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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

ALL NEW Road to Recovery for the Recently Ditched No. 4

1000 replies

IfYoureHappyAndYouKnowIt · 12/04/2010 22:42

Dearly Be-Chucked, we are gathered here today because, for whatever reason, our man has dumped us!

OP posts:
teaandcakeplease · 22/04/2010 19:09
Smile
startingovernow · 23/04/2010 00:55

That is amazing, I had just been thinking today of getting a complete new hairstyle or colour! Am already blondish so was thinking of maybe going dark but if the trend for dumplings is baby blond maybe that's the way to go for me too..........

I'm still obsessed with the cleaning & am spending every possible moment doing it. That's why I'm up so late tonight . It's like I'm finally exorcising exh out of the house. Clearing the house of him & making it clean, new & mine. I'm still less then half way through as I'm scrubbing from skirting boards to lights in everyroom & clearing out the junk at the same time. It's a great feeling though & I think when I'm finished this I'll be finally ready to really move on!

teaandcakeplease · 23/04/2010 07:33

Oh yes blonde dumplings!

My DD finally begins pre-school again today, hooray! She's been so bored at home. She only does 2 mornings a week but its perfect right now.

Starting - I wish I could find the motivation to clean like you. I really am doing the bare minimum right now

startingovernow · 23/04/2010 09:54

Waves to all. Tea the bare minumin is great for where you're at, remember I'm a lot further down the line! My dd goes 3 morns a wk aswell, it's great she loves it & ds is going 5 morns.

teaandcakeplease · 23/04/2010 17:09

I'm going to a friend's engagement party tomorrow night where my ex will be as well, at a nice bar. So I bought a nice outfit today (hoping I got my budgeting right on this extra cost ) so that at least I feel nice tomorrow night. I have to say my H having an affair has reduced what little self esteem I had to zero. I'm not trying to win him back btw, I just want to feel attractive, as I don't get to go out much and for once I have a baby sitter.

I bought a tunic/ dress thing, very floral I have to say (but in a nice way) and some 3/4 length black leggings, I don't normally buy leggings but I thought it looked good with the dress/ tunic thing. Also bought a lovely necklace and earrings to compliment it. So all I need to do now is paint my nails tonight once kids in bed. Am I going OTT ladies? Hair cut and now an outfit for tomorrow

ChairmumMiaowGoingItAlone · 23/04/2010 21:46

Dumplings! A couple of friday night tunes before I post properly:

perfect

for all of us with Hs and Xs that never bloody talk to us

ChairmumMiaowGoingItAlone · 23/04/2010 22:25

Erk is that the time!? Long day tomorrow, will probably post properly sunday evening if DS lets me!

startingovernow · 23/04/2010 23:47

Tea, outfit sounds fantastic. Think it's a good idea to look your best as it'll make you feel stronger & better. Don't get pis*ed, in case you get too emotional & beg him to come back etc . Make sure to have a friend by your side.

Waves to all.......

teaandcakeplease · 24/04/2010 07:44

I'm driving Starting so no chance of that

teaandcakeplease · 24/04/2010 07:51

I'm amazed by how few people how commented on this girl's thread

Go and send her some dumpling love.

teaandcakeplease · 25/04/2010 17:07

Where is everyone?

Last night was great, lots of compliments on how I looked , had a great time, my H clearly felt awkward being there, and left before me. I felt sorry for him. Still want to make things better and "fix" him. Sadly I can't. When will I stop wanting to take care of him?

We took DD to a funfair in the afternoon yesterday in the amazing sunshine and she had a fab time and ate candy floss. So hopefully even though my H is a plonker my kids will have lovely memories of these years.

IfYoureHappyAndYouKnowIt · 25/04/2010 20:43

Hi all

Have been tied up all weekend and so not on MN sorry!

Tea - you sound like you're doing really well.

How's everyone else doing?

