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Secondary education

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Original poster

Recommendations for co-ed boarding schools

206 replies

ohmygosh123 · 18/03/2012 13:34

I'm thinking about options for DD who loves being outdoors, gets on very well with boys and girls, and often better with boys as she is quite sporty and likes to be able to run around. Hence why I am thinking co-ed might be a better choice than an all girls school. Also needs to be academic, but with friendly atmosphere and good pastoral support. Any ideas please, as I'm not that well versed on co-ed boarding schools that take girls from 13.

OP posts:
PostBellumBugsy · 21/03/2012 11:53

Have friends with children at St Edwards & Oundle & both report happy children doing well. Wouldn't say their kids are particularly academic at all - both seem to suit good all rounders well.
ohmygosh, if you are keen on the academic side of things - why not stick to single sex? Definitely my preference - although I realise it is not for everyone.

PastGrace · 21/03/2012 11:55

In my experience schools go in pairs/clusters, and pupils from within that cluster can often spot others (even if from one of the other schools, iyswim). So I can recognise Oundelians from the way they walk (genuinely!), Uppingham pupils from the attitude (often supported by the girls' hair), Harrow from the attitude, Rugby from the attitude...

Like I say, it may not be as evident to those outside it, but for pupils within the school I think it's a skill something lots of people develop.

Trix2323 · 21/03/2012 12:01

Colleger, with reference your Uppingham links: since when has the Daily Mail been a useful source of infomation in deciding on schools?

Trix2323 · 21/03/2012 12:08

Oakham is 55% boarding, which means that almost half the school will not be there at weekends.

Shrewsbury was highly recommended to us for DS by someone at Harrow.

Shrewsbury goes co-ed from 2013 for the year 9 intake, it is currently co-ed at 6th form.

OP, it could suit your DD to be one of the pioneer girls if she is applying for 2013 entry.

happygardening · 21/03/2012 12:09

Kings Canterbury is mainly full boarding with a smallish contingent if day.
The problem is we can all recount stories either positive or negative like PastGraces' about every school. I'm sure there are hideous parents and arrogant children at every school (strangely they seems to go together Shock). What I would like to know if the OP is really looking for and in fact are describing a super selective or just a selective because I don't see Oundle/Kings/Rugby etc as super selective.

happygardening · 21/03/2012 12:11

There are girls in the 6th form at Shrewsbury already again don't even think it would be described as a particularly selective although I suspect new head will change that.

Trix2323 · 21/03/2012 12:14

PastGrace: schools go in pairs/clusters, and pupils from within that cluster can often spot others ... may not be as evident to those outside ... it's a skill something lots of people develop

Excellent observation and now I see exactly what you mean - locally you can tell which school a group of students come from.

I would be more concerned if people thought that such characteristics were evident in a negative way for the rest life.

Colleger · 21/03/2012 12:17

Shrewsbury is not very selective. I've known boys get top scholarships there and they wouldn't get a scholarship at Radley. I went there hoping to really like it as they still offer 50% non-means tested bursaries, but I hated it. Some of the boys were so rude, the maths teacher had never seen a boy, ever, with DS abilities and he was French out of Cambridge. The houses are run in a way that if a boy wants to spend £600 on computer consoles for his house then he can, and one boy reported that his friend is given £200 pocket money per week. They also have a lot of foreign students at sixth form and they all go into top uni's. They did a lecture with four sixth form scientists and they had all came in at sixth form.

Colleger · 21/03/2012 12:18

Straight out of Cambridge, not French!!!

Trix2323 · 21/03/2012 12:21

I'm not a hideous parent and neither are my children, but the two who have been privately educated since age four have an outward confidence that enables them to talk to adults in a sensible way.

My other DC and my Dnephew and Dneice, all of whom are state educated, lack this ability.

I am quite aware that five is not enough to make a general observation.

stealthsquiggle · 21/03/2012 12:24

Colleger - thanks for that - really really useful. We are going to go and have a look, I think - but so far one thing which I really don't like is the huge, impersonal looking dining hall vs dining in houses which some of the others do. The opportunities for problems to go unnoticed seem more to me, somehow.

