Aurynne
I shall step out of my "this must be a wind up" stance for just once second, and offer a piece of personal experience for you, just in case you are willing to listen and not just shrug it off with smiles and hugs.
Maybe it will open up your mind to other peoples emotions, just for long enough to gain some understanding of your partners mums situation.
After only 7 months together, you are very lucky to have an invite to stay for Christmas at all. Especially as your boyfriend is still married to someone else.
MY MIL find it very hard to accept her other sons new girlfriend into her life and her house. Like you, his new girlfriend has been with him under a year. He is still married, and for complicated reasons cant finalize any divorce for some time. He is very much in love with his new girl friend, Rachel, and he thinks she is very good for him. He met her before his marriage ended, but did not form a relationship with her until after he moved out of their marital home. He has been married 5 years. His wife, Miranda, has not cheated, but they have other issues, which has hurt my Bil very much.
Although My MIL appreciates that Rachel is good for him, and she is probably very nice, and that he loves her very much, and that Miranda has treated him badly, this is all too new for her to accept. She may keep a brave face, and be smiling and polite, but this not be portraying her real emotions.
She is mourning the loss of her youngest sons marriage. She is sad for all the hopes and dreams they all had when these two young people got married. She has years of knowing Miranda, years of loving Miranda even though she hurt her son. Now she has to accept that there will be no grand children, she will no longer be in family with Mirandas mum and dad whom she had become very friendly with. Her extended family is broken up, and a new girl has entered the scene.
When I stayed at her house this summer, she was crying about it to me. Yet, was happy and cheerful in the face of this new girl who was just introduced to her for the first time. The new girl and her son are moving in together and she has no choice but to accept it.
I can just IMAGINE the turmoil she would feel if New Girl emailed her and tried to organize a different Christmas than the one she had planned.
Please show some respect to your boyfriends mum, and please bear in mind that she might have other emotions to contend with than those she shows to you.
Also remember, that your boyfriends mum is also female like yourself, and with more years under her belt than you, she will see through "honesty", "charm" and "sweetness" and label it correctly with "female catty attitude and bitchiness". (Like many other posters here )