can i get some un mumsnetty hugs and sympathy please

[Mamazonabroomstick]

think its all over with DP.

I am heartbroken.
I feel sick and just want to bursdt into tears.
Can't really be that open with rl friends as im the "strong one" that doesn't really get effected by this sort of stuff.

don#t get me wrong they know im hurting and they are sympathetic but all they keep saying is that i can do better.

Yes of course i can. but i didn't want to.

Its all just so horrible

Oh Mamazon - I'm so sorry. I did see one of your other threads, and I had no idea it was you.

Mamazon, how are you this evening? Sorry it's turned out as it has.

I have had a brief chat with some firends today, they have echoed what has been said here.

I feel utterly shite still but i guess thats to be expected.

He still protests his innocence and has CC me an email he sent Facebook outlining this.

I really want to belive him. i can't of course but i want to.

stupid as it souns but i feel so crap all i want is a cuddle from him

i am seriously pathetic i know.

it's ok to want it- he meant a lot to you.

Wow Sorry this has happened.

I remember reading those first two threads but obviously not knowing they were from the same person. Knowing that, and now also knowing what you have said on this thread and piecing it together - you have done so well to end it. This will save you possibly years of heartache as he sounds like a total arse and a bloody liar.

You gave it a shot, he tripped up not once, not twice, but on several occasions and you can do better than this LOSER.

Look after yourself in the meantime and know that you will get over this, you know you will. The old cliche - time's a healer - it's true though.

Best of luck.

how are you feeling today?

Aw Mamazon, not been on for a few days, just seen you on FB, so didn't know the background till now.
Not much anyone can say that can make it better, but we CAN reinforce the truth - that he is thoughtless noboid dickhead arsehole and in time you will be sooooo glad he's not around to cause you further pain. X

well the plot just gets more and more confusing.

He has had an email back from facebook - i have seen it, it's real- confirming his side of the story.

they are saying that they have indeed deleted the account in error but that they can't re issue it as its already cyber dust.

god i haven't a clue what to do now.

Was the FB deletion the deal breaker, or was it the other issues that made you feel like you couldn't trust him? He can be right as far as his version of events, but trust is really just a feeling, isn't it?

It wasn't just the FB stuff though was it?

mamazon, remember what you said the other night

you outed your previous name-changed posts about his vile behaviour so that you would not be tempted to go back to him

the FB thing, from all you have said, is really just the tip of the iceberg

isn't it ?

yeah it was the straw that broke the camals back i guess.

But we had been really settled and very hapy prior to this incident.
Whilst the other things were shitty and vile and certainly not forgotten, we had gotten past them.

We were sorting his house out to be rented so he could move in, i was spending more time with his kids...everything seemed to be going exactly where i wanted it to.

I don't know whether this changes everything or if i could just go back to how it was.

It's certainly made me look at everything again.
I know im weak and feeble.

You are not weak or feeble. You are someone who has loved someone and then treated badly. You can't just switch off feelings when you have cared for someone.

God, it has taken me 16 years to get over idiot boy someone. It has barely been 16 hours for you.

had you actually told him it was over mamazon ?

yes i told him i couldn't do it anymore.
he has said that he doesn't want us to split, that he wants us to have the life together we had talked about.

promised me the world.

when i thought he had been chatting up women on FB i didn't want to even aknowledge a word of it. but now......

now what??

so many highs and lows

is this how you want the rest of your life to be ?

remember how I told you a couple of weeks ago that you didn't know him (can't think of the actual thread, but I was questionning the validity of protestations of love, "soulmate" etc when a r'ship is only a few months old)

you still don't

you seem unable to trust him, if not this, it will be something else that is bothering you

I knew after 2 months that my boyfriend was the one for me. Nearly 14 years later we are v happily married. You can know sooner just as you can spend years with someone and not want to marry them/not love them. I agree that this isn't great atm though for Mamazon.

fab, I think your example is the exception to the rule, tbh

anyway, lets not rehash that

we don't need a thread filled with examples of how someone met their dp and got married within weeks and now they are ver ver ver happy

it can get kinda competitive "ooh, yes, I met him Monday at 9am, we moved in together at 10am, got married at 11am and by 2pm we had 6 kids...."

...and we still have sex eighteen times a day

Wasn't meaning it like that at all .

No sex here. No allowed atm. Double .

fab, don't take my irreverance to heart lovey

joining you in zipping it, BOF

-x-

thing is, we really were very happy. whether we would have been together when we are 90 i don't know. but he made me happier than i have been in a very long time.

He may not have been Mr Right but he was Mr made me happy for Right now iyswim.

I dont think i can just say ok lets just pretend this didn't happen as, as you say Scarey i have obviously reacted this way because of the things that have gone before. but then again, do i want to end something that did make me happy over a miscommunication?

confused.com

Just don't want to annoy anyone. Doing that elsewhere.

BoF if you manage to zip it for more than 3 posts i will be stunned!