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Secondary education

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Original poster

Do you let your DC do homework (on laptop) in their bedroom?

53 replies

stirling · 28/11/2019 19:52

Or only downstairs where you can keep an eye on what they're doing?

I've got controls on the computers etc, bought them each a light portable laptop. I do get sick of the endless homework related clutter that mounts every evening and is never properly cleared away. We so often eat our dinner on a table that's scattered with books, stationery, laptops etc.

But if I send them up to their rooms I feel like I'm limiting our 'togetherness'. Not sure I'm making sense but both get tons of homework, their school is crazy.

Thank you

OP posts:
bagsofbats · 28/11/2019 20:00

Nope, screens downstairs only in our house. If they took them upstairs there would be more faffing than work getting done (by their own admittance).

dementedpixie · 28/11/2019 20:02

Dd does hers upstairs, often sat at a computer desk

Butternutsqoosh · 28/11/2019 20:10

Mine do theirs upstairs on their laptops and they are in year 10, I've never had to ask them to do their homework, they just get on with it...DS is another kettle of fish!

TheCanterburyWhales · 28/11/2019 20:15

In her bedroom, often on her laptop as they work a lot digitally.
Wouldn't cross my mind to check up on her now she's a teenager.
Tbh, with phones etc, if they're going to engage in porn, get addicted to gaming or joining the Lib Dems they're probably not going to do it while they're writing an essay on Hamlet.

glitterysocks · 28/11/2019 20:28

My eldest two study in their rooms because they wouldn't get peace otherwise.

I check up on the 11yo pretty frequently when she's meant to be studying and she comes works at the dining table if it's something she needs help with.

The 13yo can work away on her own fine but I do check in on her occasionally.

RedskyToNight · 28/11/2019 20:59

There isn't a sensible space downstairs where they can do homework and "we can keep an eye on them". I imagine this is true for a lot of people. Surely there is not much "togetherness" if they are focused on their homework anyway?

Original poster
stirling · 28/11/2019 21:45

Thanks everyone. Interesting to hear your thoughts. TheCanterburyWhales I did laugh!

OP posts:
TowelNumber42 · 28/11/2019 21:47

Mine all choose to do homework downstairs.

totallyradllama · 28/11/2019 21:48

I think the more you can stay connected the better when they're teens tbh

teenageanxy · 28/11/2019 22:20

A mix of both at the moment.

It is annoying getting the table cleared for dinner

Squidsister · 28/11/2019 22:27

A bit of both. DD 14 does hers in her room because it’s too distracting downstairs with siblings around especially if she’s trying to work out some maths or write an essay.

DS 11 needs more supervision!

lljkk · 28/11/2019 22:28

They are allowed to be on their phones in their room (or in the street or on the Sainsbury's wifi...) so laptop access in room would allowed, too.

AChickenCalledDaal · 28/11/2019 22:31

I think my teens would be quite pissed off if I insisted on "togetherness" while they were trying to concentrate on homework. They can work wherever they like as long as it gets done. But I do maintain communication about what they have on their plates, whether they are on top of it and whether they need any input.

champagneandfromage50 · 28/11/2019 22:31

too distracting downstairs. I take the phone off my 12 yr old as he still gets distracted. My DD is 16 and in GCSE year and is focussed. I have access to the parent portal so can see what homework is due and check

PandasandRabbit · 28/11/2019 23:34

One does it downstairs, one upstairs and I leave them to it. They only discuss with me if they need help / sympathy.

averythinline · 28/11/2019 23:34

Downstairs here and painful table clearing to/no radio or anything as ds v v v easily distracted... do find it helps with chats and togetherness

TheAnnoyingSatsuma · 28/11/2019 23:42

All in their own rooms, on own laptops.
But they just get on with it, and get it done, so no reason to micromanage. They have known from primary school onwards that If homework wasn’t done they would have to take the consequences meted out by the school.

BackforGood · 28/11/2019 23:45

In their rooms.
Is going to depend very much on your child though.

In truth, I was rarely 'there' (at home) when they got in from school, so it made no difference if they were at the kitchen table, in their bedrooms or anywhere else - there had to be a level of trust and self motivation to crack on with their homework anyway.

megletthesecond · 28/11/2019 23:48

Yes. DS is allowed to do it in his room, it's quieter in there. He keeps the door open though so I can keep an eye on him.

shouldhavecalleditoatabix · 29/11/2019 00:09

DD does it in her room and often will FaceTime her friends and they do it 'together'. I know she's doing it as I get the app flag up when it's done and I often drift into her room and see/hear them reading the stories they've written back to each other or maths or whatever. DD is 13 and has been very studious since starting high school. If there were issues I would step up supervision. Youngest DD still does it downstairs as she needs more help. I think DD1 likes being trusted and treated as an adult and in turn is very good

SingingSands · 29/11/2019 00:13

Mine both do homework upstairs. I usually leave them to it, but stick my head round the door now and then or pop in and out with laundry. Our house is tiny though so even if they're upstairs we don't feel disconnected from each other, and we're a pretty "open doors" family. I also don't want them to feel they are being policed by me - they're teens, they are allowed a bit of privacy and headspace when they want it.

RockinHippy · 29/11/2019 00:37

A mix of both depending on how much space she needs. Prefer her room though so I don't have to look at her left over crap for the next week or clear it myself.

She's always been fine just getting on with homework though & prefers the quiet if her own room, & the only friends she chats with are group chats about the actual homework whilst she's doing it.

I really think it depends on your DC though

Original poster
stirling · 29/11/2019 07:36

Thanks. What I meant about togetherness was not sitting next to them while they're doing their work... More that it's further distancing. So from 7 till 4 I have no contact with them as they're at school. It's no exaggeration to say they often spend up to 4 hours doing their homework in the evening. So if they were up in their rooms, I'd not have any contact for 12 hours.
And at the weekend they go to their dads.

I think downstairs has to be the only option for me till I can get an appointment with the headteacher to ask why on earth they're getting so much homework.

OP posts:
RedskyToNight · 29/11/2019 07:59

Sounds like the issue is too much homework then (if you discount art, I don't think my DC spend much more than 4 hours a week ...)? Are you sure that they genuinely spend all that time on homework - and not some time on homework followed by a large chunk of time catching up on the latest school drama?

Surely if your teens are diligently working , they will want to be undisturbed? So if you sit them downstairs and expect to use the time to also catch up with them, can't see how that would work?

amidaiwas · 29/11/2019 08:15

4 hours a night ?! Madness.
My yr9 dd does about that a week (and will get good grades)