OP posts:
startingovernow · 25/04/2010 22:43

Hi Tea, glad to hear you had a nice night out & a nice time with dc's also.

Hi Happy, busy here this w'end aswell.

pinksmarties · 25/04/2010 22:49

Hi girls, the end of another weekend. I don't dread them anymore thank god.

Had a couple of days last week when I felt so sad, missing him and our life together etc.

Then I heard something about him (financial) which made me shocked and furious and the sadness evaporated like a puff of smoke.

Had a nice weekend, saw friends yesterday and today which was lovely.

Eating better, which has made me feel better. DCs are behaving, my tulips are looking lovely and I'm feeling calm ish and content ish. Who knows what the week will bring, no traumers of any kind I hope.

Have to take some stuff to the sol tomorow.

I really hate going there, It'll be so nice when this is all over and I never have to set foot in there again.

There are so many sad stories on here by women in unhappy relationships or whose husbands have left them for younger models.

It all just seems so wrong that so many marriages lead to such missery and pain and torment and desperation and that the only people to benefit are estate agents and lawyers.

There must be a better way to live and procreate which doesn't lead to such unhappy conclusions.

I don't know what though........I'll have to have a think because the current way is most unsatisfactory all round !

Hope you're all ok.........Maybees....are you lurking ? I hope so and I hope you're ok.

startingovernow · 25/04/2010 23:13

Hi Pink, glad you're feeling better now. I know what you mean, sometimes I spiral into sadness at where it all ended up. I think I miss the life of having a husband, family etc rather than actually missing him anymore. I can feel so alone at times when dc's are in bed. Sometimes it crosses my head that I'm almost trapped here with dc's. The hassle & expense of getting a babysitter everytime I want to go out makes building a new social life difficult.

I don't know about there being a better way but I do think I've had my eyes opened from counselling etc & I hope to god I'd spot the signs of a twunt a mile off. That is if I ever manage to get out & actually meet someone!

IfYoureHappyAndYouKnowIt · 25/04/2010 23:27

Hi Pink and Starting - a quick hello as I have an early start tomorrow . Hopefully this week will be a little calmer than the last one.

Good to hear you're feeling pretty ok Pink - I'm sure once the endless solicitor stuff is out of the way you'll feel better again.

Hope your weekend went well Starting. I saw quite a lot of friends this weekend which was lots of fun. I do have some nice MN and RL friends !

Wave to all!

Maybees if you are lurking, I am hoping that you will come back and help us with our quest for serenity and perhaps get us in a good modd for the week with a nice tune

OP posts:
pinksmarties · 26/04/2010 12:34

What's happened ?

MN has gone all funny !!!!!!!!

I can't bear it....... Different layout..........it's awfull. Is it just my computor ?????????? HELP

teaandcakeplease · 26/04/2010 13:36

Looks the same on mine. Try closing your internet browser and deleting your cookies and then try again?

pinksmarties · 26/04/2010 18:03

Don't know how to do any of that Tea, have asked for help on chat.

startingovernow · 26/04/2010 18:08

Pink, mine is the same!!!!!!!!! Looks really weird & hard to see threads.

teaandcakeplease · 26/04/2010 18:09

Click on tools
Go down to "internet options" and select it
Then in general tab there should be "browsing history"
Select delete.

Job done, cookies deleted.

Let's see if I've confused you

I'm not a techie at all so probably been totally rubbish.

teaandcakeplease · 26/04/2010 18:09

These are the instructions for internet explorer

startingovernow · 26/04/2010 18:12

Tea, just tried deleting cookies made no difference. Am going to reboot now & see if that does it.

startingovernow · 26/04/2010 18:21

No joy . Pink let me know if someone comes up with a solution.

pinksmarties · 26/04/2010 19:19

Starting, Ive done it !!!!!!!!!!!! thank f*ck.

Lady on chat told me to go to customise. I then clicked the button for the choice on the left.....i think it said NEW and then it was ok again........try that.

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