

our thread, part two - all ready for the new term !! ds goes back on Tuesday...

OP posts:
roisin · 14/02/2009 11:11

Lucky you! ds1 adores the Cherub books - as do most of the teenagers I know who've read them. (I quite enjoy them myself!) We saw RM at the Hay Festival last year and he was quite entertaining.
The new book is great.

bellavita · 14/02/2009 11:57

Thanks magenta

Hope you all have a good half term.

GrapefruitMoon · 19/02/2009 15:50

Hi all

Don't think I've posted on this particular thread before though I do have a dd in Yr7....

I just wanted to ask how all your dc's are doing in terms of staying friendly with their friends from primary school?

DD seems to have "lost" one of her best friends (who I'll call X)- they are at the same secondary but in different forms - I think the school has a deliberate policy of splitting up friends from primary... however girl X is now in the same form as girl Y who was at our primary for many years and friendly with both dd and X. Y left our primary a year or two before the end so of course the secondary school were unaware of the friendship. X & Y have now rekindled their friendship but dd seems to be excluded.... X's younger brother blurted out to dd that X doesn't want to be friends with her anymore (he has obviously overheard something at home).

She seems to be handling this ok (hard to tell as she tends to keep things to herself sometimes) - has made some new friends in her form, etc but a lot of these girls don't live locally to us, whereas her primary school friends do...

Do you think it is inevitable that primary school friendships wear out so quickly? In some ways dd is quite young for her age - is still happy to hang out with her younger brothers, etc, whereas other girls her age seem to be obsessed by celebrities, the latest mobile phone, etc (most of the girls in her primary school have older siblings).

Sorry for waffling on for so long in my first post on this thread!

magentadreamer · 20/02/2009 00:36

My Dd unfortunately went to a different school to her 3 best friends at primary, she has kept in contact with one of them but has also made new friends with a bunch of girls from different Primary schools. I think it's inevitable that friendships will change at High School. My DD doesn't get the whole latest mobile/hair/make up thing either!

Original poster
MaryAnnSingleton · 20/02/2009 07:42

welcome Grapefruitmoon !
ds has a few primary school children in his tutor group and is in the same groups as other from there in various subjects. Friendship is a bit of an issue for him, though this half term I'm happy to say that he has been to a boy from primary school's house- he rang him up to ask something about German homework and was invited over (I had to really encouage him to ring to ask and he said he didn't know how to talk to people on the phone !!) Anyway, it was a success,so we'll work on that
Quite a few of the children seem to hang about in their previous groupings but equally with new friends. Am sure your dd will be just fine Grapefruit .

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magentadreamer · 20/02/2009 10:27

Thats great news MAS. DD doesn't do phones either. She made me laugh one night as a friend from school texted and DD was panicing because if she texted back said friend would ring and she wouldn't know what to say. I made DD reply and two seconds later her mobile rang and then she was on the phone for 10 mins chatting!!

roisin · 20/02/2009 10:38

That's great news MAS.
Welcome Grapefruitmoon!
I think friendships are always such an issue at secondary, and always will be.
ds1 just told me this week that he feels lonely at school because he doesn't have much in common with anyone
There are just 3 other boys from his old primary in his year, and they are all in his class. (They are taught in the same tutor group for all subjects this year.) But these are also the boys he has most in common with, so ds1 hasn't really branched out and got to know other people.
These three are a bit of a clique as they live close together, share lifts to school, and their mums have known each other since they were babies.

I would like ds1 to step away from this group where he will always be an 'add on' and make wider friendships elsewhere, but he isn't really taking those steps at the moment.

GrapefruitMoon · 20/02/2009 11:02

Thanks everyone!

I think I am a bit sensitive about it because I found this stage so hard when I was child in terms of friendships...

I know what you mean about the clique thing Roisin - it was a bit of an issue at primary because her year had such a high number of children with older siblings already at the school - a lot of the girls already knew each other and tbh most of the mothers didn't seem interested in encouraging friendships outside this "core" group. I can kind of understand that in some ways if it is your youngest child and you don't have the energy/inclination to make new "mummy" friends yourself!

I think for now things are fine, but may change in the future when she is more interested in meeting up with friends at weekends, etc - her school has a very large catchment area and a lot of the girls in her form live in other towns, so not so easy to arrange to meet up. But I will wait and deal with that in the future!

Polgara2 · 20/02/2009 11:23

The friendship issue is a worry isn't it because we really want our dc to be happy. DD1 still sees her best friend from primary because they walk to and from school together. They are in the same form but not in any lessons together. She is separate from most of her other friends from primary though and although she was distraught at first she has now settled in really well and is making lots of new friends. In fact she is currently playing hostess to 'new friends' as I type this (am keeping out of the way mnetting in my bedroom!).

roisin · 20/02/2009 13:39

ds1 gets the bus to school every day and I thought that would be a great opportunity to spend time with mates, but his mates are all still getting lifts every day. I'm shocked - I thought they would all be on the bus by now - it's so easy and not expensive.

