penetrative sex : anyone learned how to orgasm that previously couldn't?

[padboz]

I'm a proper wanker I know how to make myself come and he knows too, but part of me feels that I could come through penetration alone. has anyone that used to find it impossible got any tips?

---

If you've found this page in your search of the best sex toys that can help you achieve orgasm and have been recommended by fellow Mumsnet users, you might find our guide to the best sex toys for women useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ

no...I'm in the same boat as you....wish I could tho....

probably not going to help but I never did with exh. then had another partner and did. not sure why it was different, although sexual chemistry was very high and he was very knowledgable iyswim. also he knew exactly how to find g spot and had plenty of attention before penetration so suspect was just more 'revved up'. sadly, due to complicated personal circumstances have now agreed to be 'just friends' sigh. he should honestly run training courses

I have wondered about this, when I have been with men who are my height or slightly shorter, I can with men who are taller than me I can't.

you need to stimulate your G sot.

it is basically the inside of your clit. the easiest way is to stick a couple of pillows under your bottom so that its raised a little.

that way when he thrusts into to it will hopefully rub your G sot.

ByThePowerOfGreyskull - I have found exactly the same. My ex was a foot taller than me and I think we just didn't align right. My current is 2 inches taller than me and once we got into it it was multiple orgasms all the way.

Never managed it penetratively...27 years and a fair few partners of trying! Happily resigned to doing what I know works

I find the only way I can do it is with a vibrator on my clit. DH is completely ok with it. I'm sure that with a bit more effort we could do it 'naturally' but with a FT job and a 2 year old I just want to get in an get the job done.

LOL at Bumperlicious!!!

The biggest sex organ is the brain. If you feel relaxed and hit on the right fantasy, iyswim, the rest will follow.

New partner? is a gamble though...

I also find it difficult to reach a climax "hands-free" - and agree with BoF and Mamazon.

I've also been doing a couple of yoga positions which supposedly "improve the flow of sexual energy" and whether it's due to those, the placebo effect, or pregnancy hormones, I'm certainly reaching orgasm much more quickly and easily during sex at the moment.

Basically, you lie on your back and "sit up a wall" (bum and legs resting upwards on the wall), then open your legs as wide as you can and flex your toes outwards. Hold the position while doing a bit of deep-ish chest breathing and visualise everything "opening up". Hold for as long as you like, but stop if it starts to feel uncomfortable. Try and keep the rest of your body relaxed and your back straight.

Worth a go!!

yes didn't used to be able to, but it kind of happened one day...

not sure how or why, i think I just was more relaxed. Once you know it's possible it's then easy to do it again.

Not much blardy use now though!! you really do need a bloke in order to do this

btw was about 5 years into 'sex life'

main thing is believing you can, because you can, but it's surprising how much impact having no faith in this can have iyswim.

I think most women probably can if they believe in it and keep practising and relaxing and so on, which I do think gets harder and harder in the same relationship because of all sorts of issues, and pressures and so on

maybe everyone ought to go and shag someone they don't really love/care about for one night, see what happens...deffo easier if you don't really know/deeply love the person I think
as you are not so worried

Oh God please someone else post something, I SO don't want this particular threadkill!

Oh I can kill it for you Flight.

I've had one orgasm in my whole life.

On the day God gave out that skill, I was in the queue for 'a good grasp of the written word'.

Still, you can't have it all.

LOL sorry 'good grasp of the written word'

That's quite wonderful.
Do not resign yourself though

I was about 32, well I didn't have sex till Iw as 27..everyone gets there in the end, (apart from my granny i think)

Oh I think I'm beyond hope. I've been at it for 11yrs. Not constantly, I do stop for liquid refreshment but I just don't have that particular skill set.

Did I mention that I'm quite good at puzzles? I'm lucky really.

you are also very very funny.

I suppose you have tried the sitting on top position...? I'm not sure I can go into finer details on a public space such as this but there are definitely ways iygwim

hmm. we need a code.

The single, solitary time it happened? On top. I know to what you refer. I have an excellent theoretical knowledge. I cried when it happened you know. I was so utterly overwhelmed that dh thought he'd caused an injury. That was 10 years ago. I doubt it will happen again. Never mind, eh?

I cried too I think

it was definitely a weird moment.

another very good way is to get on top and rather than the normal leaning over and kissing him, sit up and lean back a bit. raqther than bouncing up andf down like a tigger on speed, rock your pelvis back and forth.

once he is inside of you the natural shape of him will rub against your G spot.

and he gets a good look at your boobs which always makes Dps night.

I've had a few penetrative orgasms but can never predict them. I find that my partner has to do something but I am not sure what that something is. It is different for me, not more intense or better at the time, or anything, but massively long lasting unlike anything else. Relaxation definitely helps me, but from all directions, not just having a drink, or being with someone I love, or a good position, or the right time in my cycle, or the right foreplay... just sometimes it happens. My DP (of 5 months so not an expert now on long term relationships) has got me there 3 times, not aware he was doing so, and has been surprised how long the feelings last for me.

I learned how to do it . For me it's about getting fully "revved" up beforehand - lots of stimulation around the clit so you're just on the edge. Then by the time he slips it in I orgasm immediately really.

Oh crikey

I can't with penetrative sex alone, but dh thinks I can.

Not really a joke,it just makes things easier when I am tired and don't really want to make the commitment iykwim.

Can't you just angle yourself so that you can press the buttons while he controls the joystick

as it were