DS wants to repeat Year 13

[user20]

Hi,

My 18 y/o DS who is in Year 13 and is due to finish school forever at the end of this year is wanting to go back next year to repeat the year. He is currently out on study leave.

Basically, he is only doing one a level as his attendance was below 80%, not just this year but last year in year 12 too.

He has had no valid reason for this behaviour, he has just been lazy and made excuses and turned up to school whenever and when it suited him.

He is an intelligent guy, he got 4As and 1B and 2Cs in his GCSEs, It has annoyed me and my DH a lot over the last two years that he has wasted his potential like this, he could have done so much better.

I just want him to have a better life and employment opportunities.

He just seemed so distracted over sixth year, he just seems to be always on his phone and listening to music and on social media. he was missing deadlines, not revising for exams, well last year he did but left it to very close to the exams and came out with 2Ds and a C in his AS exams which is impressive for somebody who didn't bother going to school or revising.

The school were meant to Kick him out so many times as they tried working with him but he didn't co operate, the workload got too much and he had to drop down to one a level a few months ago as it was too much work to do in such a short period of time.

He has a btec ict exam in a few days and hes done nothing for it - he can't even be bothered to work for one exam.

He has said often that he regrets his behaviour as he knows he was capable of doing more and maybe going to uni in September, I wouldn't be bothered if he chose not to go to uni but I think he needs his a levels.

Anyway, after a long wasted two years, reality has kicked in as he now wants to have a good career and has found out that if he were to start a two year a level course at an FE College, his education wouldn't be funded from September 2020 onwards.

He now wants the option to go back to school next year and repeat Year 13 - is it likely after all this carry on that they'll have him back?

And I honestly don't get why some people on this are giving the impression that his gcse grades wouldn't be enough for him to be successful in his a levels

Because they are teachers and see pupils achieve these grades and go on to find A Levels more challenging. Your son achieved slightly above average grades, however the Bs and Cs indicate that A Levels will be more of a challenge to him than students who got straight A*s.

From all the really great suggestions you are still defending him when the reality is it has to come from him. He is 18.

I think what started this whole mess of was the fact that in year 11, there were a few non attenders who were hardly ever in school and weren't allowed to sit their gcse exams.

He has said to me on a few occasions, particularly when he first started year 12 and was called in for a meetings regarding his attendance and the school were threatening to remove him but obviously that never happened, "oh well person X and Y were never in school during year 11 and they got away with it so why can't I?"

I explained that just because he couldn't see them being dealt with, that of course they were behind closed doors.

I'm sure as the pupils with extremely low attendance during year 11 were being monitored by the education welfare services

@Teachermaths yes and again, I know he didn't achieve top grades in his GCSEs but he did well enough. Plenty of people get Bs and Cs in their GCSE's and go on to do a levels and university.

As per my OP, he got 2Ds and 1 C in AS levels - they are crap grades but in all honesty are they really that bad for somebody who didn't try at all? If he worked from day one he could have easily got As in his a levels. So I think In his case his GCSEs are irrelevant really, he could have done well if he wasn't so lazy and worked instead of doing f#ck all.

There are people he is friends with who did go to school and worked hard during their AS' but actually did worse than he did and got 3 Us!

@Arewedone read my posts and you'll see that I don't actually defend him, I'm beyond furious as to how he could do this with his a levels so actually I am nowhere near to defending him.

I will and am defending him from people who say he wouldn't be capable of doing well in his a levels due to his GCSEs because in his case it is so untrue.

I repeat this, he only messed sixth form up due to his attendance and his lack of work.
Are you saying that somebody with 2Ds and 1C in their AS' with 70% attendance and barely any revision wouldn't be capable of getting As had they tried? Well of course he could.

He's way smarter than me and I know for certain if I had done what he did I would have got Us in all my AS' so for him to not even fail a single one just goes to show he would have done extraordinarily well had he worked so I don't think it's correct saying he wouldn't be likely to get As in his a levels due to his GCSEs - he could have - maybe not A*s but he would have got As anyway

Very few people get A grades at A Level “easily”.

I think you're still got the blinkers on. His GCSE results don't suggest he was even going to be a natural A level candidate. You're saying he did badly because he missed lots of school. It's likely that he missed lots of school because he found A levels too hard, and got demoralised and demotivated. It's very common, particularly with boys, when something it too difficult, it's easier to truant, snapchat, anything but work hard. They then tell themselves that the reason they did badly was due to them not working - it saves face, and saves admitting they weren't perhaps as bright as they thought.

Four As is perfectly acceptable, his results are fine no one says otherwise. But honestly they indicate a BTEC route rather than an A level route. You and he seem keen to repeat this mistake.

And keep the gym and ditch the phone!!!

@EvilTwins that's right, but with hard work it's more and more likely.

In fact the two subjects he got Ds in last year , he wasn't actually far off Cs as they were very high Ds so to get near 3 Cs in AS' with awful awful attendance and no work is pretty dam good and that just shows in itself what high grades he would have got if his behaviour was different

Plenty of people get Bs and Cs in their GCSE's and go on to do a levels and university.

Actually no they don't. Some do, but they're the exception not the norm.

@titchy I don't know what happened to him in all honesty, but I won't change what I have said. He is intelligent and he could have done well if he wanted to.

Also, Bs and Cs are fine in GCSE's. It's great if people are able to get A stars and As and it's absolutely brilliant but I don't see anything wrong with Bs and Cs. This country really is going to the dogs if all the Kids have to achieve A stars and As in their exams to be considered bright. Everybody is bright in their own way and a B in a subject is excellent too but of course not exceptional.

but I don't see anything wrong with Bs and Cs.

