"If you're a sahp it's not a job"

[Lunalula]

That phrase. It gets on my nerves so much!
I'm a sahp, I see it as not a career, but yes an unpaid job because simply, someone has to do it.
If you were working to earn a wage you send your dc to nursery, school, ect. So in theory you are paying someone to look after your dc, to care for them, change nappies, feed and/ or prepare bottles/food, teach them the basics and more.
My problem is these people who say a sahp has it easy because it not a job.
I beg to differ. You don't get paid. You can't relax properly. Your children always 'need' you. Nappies changes. Bottle making. Meal prep and cooking/ feeding. Learning games. Being careful of bumps, trips and falls. The list is endless really.
Yes there is plusses which sometimes you can't do in paid work. Toilet breaks as you please. Drink breaks a you please. You can kind of do what you want if DC nap during day. You can have the TV on all day whilst entertaining DC.
So basically, yes, sahp is a job!!!

It’s not a job - in my eyes it’s a vocation - work that I truly believe I’m the best person to do and that I love.
But that would be the same if I WOTH.

Interesting you have used students to back up your point

A student will spend so and so hours working on their studies. Just an example I used because I'm a student. I spend hours studying but I don't get paid for it. It can be hard work, same as being a parent.

I'm a SAHM and wouldn't say that's it's a job either, but as others have suggested I would say that it's certainly (hard) work. I understand why you feel annoyed though because I think unpaid work is generally viewed as inferior to paid work and there is a stigma attached to someone not having a "job".

My own pet peeve is when WOHPs of other toddlers/preschoolers are absolutely insistent that they do everything I do and then work too.

But it isn’t a job and I say that as someone who was a sahm and kinda am now although I work in the evening and weekends I still do the same amount of stuff I did prior school runs, cooking housework etc although now my evening and weekends aren’t free, I certainly don’t see it as a job.

I wouldn't say its a job, hard work, but not a job..

People who work still come home to all the work that a SAHP would have. Washing, cleaning, cooking, etc.

No it’s not a job and it gets in my nerves people saying it is. Look at the dictionary definition of ‘job’.

Many people with jobs have to then go home and also do all the same jobs being a sahp does- does this mean they should be classed as having 2 full time jobs? No.

A student will spend so and so hours working on their studies. Just an example I used because I'm a student. I spend hours studying but I don't get paid for it. It can be hard work, same as being a parent.

I agree, but neither of those scenarios are a 'job'.

What gets to me is the idea I can’t mention any skills I learned through being a parent because it’s not something I learned at work even if it’s totally transferable because that’s twee and demeaning to people who do “real” work.

I learned a lot and grew so much through having my kids and it would make me much more of an asset at work than pre-kids me but it’s a total faux pas to mention it because “parents with jobs have to do that too”. Well I never said they didn’t!

IT IS NOT A JOB!

Yes it is just as tough and draining sometimes as going to work but it isn't a job.

What I think is funny is if you swapped children with a friend and did exactly the same things, paying each other exactly the same ampunt so that ther is no financial gain, suddenly it becomes a "job"

What I think is funny is if you swapped children with a friend and did exactly the same things, paying each other exactly the same ampunt so that ther is no financial gain, suddenly it becomes a "job"

But it wouldn’t be exactly the same. Firstly, you are looking after someone else’s child not your own, it’s different (if it was the same we wouldn’t have all these threads complaining about being asked to do childcare for other peoples’ children in holidays etc). Plus, it is unlikely you would be doing exactly as you pleased and that your friend would be dictating the schedule and activities.

What gets to me is the idea I can’t mention any skills I learned through being a parent because it’s not something I learned at work even if it’s totally transferable because that’s twee and demeaning to people who do “real” work.

Says who?

The majority of women returning to the workplace after extended time off do just that. Draw on their life skills.

But it wouldn’t be exactly the same.

Yes it would.

Yes it would.

You genuinely see no distinction between looking after your own child or someone else’s?

we wouldn’t have all these threads complaining about being asked to do childcare for other peoples’ children in holidays etc

Looking after extra children isn't the same as swapping two same age children over is it?

You genuinely see no distinction between looking after your own child or someone else’s?

No. I would (and have) treated the children of friends as I would treat my own.

But it wouldn’t be exactly the same

Yes it would!

I’m a sahm and it’s the hardest work I’ve ever done, and I’m a qualified operating department practitioner!

And although it’s not paid work, I’m saving our family over £16000 per year in childcare fees by doing the ‘job’ myself, so there is monetary gain in a roundabout way.

WOHP don't do the same work SAHPs do but outside of their 'job' hours as somebody suggested upthread. If that were true nobody would ever pay for childcare.

People get hung up on the semantics of 'job' but basically if somebody asks you what you do and you're a SAHP you don't say 'nothing' do you? Because you don't do nothing.

It’s not a job. A job is something you spend time away from, you get paid for and have some entitlement to rights, annual leave, ssp etc.

Definitely not a job!

It isn’t the same. You look after your child however you want and however suits you. You are employed by me to look after my child, you do it how I say. It is impossible that these two things are identical.

You can hire a cleaner to clean your house or a chef to cook your meals. Or you can do these things yourself. Doing these activities yourself isn’t a job.

Nobody is saying being a SAHM isn’t difficult or hard work. Nobody is saying it isn’t comparable to having a job or isn’t worthwhile. But it isn’t a job. And I was a SAHM for a while.

It certainly takes up as much time and energy as a job. I have a part time professional job and a reception-age child....I'm about to reduce hours, as I don't have enough time/energy for her as I would like. Starting school has not made it easier for me, I work until I collect her from school, then I'm exhausted.
It may not be a job technically, but that doesn't mean looking after your children is not an extremely worthwhile, fulfilling, or demanding task

A thread about a thread @Lunalula - have I hit a sore point?

I'm a working parent. I definitely feel as though I do 2 jobs, although I only get paid for one. I'm knackered, but it's a good kind of knackered (mostly...)

If that’s the case then you have some people working one job and others working two jobs .

Most people who are in paid employment also maintain a house (shopping, cooking, cleaning, organising and being home for repairmen etc) and spend several hours a day with their children (entertaining toddlers early morning, getting school kids dressed and organised and off, acting as the taxi service to nursery/school/after school activities, helping with homework, acting as agony aunt etc). They do this seven days a week on top of paid employment and would devote as much time to these aspects every day as they devote to paid employment so by your definition it would also count as a job. The outsourcing of hands on childcare for a portion of the day is only relevant with kids under school age. So according to you some people have one job and some people have two jobs. Not really sure what you are trying to achieve here?