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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

Is your child in the top set of a comprehensive school? Can I ask you something?

161 replies

Hakluyt · 24/09/2014 09:00

Do they get bullied because they are in the top set?

I have been told on another thread that this is a common experience- is it?

OP posts:
ShabbyCheek · 24/09/2014 21:57

DS in secondary: Top sets for everything, wins prizes, plays a musical instrument in school concerts, hopeless at sport and especially football, is quite slight for his age.

In a comp in a non-glamorous area of South London, with higher than average %s of everything that is thought might cause issues.

No bullying, a wide diversity of friends in top sets and others, does not know anyone or know of anyone who has been bullied. And no one makes comments about high achieving kids, or picks on them, and there is no culture of it not being cool to learn. (which isn't to say that everyone is keen to learn -there are kids who are disruptive etc, but they don't pick on clever or industrious kids, and they are well dealt with by staff).

pointythings · 24/09/2014 22:04

No bullying at our comp, 2 DDs in top sets. It's a very different picture to the way it was in primary, especially for DD1 who was most definitely bullied for being bright.

It's a big comp though, and the top sets as a result are sizeable. It's very hard to bully a group of 12 girls and 8 boys who all like each other and will stick up for each other.

BackforGood · 24/09/2014 22:45

No - for any of mine (dc1 - just left for University, dc2 in Yr11, and dc3 in Yr8).
I too think there's a different culture. dd1 took part in a 'mentoring scheme' last year through being one of the top (15?? something like that) at English in her school and they were drawn together with similar people from other schools in a sort of a G&T thing which they had to plan and then take back into their schools to support / increase reading for pleasure with younger pupils or something, I'm a bit vague on the details At the end of the term, they had a sort of presentation night and all the pupils selected were given T-shirts with I love Geeks,, or It's cool to be a geek or similar on them, which they are comfortable wearing out and about at the weekends, etc. It's just not a bad thing to be 'bright' or 'academic' anymore.

5madthings · 24/09/2014 23:37

Ds1's New school is not private, it is actually just another comprehensive/high school. Prob similar catchment area, actually didn't do as well at ofsted... But still behaviour is better, attainment is better and most important for me the pastoral support is amazing. They have Bern brilliant with ds2 now yr8 who struggled with transition to high school. And ds1 is flying both academically and most importantly with friendships, he is happy, no more tearful boy that we had at his old School.

Original poster
Hakluyt · 25/09/2014 12:44

Bump?

OP posts:
Unexpected · 25/09/2014 14:01

Is 100 responses telling you that people's experiences that top set students are not bullied for being clever not enough?

Original poster
Hakluyt · 25/09/2014 14:11

Not for my purposes, no!

OP posts:
motherinferior · 25/09/2014 14:16

Statistically, it's not going to hold up Grin. I wouldn't trust a stat based on 100 responses.

Original poster
Hakluyt · 25/09/2014 14:31

Under the circumstances, MI- a sample of 50 million wouldn't be enough. But I try...........

OP posts:
mankyscotslass · 25/09/2014 14:38

DS1 is at a large boys comp, he is in YR8 and in top sets for everything except PE. He has never encountered bullying for being in the top sets or for being clever.

TalkinPeace · 25/09/2014 14:43

hak
the trouble is that many who are scared of "bullying the bright" are basing their views on what happened when they were at school in the 60's 70's and 80's
without having taken on board the immense changes in education back then.

FWIW my younger brother WAS bullied for being a "swot"
and my school had huge problems with an "anti academic" attitude
but they were both private, selective well known London single sex day schools Grin

KittiesInsane · 25/09/2014 14:45

Another one here with children mostly in top sets and not bullied for it.

Mind you, DS1 was in second set maths for a while and not bullied there either.

And DS2 diddled around for a while in bottom set German and loved it. Make of that what you will.

The only way you'll find out whether it will happen at your (potential?) school is to put your child there and then ask them.

MissMillament · 25/09/2014 14:46

Hmm.. on my planet they would only look astonished, especially any children who do tease and bully.

LMAO, Pique, I do know the kids I teach a bit better than that!

