Is your child in the top set of a comprehensive school? Can I ask you something?

[Hakluyt]

Do they get bullied because they are in the top set?

I have been told on another thread that this is a common experience- is it?

...and FWIW, ds was bullied at primary school (not for being clever, just another also clever kid who lacked self-confidence), so it's not that I just refuse to imagine that it happens.

(The primary school were fantastic about it and dealt with it strongly both times)

DS1 was bullied at primary school for being Scottish (allegedly). The real reason was that he was in a class full of little shits and the school let them away with it. The Scottishness was simply a pretext.

No bulling of DC in the top sets but a simmering seething resentment towards them from DC in lower sets. They feel that the school showcases these students thus undermining their (the DC in the lower sets) work ethic. Also the top set students are seen as 'precious' and lacking in any kind of empathy for students that have to work hard just to get a C.

Perhaps you could ask the question 'Are your DC resentful of the DC in the top sets?'of those MNers who have DC in lower sets Hakluyt?

No, not my dd either. She has only started secondary school in August so early days. She is in the classes with her small group of friends so she's been very lucky.

In primary she was occasionally called teacher's pet etc, which did annoy her but she ignored it.

Perhaps you could ask the question 'Are your DC resentful of the DC in the top sets?'of those MNers who have DC in lower sets Hakluyt?

Good point! Though since the question is about bullying, I guess it's easier to know, and to say, that your child is/isn't being bullied, than to say (or know) that they are a bully...

The bullying done to ds1 was acactually mainly done by other top set kids. Bright kids who didn't like to/didn't want to work in class and took the piss out of ds1 because he did want to.

He consistently kept his head down and didn't retaliate. The school complimented him as a 'model pupil' but did bugger all about the bullying. It was always a supply teacher issue. When the reality seemed to be a general lack of control of classes by teachers, consistent poor behaviour from a core group of students and it's still happening now two years later. (have friends whose children are still at the school). They are now becoming an academy like most schools in our county. Maybe things will change?

In the meantime schools that were doing badly have steadily and surely been improving and yet the sought after school is gradually getting worse results. Imo they rested on their laurels a bit, as they have always been the 'good' school that is oversubscribed with a good catchment area. It will be interesting yo as what happens in future as we have a new high school opened this year and as I said the others are now outperforming it.

No not at all.

It's more normal to be geeky at dds school than cool. In fact to the extent that geeky is cool.

DD is in year 8 and at the local bog standard comp. She's top of almost everything bar PE. Not a stealth boast, she's firmly middle class and has had advantages her classmates from the surrounding estates haven't, of which she is very well aware.

There seems to be less bullying at this place than in the smaller, more MC primary she attended. I've certainly not noticed any bullying aimed at her or indeed anyone.

Like Yacinamac's DS she is at a South London school in an unfashionable area with a high percentage of ESOL and free school meals. It's a lovely and supportive school.

My DS is almost 16, in top set and has never had an issue with bullying.

Neither did I in school (eons ago)...

Nope mine aren't bullied over anything (dd kept being hit in junior school but that was one particular child who absolutely hated her guts)

Which in the case of ds1 surprises me to be honest, I was really worried he would be bullied but no

Low level intimidation by older children but no bullying per se

"Low level intimidation by older children but no bullying per se"

Isn't that bullying?

Large Sarf Lunnon comps are obviously the way to go

Non-leafy ones, obviously.

I am most heartened by the number of our kids who seem to be defying the MN cliche.

Intimidation is probably a bit harsh

Big boys pushing past smaller boys or saying "move midget!!", so not being hurt or frightened just unnerved

There is bullying at the school, but my children (so far) have not suffered from it

Just spoke to ds1 (year 11) and d2 (year 7) and they have told me that the year 11's are quite upset at the "rudeness" of the year 7's!!!! I think that's funny...youth of today!!

And in the same way that reception children in the infants are "picking" on the year 2s, the year 7's are doing the same !!

mother
on the bus home DS was careful to not get involved with a fracas among the kids who do not go to yob central.
They fight among themselves, they do not pick on him for being a geek.

DD is ever so proud of the "Geek" mug she was given by a friend when she was at the school.

My ds is at "yob central" I was waiting to pick him up yesterday after an away match at a grammar and overheard a member of the home team saying "it doesn't really count as a win- it's easy to beat stupid people"

It's great to see this thread but I'm horribly afraid the stereotype will be hard to eradicate - like the "social mobility" thing with grammar schools - disproved by every piece of serious research but still widespread in the media.

This thread is indeed fab - but I notice that those who cling to the idea that the top set must be separate (at the same time as insisting on the absolute normality and ordinariness of their clever children) have not given it a glance.

I also suspect that answer would be fine: good for you, you bought a house in the catchment of a leafy comp. Not everyone can do that, which is why there should be grammars .

Christonabike, Hakluyt.

TOSN
But my house is NOT in the naice leafy catchment : its firmly in the catchment for the school that had no science teachers for a term.

Yep, MI. I have loads of stories like that. I tend not to share them on here because I suspect they wouldn't help my argument. But sometimes I can't help myself.

This is a nice thread to read! My kids will be going comp when the time comes.

My mum got bullied for being bright (in the 60s!) and is horrified at this. But there were some pretty damn vile people at my selective private school so...