Aargh OP you are so frustrating! No one says there is anything wrong with Bs and Cs!!!!!!! Just that Bs and Cs are very unlikely to lead to decent A level results.

Phone/gym question?

OP I have seen lots of students with similar grades to your ds come out with similar AS grades whether they worked or not. You have no idea what he would have got if he had worked, only that he probably would have done a bit better. 70% attendance isn't totally awful. He obviously went to some lessons and did some work. I'd say he got a grade that is about 70% of what he can do. He would not be aiming for A grades.

Your posts are defensive and full of statements about how clever he is. He clearly isn't that intelligent based on his actions and grades.

In fact the two subjects he got Ds in last year , he wasn't actually far off Cs as they were very high Ds so to get near 3 Cs in AS' with awful awful attendance and no work is pretty dam good

Why did he drop the subjects? Was that the school’s decision or his?

You sound like you’re in denial. A D is a D, no matter how nearly a C it was.

@EvilTwins I know a D is a D but all I'm saying is it's not as if he was just right on a D.

The school suggested he should drop down to two subjects a few months ago so he did but he was miles behind in one of the two he was doing so he decided himself to drop down to one a level

OP- you asked for advice but refuse to accept the facts. You obviously care very much ,BUT your son doesn’t, if he did he would have made an effort with his ICT exam.
You can’t keep making excuses for him- he’s 18.

@Teachermaths I am only being defensive as I know my own son better than anybody else does, I know for a fact what grades he could have achieved in his AS' if he worked and this is not just my opinion, all his teachers have said it to me and DH on numerous occasions.

All I know is that last year his attendance was about 70% but I need to add that his attendance was probably less than that as most of his free lessons were actually in the periods after his lunch which is when the afternoon registers were taken and he ensured that he marked himself present in the study centre before he took himself home from school - he did attend some classes but certainly not many and if he did do any kind of revision / exam prep, it wasn't very much.

@Sovienonblanc I do Accept the facts though - his behaviour has been absolutely awful and I do NOT condone it in any way, shape or form.

All I will say is that he would have got higher than Cs in his AS' if he worked. May not have been 100% certain, but I'd say it was very likely. His GCSEs wouldn't have stopped him from achieving more than Cs in a levels

You're not a teacher or examiner. You have no idea what he could have got. Really you don't. Even the teachers will give you a best case scenario. There's no student getting Bs that I'd be saying would be confidently getting As at A level.

I think you've shielded yourself from the truth for too long and now have hit the panic button.

BUT he didn’t work and hasn’t worked. You can’t blame yourself, he needs to make the changes himself. All of the changes need to come from him owise you are just going to drive yourself crazy.

@Teachermaths and yes he is intelligent academically, his thinking and attitude regarding school has been stinking, I agree with you on that one but he is not stupid in general.

I don't know you, but I'm sure as a teacher you have dealt with many pupils with low attendance who are normally bright but haven't done well in their exams due to low attendance. I can guarantee you DS would have at least got 1 A in his a levels

I have dealt with many. And no pupils getting Bs at gcse got As at A level no matter how hard they worked.

@Sovienonblanc absolutely - I just wish he would grow up - honestly the stress of this is making me feel like I'm 100 years older than what I am!

He needs to wise up and get on with it and accept that he was wrong and that he needs to work as qualifications are not handed to people on plates

@Teachermaths each case is different though, and he did get 4 As at gcse, his older brother only got one A in his GCSEs and got an A in his a levels.

DS' attitude is awful at times - I'm sure you agree with me that the school should have told him to leave a long time ago.

He knew that the law doesn't require school attendance beyond 16 and he always maintained that since there would be no Education Welfare Officer involved that he would just go into school as and when he pleased. Long story short it has slapped him hard in the face and I have no sympathy for him so I hope you don't think I am defending him as I'm not

I'm in the same position as you. Ds is in y13 studying 2 Level 3 BTECS and 1A-level. The BTECs are fine (he's predicted Distinction Star and has previous module exams and coursework to back up the prediction) The problem is the A-level. He needs a C to go to uni but is predicted an which is generous IMO. His attendance has been awful (much worse than your son) and I would have accepted school kicking him out but he's gone in and charmed them so their so-called final chances have been not final at all.

BTECS have been a godsend for him. The modular structure and high coursework content means that he's been forced to submit coursework regularly from y12. With his A-level he's repeated what he did at GCSE- fuck all until the last minute. Retaking will be a complete waste of time for my Ds. If he doesn't get the C at A-level I will advise him to work for a couple of years then consider an Access course. Enrolling on any old uni course is pointless and I haven't said this to him but I suspect that he may not be mature enough to do the studying even though he'd be fine with the self-care. Ds has already discussed the possibility of retakes but I've been blunt and said that I don't think he has the motivation so it's pointless right now but if he decides to do it then I will support him.

All I will say is that he would have got higher than Cs in his AS' if he worked.

But he didn’t. And nothing could convince him to do so. Choosing to drop to one A Level is choosing to not go to university - if he’s as intelligent as you claim, he must know that. One A Level is utterly pointless. Sorry if that sounds harsh but it is. One A Level literally gets you nowhere. If he wants to re-do anything next year, he’s better off withdrawing from that one (school might ask you to pay the exam fee) and then at least he won’t have completed L3 courses and there is more of a chance an FE college would take him on.

I’ve taught 6th Form for many many years and if I was one of your DS’s teachers, I would be frustrated but also be thinking that he has pretty much got what he deserved.