After yesterday's outburst I got ds1 to phone round some of his mates from new school and all school. He's going over to a friend's this afternoon and tomorrow a group of them are meeting up at the cinema.

Hopefully this will make him realise how easy it is to organise something (he did it all himself), and he won't mope around so much in future.

Many of ds2's friends all seem to live very nearby, so he just goes out and calls for them on the off-chance. (We hardly see him in the hols!) But none of ds1's friends live very close, so he doesn't/can't just call round.

bellavita · 20/02/2009 13:55

MAS - what great news

Welcome GrapefruitMoon

I don't think that DS1 does too badly on the friendship front (keeps fingers crossed). A lot of his primary school friends live in our village and three of them are in his form group.

He talks about various boys (that are not from primary) too.

He had an old primary school mate (from another village) over to sleep last night.

I think he is the "everyones" friend type IYKWIM.

But it is very easy for him to walk around the village calling on his friends.

Well done Roisin's DS for organising the "flicks" and with a bit of luck it will be the start of him organising lots of other things with friends.

magentadreamer · 21/02/2009 14:48

How did the trip to the cinema go Roisin?

roisin · 21/02/2009 21:04

Oh - thanks for asking - it went fab. And he went to a mate's afterwards for tea.

All it took was a few phone calls on his part and it was a great success. I'm going to keep reminding him to get the phone numbers of more of his school friends, so that he can do this more often in future.

bellavita · 21/02/2009 21:09

Am glad it was a success roisin.

magentadreamer · 23/02/2009 07:46

Glad it went well for him Roisin.

DD is up and in a grump as she doesn't want to go to school as she's tired!

bellavita · 23/02/2009 08:11

ahah - funny you should mention tiredness magenta!

The ds's did have a lie in most of last week to be fair to them, rising at about 8.00ish, but saturday and yesterday they were up before 7.00 . So of course, this morning, they couldn't get out of bed.

Original poster
MaryAnnSingleton · 23/02/2009 12:25

hooray for roisin's ds1 and a successful cinema trip !
ds was up and about on time today but not looking forward to basketball because 'the ball is hard' and he says he's useless at it - I said the usual 'just have a go' type of things ! He also has to make the appointments for parents consultation evening which is coming up - I've written on his sheet when to start making them and hope he thinks of leaving enough time between each one !

OP posts:
Original poster
MaryAnnSingleton · 24/02/2009 18:13

well he's booked 3 appointments, all at sensible interviews so far !

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Original poster
MaryAnnSingleton · 24/02/2009 18:14

interviews ? intervals !!

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roisin · 24/02/2009 20:30

Oh - parents' evenings: what fun!
How many teachers are you going to see? Do you get to choose or just see all of them?

ds1 seems suddenly less enthusiastic about school. I'm not sure whether it's just him growing into teenagerhood, or what. He's only 10% of his way through his time at that school, so I hope it's not all downhill from here

Original poster
MaryAnnSingleton · 24/02/2009 21:42

you get to choose who you see, so have picked about six - his favourite subjects plus maths because he struggles there ! Am sure they go through phases of enthusiasm and not so enthusiastic about school..try not to fret !

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magentadreamer · 24/02/2009 21:45

Has something happened Roisin or is it just one of those pre teen things? We have the joys of parents evening in May.

DD got her Maths project back and was only one of 3 to put references -after much nagging from me! She got 80% and is feeling rather proud of her little self. She's hoping to get the half term test for Science and her science project back tomorrow.

Pancake day was a great success at school as they sold them in the canteen at break time. DD has been taking a pack lunch since monday due to the food running out and the only veggie sandwiches being filled with processed cheese -she's a cheese snob

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 24/02/2009 22:11

DD1 is off on a G&T art trip tomorrow. She is really looking forward to it - because they can wear their ordinary clothes!
Still trying to figure out this G&T thing - DD1 has been listed for 'intellectual ability, art and music.' Her friend who is definitely more talented at art than her has been listed for music but not art. Her other friend, who is definitely more talented at music has been listed for art but not music.
There are other anomalies like this apparently too.
Does anyone else have similar G& T systems at their schools?

bellavita · 25/02/2009 00:40

We have been given a decent time for our parents consultation (I did write a pleading note to the form tutor ) and it has come back for 9.30am on 5th March. We only get to see the form tutor who apparently has all the feedback from all the other teachers DS1 has.

DS has got an English project to do, DH and I have told him how to go about it, but will he listen.. gah!

roisin - hope you ds is ok and it is just a short term thing?

magenta - 80% you must be really proud of her. DS did not mention pancakes so I take it they have not done anything at school.

LGP - DS has got a geography field trip where they can wear their own clothes - he has already told me what he is wearing!

MAS - how is DS getting on with being a generous soul with his dinner money?

magentadreamer · 25/02/2009 06:39

Whats his English project on Bellavitia? DD has another Maths project to do but thankfully it's more Maths based this time.