Independent school visit- DD put off by pupils

[DrTinkle]

We went to a really great school today which will offer DD so many opportunities, we did the tour and she met the teachers and was able to correctly do all the tasks they asked her to have a go at. She is at a state school, is a very high performer and well liked. The school we looked at is academically selective and we are advised DD will get in.

So far so good but she was put off as the pupils doing the tour were very nice but over confident, precocious and, well, a bit odd. One girl was stealth boasting that she was so disappointed to only get an A rather than A* in her worst subject at end of year tests and D found the whole attitude off putting. Their over confidence just felt sort of at odds with our working class ways- does that make sense?

Thought perhaps the precocious ones had been pulled out to impress parents and reassured DD that there will be a more normal spread of people day to day. Have emailed to see if we can visit on a normal day. None of us went to private selective type school, do you think there is there a chance DD just won't fit in?

I've been shown round schools by some dreadful girls. One girl had so many facial piercings that i couldn't focus on what she said. It was only when I asked her what she wanted to do after school and she said "Work in Disneyland. Wouldn't it be cool to dress up as Arial?!" that I was pulled back into reality.

This is a fantastic school and I asked my cousin (who was a current school dad at that school at that time) what she was like and his boys laughed and said "She's sooooo eccentric. Don't take any notice of her. We'll show you round and tell you all about rugby..." - so all tours are subjective.

It's the luck of the draw.

You can be disappointed not to get an A* just as much as disappointed not to get a C, or any other grade.

Saying she's disappointed isn't necessarily anything other than that.

Dm was a teacher, and I can remember the year she was disappointed over one result, and thrilled to tears over another. The disappointing one was a B (no A* in those days) and the thrilled one was a G.
She still 20+ year later talks about the G and what an achievement it was.