PiqueABoo · 25/09/2014 18:23

"I do know the kids I teach a bit better than that!"

You're apparently from a more up-market planet then, although this one does have some leaves.

Here except for one old, seasoned, maverick DD has left a trail of teacher behind her who were forced to revise what they knew by-and-by and although a more extreme case, I don't believe she is that unique.

AtiaoftheJulii · 25/09/2014 21:39

Just asked dd2 (y12 now, massive swot :) ) and she actually laughed and asked "who would do that?"

YakInAMac · 26/09/2014 08:37

DS is in a comprehensive in an area of South London I have seen rejected as a place to live several times on MN because it is 'unsafe', or unpleasant (it is neither, of course, or not especially so).
He is not bullied for being in the top stream and sets
Neither are his friends, in top or other sets.
No one comments negatively on doing well, they compete healthily for achievement prizes (which are available in each ability stream) and no-one gets a negative reaction to being awarded one of the days out, etc.
The child with a congenital deformity does not get bullied or teased.
The boy who identifies as gay does not get bullied or teased
(I know both these kids and their parents)
And most of all:
No one has ever been 'eaten alive' in the playground.

The school is opposite a big council estate, it has high ratio of FSM, ESOL, etc. (this seems to scare off many MNers)

It is a happy and successful school.

My brother went to a co-ed grammar in the 1970s and had his head flushed down the toilet on the first day. My DS has never heard of such a thing happen.

HibiscusIsland · 26/09/2014 08:45

Would love to know where it is Yak. It sounds fab

bigTillyMint · 26/09/2014 08:49

Yak, I thought that was an urban mythShock
I(teacher)/my DH (who is a sec DH)/my DC(at sec school) haven't heard of such a thing actually happen. And we live in South London!
So sorry for your brother.

WorraLiberty · 26/09/2014 08:55

I could have written Yak's post exactly, except my DC's school is in East London.

All 3 of my DS's were/are in top sets and none have been bullied for it, or their friends either.

Think about it. Most schools are under immense pressure from OFSTED to help the kids achieve top results. Even the slightest hint of bullying would get stamped on from a massive height.

Daltec · 26/09/2014 09:32

No, quite the opposite. They seem to have become very popular with some of the children in the lower sets (perhaps encouraged by their parents who are hoping it will rub off on them!).

pinkmoomin · 26/09/2014 11:57

I was in the top stream at my rough northern comp in the 80's and never witnessed any bulling for being 'clever'. The teaching, on the whole, was pretty rubbish, but I have happy memories of my school days.

My cousin, on the other hand, went to a well regarded private grammar school in Surrey and experienced terrible bulling at the hands of a gang of bitchy girls jealous of her good looks and talent at English and Art. They slashed her A'Level artwork with a stanly knife and singed her hair with a match (during a lesson).

momb · 26/09/2014 12:02

My ED has experienced bullying, though I don't believe that there is any correlation between her victimisation and her academic success. More the fact that she's petite and seemed an easy target.

pinkmoomin · 26/09/2014 12:02

Also, my friend's daughter is being bullied at the same grammar school for being gifted at running. She won a sports scholarship and competes nationally. I don't believe this bulling would happen in a comp.

prettybird · 26/09/2014 12:10

Not at all. Ds is in S3 (equivalent of Y9 I think - will sit his Nat 5s ie GCSE equivalents in 2016).

He's been in the top set for both English and Maths since they were set early in the first term of S1. English and Maths are the only subjects that are set: it will only be next year (exam year) that they set for the other subjects (more because they are then funnelling down to who will be doing Nat 4 and who will be doing Nat 5) As far as I am aware, none of them get teased for being in the top set Smile

CalamitouslyWrong · 26/09/2014 12:15

DS1 wasn't bullied for being in the top maths set in his old school.

With bullying I really don't think it's actually about whatever it is presented as. People aren't really bullied because they're good at maths or because they have red hair or glasses or whatever. The maths or hair or glasses is just an excuse. Not being in the top set or whatever wouldn't prevent the bullying; there'd just be a different excuse.

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