bursaries... would this piss you off?

[Gef]

One of the mums at DD's school, her daughter has a big bursary, I think they pay 20%.

but... mum drives a newish car, always wears labels (north face coat etc), and now daughter is probably going on a school trip to Australia
(cost £3000), which my DD won't be going on, because we can't afford it what with the FULL FEES we struggle to pay...

Go on, MN, crucify me, I know I am going to be told it is none of my business, and maybe it isn't, but I think they must have fiddled the figures when they applied for the bursary because they seem to have a lot of disposable income.

"There must be something which stops all reasonably clever children of poor people from all applying "

If you have an 80% bursary on a 15k fee, you'd still have to pay £3k per year, £250 per month.

If you were on, say, a salary of £20k and renting privately, no savings (like your example), that's a huge chunk of your monthly income and I don't think many people would find it doable.

I've found the biggest reason is that people just simply don't realise they can. Of course once they know they could there may be other reasons

I've never felt the poor parents at the school gates was torturous. Yes we know we are poorer but it doesn't make us inferior

DS says they've never talked about bursaries and he doesn't feel different to the others. Well nothing caused by money anyway, he has other social struggles which have improved since starting this school.

I went to state school and talking to teachers about expectations etc is pretty much how it is at state schools to my knowledge so far.

I went to a private school as a pupil who was way way behind the economic pulling power of the vast majority. I had strategies and dealt with the stuff that did happen (whihc was occasionally extreme) - and was OK.

A friend of mine had a scholarship place at a popular private school and left because of the exclusion and isolation and lack of ski-ing trips.

I would be happy with a means tested bursary being based on disclosure of accounts, but not the investigative 'smelling fraud' tone that has been mentioned on this thread.

Anecdotal evidence, it doesn't happen to everyone, many success stories - but it does happen, and the bitchiness of the OP happens, just as other kinds of school gate nonsense goes on at other types of schools.

People need to be honest, not defensive.

You never know the truth that lies behind closed doors.

I became very close to someone who we all perceived as loaded. They had flash cars, lots of holidays blah blah blah. The truth (she became a v. close friend) was shocking amounts of debt and hiding from the debt collectors. Her husband treated it like a game. Utterly shocking!

Yes, but why should their child get a bursary? If I remortgaged my house, travelled first class a few times and bought myself a flash car, then we'd be in debt. But - we'd still be enjoying the material goods we'd bought. We'd be riding round in my Ferrari Testarossa, sporting our suntans and fancy togs - why should we then be entitled to a bursary when some other person was slogging away in a poorly-paid job and living within their means?

As a bursar I must say that "I'm in debt" would cut no ice with me.

I'm not a bursar, I hasten to add! "If I were a bursar" I should have said.

LOL at Ferrari Testorossa

I'm pretty sure you would have to disclose your assets, including the family Ferrari.

The ferrari would be an asset. Unless you had bought it on credit in which case it would also be a liability.

"but not the investigative 'smelling fraud' tone that has been mentioned on this thread."
In the 8 years we have been on bursaries from three different school the bursar has barely even spoken to us let alone interviewed us we just complete the annual forms and send them in. But I do think that bursars are entitled to be suspicious because a least five parents in the 8 years have said to me that they have considered lying on the application form to get a bursary especially to senior boarding schools!

I think as the bursary route becomes more well-known and more applications - worthy and otherwise - are received that some schools will employ professional services such as those used in the US to determine eligibility. You can't expect individual bursars to spend hours doing forensic accountancy work.

And I've already stated if you've nothing to hide why moan about endless forms and home visits from the bursar? Over five years of senior school we're going to be let off over £110 000 in fees surely those parents who are not getting bursaries would like to know that those of us who are are legitimately entitled to this reduction.

I don't know a great deal about bursaries but I am very about the 90% bursary given to my friend and her dp for their only child's place at a terribly well known and expensive public school. One of the parents is a sahp. So how does that work then?

"90% bursary given to my friend and her dp for their only child's place at a terribly well known and expensive public school. One of the parents is a sahp. So how does that work then?"

Easy. They want the child.

That would be a scholarship, Thirdhill, no? Not a bursary? Unless for some accounting subterfuge what was in effect a scholarship got recorded with bursaries.

If friend shared the fact that she has 80% Bursary then I would think she was friend enough to directly ask her how she was funding trip to Oz & new car. No need to speculate?

Then again, if people here can't keep straight what a scholarship is & what a bursary is, then maybe OP's friend has it wrong, too; maybe her child is actually on a scholarship & not a bursary.

There appears an agreement amongst the better schools to limit scholarships to a maximum of 50%, most are nowhere near. However schools control their funds, so they can top up with anything else, usually bursaries.

However if say child is excluded from bursary e.g. non-resident, and bursar et al are keen, you find inexplicably a child could hold several scholarships despite being unable to get say either music or academic places at state schools. In the end, it's the school's call.

Why not a bursery? I'm a SAHM. DH couldn't do his job if I wasn't.

We applied for ds1, were honest and got the bursary. Nothing underhand, nothing unfair about it.
ds2 has both. He only got the bursary because he got the scholarship. Again every one else had the same options as us.

I had a big bursary for my DD and I wear some designer clothes because I get them in charity shops and on Ebay and my parents and DHs DO indeed buy things for my DD such as trips and nice clothes.

Shoot me.

Presumably thousands upon thousands of families could put themselves under the income cut-off point for bursaries if one of them gave up work? I thought bursaries were meant to help the poorest families.

Our "bursary" was 100% this is in a prep school...not well known. We left last year as I couldnt afford for DD2 to go too. The school had their own pot of money....they called it a bursary...it was means tested and I had it for DDs time at the school unless my financial circs changed.

We left because the school was so tiny and there weren't enough girls and also because DD would end up leaving this place for a big secondary (state) and we wanted her to intergrate more with the community.

She's doing well at a lovely local state now.

Very some people think ahead and take advantage of what's out there. I work part time...DH full...we're low income. Should I have worked full time to please those who are bitter?

No, but if you choose to work part time rather than full time then you are not exactly strapped for cash are you?

But I think its the "some people think ahead and take advantage of what's out there" part of your post that makes me think .

Am not bitter btw, would never send my kids to public school!

MrsS- ours is prep too. I know the thread is in secondary but I originally came on to tell the OP she doesn't know from the outside, and stayed.

I think I'm a little fed up of people with bursaries either being bitched about or looked down on. I'm fine with ours. Most people can't afford private education its nothing to be ashamed of.

Probably Veryworried and if they all applied we might not have got ours. But we tried and got it. They have that option too

I'm a bursar