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Original poster

Would you date a guy who has been divorced twice before age 40?

144 replies

Cocolas · 12/08/2023 14:46

That’s quite a lot of marriages to get through before middle age? Or am I being judgemental?

OP posts:
midsomermurderess · 12/08/2023 16:49

I’d wonder why would he be different third time around.

CharlotteStreetW1 · 12/08/2023 16:57

I would like to formally raise an objection to the title being edited and ruining my joke.

KvotheTheBloodless · 12/08/2023 16:57

Nah, I'd give him a swerve. He's obviously not a great catch with that much baggage, and sounds like he's not a very nice person either.

telestrations · 12/08/2023 16:57

It would give me pause for concern but that's it, by 40 most people have had atleast two substantial relationships

If he has children and what his relationship is like with his ex- wife and attitude towards that would concern me more any drama there and I'd run a mile

NumberTheory · 12/08/2023 16:58

If I knew the details before I got to know him, I’d swipe left. But if I knew him a bit and liked him, I wouldn’t then drop him just because of this. Unless my priority was a stable long term relationship, in which case I’d cool things and start looking elsewhere.

I’d be more concerned that he’d cheated than that he’d got divorced twice.

ihadamarveloustime · 12/08/2023 16:58

Cocolas · 12/08/2023 16:30

He left his first wife and child
His second wife left him after he cheated

This would make him a 'nope' from me.

He ended a marriage then blew up the second one by behaving like an arsehole.

LateSummerLobelia · 12/08/2023 16:59

I'd think he was either a hopeless romantic with poor decision making or he was otherwise somehow socially inept who cannot cope with the slings and arrows of real life.

Either way I think I'd run. Just too much drama.

telestrations · 12/08/2023 17:00

Cocolas · 12/08/2023 16:30

He left his first wife and child
His second wife left him after he cheated

But this guy absoultly not

Charrington · 12/08/2023 17:00

It’s hard when you’ve got to know them and it feels like they’re trusting you and opening up.

Maybe I’d date him for a while if he’s fun to be with but if you have plans for settling down in a long term relationship with dc of your own, I’d let this one go.

I’m sure you wouldn’t bet your wages on a lame horse, don’t bet your future on a proven loser.

Best case scenario is that he makes a go of it with you but you still spend your life wondering if he’ll walk out, or cheat.

He’s only standing in the way of you meeting a decent guy. But he’s not it. And he’s played you, stringing you along and only “opening up” when you’re already halfway in.

I know it’s a very hard place to be though.

Rosscameasdoody · 12/08/2023 17:00

midsomermurderess · 12/08/2023 16:49

I’d wonder why would he be different third time around.

yeah, I would think with that track record it would be unlikely - I’d hope for a bit more maturity with age if he married young the first two times, but the reasons are still pretty huge red flags.

FadeAwayAndRadiate · 12/08/2023 17:01

Rosscameasdoody · 12/08/2023 16:42

I’ll put my coffee down before reading further - that’s twice I’ve spat it all over the screen !! Henry VIII was the first one !!!

Show quote history

😬Grin

FadeAwayAndRadiate · 12/08/2023 17:02

GoodMorningHoney · 12/08/2023 16:42

I don’t think the suggestion is that you’re lying, it’s more of a wtf.

Show quote history

Yep thank you. That pretty much covers it. Just gobsmacked. Like yeah WTF?!

ScribblingPixie · 12/08/2023 17:02

Cocolas · 12/08/2023 16:30

He left his first wife and child
His second wife left him after he cheated

Wow. No, I definitely wouldn't date that man. At least he's told you who he is.

LateSummerLobelia · 12/08/2023 17:03

Cocolas · 12/08/2023 16:30

He left his first wife and child
His second wife left him after he cheated

and this tells you everything you need to know.

Why line up to be the next person in such a story? He's clearly a dickhead at best. Let me guess- it was all his exes fault because... insert reasons that make him look like an innocent victim.

He's clearly a complete utter fucking shit.

xXJoy · 12/08/2023 17:03

In his shoes, I'd be wary for sure.
If there'd been one short marriage followed by a much longer one, I would just think he basically married a girlfriend early in life. But if say he'd had two relationships that lasted about 7 years, and they they just ''grew apart'' he got bored then I'd see him as a serial monogomist.
In the circumstances he's described to you, has he told you why he left his first wife and child. Why did he cheat? It doesn't look good.

xXJoy · 12/08/2023 17:04

I mean YOU should be wary, sorry, I expressed this badly.

Crunchymum · 12/08/2023 17:06

Cocolas · 12/08/2023 16:30

He left his first wife and child
His second wife left him after he cheated

My only question is why you are still entertaining this man?

Divorced twice and both times he's the party at fault? Raise your standards.

DrSbaitso · 12/08/2023 17:08

I would be a little wary and want to know what happened, but it wouldn't be a dating dealbreaker on its own.

Oatycookies · 12/08/2023 17:10

This reply has been deleted

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Original poster
Cocolas · 12/08/2023 17:12

LateSummerLobelia 👍 I agree

OP posts:
DrivingCadillacsInOurDreams · 12/08/2023 17:12

I'm 44, just going through my 2nd divorce. Things happen, through circumstance, through chance, through no fault of anyone. Doesn't make me a bad person and I don't need therapy.

DrSbaitso · 12/08/2023 17:13

Hell, I missed the updates.

Those being the reasons, it would be a hard swerve from me. Why would it not be for you?

FadeAwayAndRadiate · 12/08/2023 17:14

DrivingCadillacsInOurDreams · 12/08/2023 17:12

I'm 44, just going through my 2nd divorce. Things happen, through circumstance, through chance, through no fault of anyone. Doesn't make me a bad person and I don't need therapy.

Exactly this. ^ I think it's awful how some posters are demonising this man on here. They know nothing about him or what lead to the break ups of his marriages.

Totalwasteofpaper · 12/08/2023 17:14

Thats a No from me

Oblomov23 · 12/08/2023 17:15

No.