Private Schools- worth it?

[SparkyPants]

My dad is coming to the end of yr7 in a local senior school.
It's not been great (shitty year accounted for- still not great)
As with many, we've seen a Massive shift in personality, drive, ambition and desire to engage.
We've done our sims and can send her to a local private school.
I'm looking for people's experiences and perspectives please!?

One state school. The one known to you. Not all state schools. You keep saying really offensive things as if all state schools are the same! They really are not.

But so do you about private schools. At the end of the day we can only talk about our own experience, teacher or parent.

@MsTSwift

If they have no experience of said school. Fair enough if their child has gone there but private school parents parroting half truths about local schools they have zero direct experience of really grinds my gears.

Yes I feel similar about smug state school parents saying they don't like their kids private school friends because they aren't streetwise enough.

@SparkyPants did you manage to speak to your daughter OP ?
We did state primary and private secondary and wouldn’t have it any other way, unless money side of things was making it impossible.

@Bryonyshcmyony

I've not said they are better. My experience is that my dcs have had the same excellent teachers throughout their GCSEs and a levels. There is barely any churn. Teachers in our state school didn't seem to last 5 minutes.

I've been in my school for 26 years. My best friend in hers for 27 years. The VAST majority of teachers I work with and know find a school they like and stay there, only to leave for promotion or negative change of SLT (rare). PP is correct- we all train at the same places and their list of the different kind of teachers you get is funny and very accurate! Teaching in a private school doesn't make you excellent. You're excellent if you're excellent. And you can't base it on results- as private is selective so are creaming off the cleverest kids who are motivated.

I don't know about anyone else, but I'm bloody great.

Many of my friends dds private school mates are extremely streetwise 😁. You can’t categorise children or teachers by whether they attend a private school or or state school or not - it’s frankly silly and rather embarrassing.

I guess most schools and work places are broadly similar - most of the teachers at my dds school are very good a minority are incredible and another minority not so great. It’s all girls in nice area so quite an easy gig for teachers as minimal discipline so they tend to stay.

@Bryonyshcmyony
What about private school parents who say that the boys their DD’s socialise with from the local school are nicer than the private school boys. Oh that was you! I suppose you are allowed to say that.

We're in exactly the same situation. DS in Year 8 at an outstanding state secondary. He's very bright, but not at all engaged or motivated since the lockdowns. Many pupils messing around in class, he wants to join in. Grades affected. We're visiting an independent school with a view to him starting in September. It's the smaller class sizes, and calmer learning environment that appeals to us. No guarantee that he'll knuckle down, but we feel we have to give him the opportunity. We live in a deprived area and his friends and their families just don't have the same type of aspirations as we do. I don't want to look back and wonder if moving him would have made a difference.

May I know about priory school

@seriouslystumped

We're in exactly the same situation. DS in Year 8 at an outstanding state secondary. He's very bright, but not at all engaged or motivated since the lockdowns. Many pupils messing around in class, he wants to join in. Grades affected. We're visiting an independent school with a view to him starting in September. It's the smaller class sizes, and calmer learning environment that appeals to us. No guarantee that he'll knuckle down, but we feel we have to give him the opportunity. We live in a deprived area and his friends and their families just don't have the same type of aspirations as we do. I don't want to look back and wonder if moving him would have made a difference.

I’m curious how someone can live in a deprived area and afford school fees? Genuine question. Or are you going for a bursary

@Scaredycat87 It's very easy. It's a dilemma we face even though my husband is a v.high earner and I earn a decent wage too. Not everyone wants to pay the higher mortgage/rent to live near decent schools. Or maybe people are grounded to these areas for other reasons (ours is family). Our local secondary schools are not good, which is why I find myself trawling these threads as DS gets older. Even my 'you should at least consider the local schools' friend backtracked after doing her own research on them (like I didn't consider checking them out before considering private )

As others have said you can’t really compare sector by sector but rather school by school. In our village there is an outstanding primary and a prep. Very few locals choose the prep because the village school is fantastic and has facilities to rival the prep. There is however a massive difference at secondary. One year 90% of our school cohort went on to private. This creates a bit of a secondary modern feel to the states we’d be eligible for. There is no way I’m sending my daughters to the catchment school and have made decisions re work to make sure I can save and pay for fees.

Re. better teachers at state or private. I went to state until A level, and then private for A level. My English teacher 'followed' me. That English teacher was an absolute bitch at the state school. At the private school she was suddenly kind and nice to all kids. Why? I don't know. But I did notice that ALL the teachers were suddenly terribly nice and kind to me, where they'd just let me drift at state - or were actively unpleasant (like the English teacher). I expect because they know they need to behave a certain way since the kids are now their clients, at some level. So adding that perspective to the mix too!

@lookhappy

Re. better teachers at state or private. I went to state until A level, and then private for A level. My English teacher 'followed' me. That English teacher was an absolute bitch at the state school. At the private school she was suddenly kind and nice to all kids. Why? I don't know. But I did notice that ALL the teachers were suddenly terribly nice and kind to me, where they'd just let me drift at state - or were actively unpleasant (like the English teacher). I expect because they know they need to behave a certain way since the kids are now their clients, at some level. So adding that perspective to the mix too!

Maybe she just preferred her new job?

Our school is full - always over subscribed and also will only take those who ‘hit’ the grade.