I have no recent Shrewsbury contacts to poll - one friend from Uni who went there - got a first (Oxford) but has an "interesting" set of values - which may or may not have come from the school. Interestingly his sister went to Marlborough and came out with a "money grow on trees and what one does after uni (Durham) is get a little job in PR until one marries more money" attitude - but that too was a long time ago.

Trix2323 · 21/03/2012 12:29

Colleger, the maths thing that you mention at Shrewsbury would bother me.

I think what you need to know regarding advanced maths is whether there are good numbers doing maths and further maths at A-level that are getting A*. And how is the performance in the olympiads?

Your son sounds exceptional - Harrow would surely want that type of ability? They don't necessarily want only all-rounders, they like brilliance in one or two areas.

On selectivity in general, I don't think very many of the boarding schools are particulary selective, with the exception of one plus the two that are over-subscribed. Although they all claim to be "full" and with waiting lists, I have the impression that if you have a child without problems and you follow the procedures, it is not hard to get in.

Does OP want less selectivity so that her DD can get in easily? Or more, so that the DD is surrounded by clever kids? That isn't clear to me.

milkshake3 · 21/03/2012 12:29

Marlborough views anyone?

happygardening · 21/03/2012 12:31

My Dh (St Pauls) was listening to a programe on the radio about Samuel Pepys (St Pauls) they were reading his letter/diaries etc and he said that you could tell he was an old Pauline. He was also at a meeting with a client and he said he knew straight away from the way he walked talked etc the he was an Old Pauline and when he got home checked in the Old Pauline directory and was right. We were at a regatta once and some boys were walking towards us "they're Paulines" I said to my husband "how do you know?" "because of the way they walk boys from your school always walk like that!" Finally I once watched 15 Old Paulines together all different ages and was struck by how similar their mannerisms and phraseology were.
If you full board this must happen even more I not saying these similar characteristics so clearly observable were negative or positive I'll leave others of you to comment in this.

Colleger · 21/03/2012 12:36

Trix, Harrow can't have DS1. DS2 far more suited to Harrow although we hope Winchester may be interested in him. :)

happygardening · 21/03/2012 12:36

"I really don't like is the huge, impersonal looking dining hall vs dining in houses which some of the others do."
Those with this kind of arrangement are very much in the minority in fact off the top of my head I can only think of four the aforementioned and much criticised Uppingham being one of them!!
Marlborough has a reputation of being for the very smart London type families.

Trix2323 · 21/03/2012 12:44

I can confirm that the dining arrangements at Uppingham are ideal - the whole school stops and sits down for lunch in house, so lunch is an occasion on the scale of 50 students plus several adults (teachers and visitors), rather than several hundered which is what you get at the refectory style places.

Trix2323 · 21/03/2012 12:45

Colleger - oh, you have already heard from Harrow for DS1? Was he on the waiting list? When did you hear?

Colleger · 21/03/2012 12:47

The benefits with canteen style dining is that all the kids eat the same quality food. It really winds me up how we all pay the same fees and yet get different standards of food within the same school. I used to see boys in the Chinese take away at Winchester every night because the food was so poor in their house. I've tasted College food and it was fine but not very much for growing lads. Its the same in all schools though. Are the housemasters using some of the funds for their drinks cabinet? Confused

Colleger · 21/03/2012 12:49

Trix, DS1 never applied to Harrow, it's DS2 that sits the test soon.

happygardening · 21/03/2012 12:55

I believe at Tonbridge the food is organised centrally I can't comment on Uppingham. The housemasters (HM's) at Winchester would be most offended if it was thought they were deliberately providing poor quality meals so that they could stash money away for a couple of bottles of Pol Roger! The food is organised by the house matrons with I'm assuming some input from the HM's. It doesn't bother me its all part of its uniqueness.

stealthsquiggle · 21/03/2012 12:59

Do Oundle not eat in houses, then? I know Sedbergh do, and Winchester.

happygardening · 21/03/2012 13:00

Sedbergh Winchester, Tonbridge, Uppingham and some houses at Eton are the only ones I know of.

Colleger · 21/03/2012 13:09

So you'd be happy to pay £30k for substandard food?

Colleger · 21/03/2012 13:11

More than some, 14 houses at Eton have in-house dining.