Advice wanted on wording this letter

[montrealmum]

Dear XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX,
We are writing to express our concern about the Year 8 Religious Studies Visit scheduled to take place this September.
Parents have been informed that girls who wish to attend the trip are required to wear trousers and a headscarf as a mark of respect for the religious institutions they will be visiting.
It is also our understanding that girls who do not wish to wear the headscarves or trousers, or whose families feel it does not accord with their beliefs, will be working on their own at school that day on Religious Studies coursework.
While I fully appreciate the need to dress respectfully on a visit to any religious institution, I feel I must draw a line at my very young daughter being compelled to wear clothing items intended for women to express their sexual modesty. Just as I feel it would be utterly wrong to compel a Muslim girl to remove her headscarf in order to participate in a school activity, so I feel it is wrong to compel my daughter, or any other girl, to wear one.
It would be very easy for us to simply agree to this request on the basis that the headscarf may be seen as nothing more than a temporary fashion accessory, to be worn for an hour or so. However, I am sure that a Muslim would not regard it as such, and nor do we. While respect for religious traditions is surely admirable, is it not the case that respect for our views as atheists and feminists are equally worthy of consideration?
We would urge the school to consider whether such an approach does truly promote community cohesion surely with a little more communication, an agreement could be come to which is mutually agreeable to all. We would hate to think that any girls first exposure to Islam would be one of unnecessary compulsion.
Perhaps an agreement that girls have the symbolism of the headscarf explained to them, and are given the option to wear one on the day, would be more conciliatory. Or at the very least, that an option is given to those girls who choose to abstain that is not tantamount to an internal exclusion.
Given these objections, we find ourselves in the unenviable position of having to choose between our sincerely held beliefs and putting our daughter in a position where she feels excluded and socially isolated.
We therefore reluctantly give our permission for her to attend on the day and follow the strictures set down, but do ask that you give serious thought to our concerns about this matter.
We would like to thank the school for their choice of role models for the girls, such as Rosa Parks and Emmeline Pankhurst, women who understood that following social conventions is not always the best choice to make.
Thank you for your time,
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

You aren't questioning a policy. You are making objections to a request issued by the host institution.
When someone issues an invitation, and sets a dress code, you can either accept and dress accordingly, or decline politely.

If the invitation is to a wedding and they are asking you to wear 'black tie', you would do so, or decline, or commit a breach of ettiquette by showing up in your flip-flops and tank-top.

When the dress code request is based on religious and cultural principles, it is beyond simple etiquette to either ignore or question the request. It is insensitive, rude, and yes, bigoted.

excellent analogy brdgrl

Montreal i have no idea how old you are or what your background but in my extensive experience of a wide variety of people of all differnt religions nationalities and backgrounds respect and niceness to those around us go a bloody long way not to hell but to harmonious and cooperative relations. I have over the years at work sadly been in many violent and tense situations and have found that, psychotic chair wielding, gun totting, knife waving psychopaths aside, most people respond well to niceness and respect genuinely meant or not. In fact even if in the beginning it's not genuinely meant I usually find that it quickly becomes genuine because of the response it receives.
I did not read your deleted thread but I hope that you did not accuse me of sympathising with convicted paedophiles.

OP your recent additions to this thread suggest that you are indeed insensitive, rude, bigoted and moreover an absolute bore.

I find it difficult to understand why you bring Jewish persecution into the thread. How is that in any way relevant?

It seems to me that you're not capable intellectually of doing more than sound bites. When questioned further you appear to have nothing to say.

You've been told to 'get over yourself' more than once on this thread. I'm happy to add my vote to that sentiment too.

happygardening I didn't get to read the deleted thread either but I would like to say that your comments on this thread appear to me to be a very welcome voice of experience, compassion and reason.