please help my husband left today

[fadingaway]

11th August would have been our Silver wedding anniversary.

We have 5 children.

I was at work. My 11 year old rang me in floods of tears. He had taken the two youngest to nursery, left a note saying he would always love them, and just went. Left a note for me saying he's been seeing someone else for two years.

I have nobody in RL, I only had him. The younger children just keep asking for daddy, the older ones are in bits. I would have laid down my life for him. Please help me. I don't think I can cope with this. His phone is off. I don't have a clue where he is.

Good to hear that you are feeling so strong FA.

As for his texts... they all contradict eachother... one the reason is that you had nothing then the next he can't decide whether to come back and thinks about you all 24/7 WTF??? And now he is blaming the DCs. He is clearly trying to justify himself in his own mind but can't because there is no justification for the cowardly manner in which he has handled all this and still continues to do by communicating only by text.

I know you are not looking forward to Sunday but judging by how much of a coward he has been in the last 2 weeks he will be planking himself at the thought of the devastation of what he has done that he has to face.

Well done for keeping yourself busy and managing to keep things as normal as possible for DCs..... you are supermum/woman in my eyes.

Happy birthday for tomorrow.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FA

Happy Birthday! Hope that you can enjoy the day with your children.

Not sure how appropriate 'Happy Birthday' is in the circumstances, but you know what I mean.

Happy Birthday FA, hope you can somehow have a nice day with your children

Happy Birthday FA
Hope all goes OK this weekend.

Happy Birthday FA. We will all be thinking about you this weekend. Good Luck

happy birthday FA xxxxx

Happy birthday FA. You're doing so well.

Happy birthday, FA. Was going to remind you to keep on swimming, but good God girl, you're surfing! Painting, lugging boilers, mothering 5 kids and still managing to look foxy with a new haircut - I take my hat off to you.

I hope it helps to know, when you face DH tomorrow, that you have the admiration, respect and loving thoughts of about a million MNers behind you.

If he doesn't realise tomorrow what he may very well have lost, then he's a bigger fool than we already think he is.

x

Happy birthday sweetheart.

Try not to think too much about tomorrow until it happens. All you can do is just live through it... We'll be here for the debrief Sunday night.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY. good luck tomorrow. x

Happy Oh Happy Oh Happy Birthday to youuuuu.

Big love to you from our household x x x x hope you've had a special day

Oh gosh yes TOMORROW...

Good luck, be thinking about you, strong strong strong independant woman

Good luck tomorrow FA ...

Message withdrawn

Hi, just dropping in to see whats occuring, looks like you are busy, good, hope its doing something special ( rather than lugging furniture )

want you to know you have our full support for tomorrow, will check back and see how things are going.

goodnight, sleep tight.

will be thinking of you all tomorrow FA x

wish you luck and strengh for today - hope he is on bended knee begging for you forgiveness - but also hope you are strong enough to handle it.

Whatever you do or say will be ok - nothing you do will be anywhere as bad as he has done to you these past couple of weeks.

Hold your head high you are brilliant and a real inspiration, will check for update later.

Thinking of you today FA x

thank you so much, and the the happy birthdays too. FIL called with my eldest DD and her boyfriend.They stayed an hour (which I didnt mind at all because DD has important exams next week and is busy studying, but all FIL did was talk incessantly about his upcoming holiday. On his way out the door he asked "any news?" like it was an afterthought. )

The message DH sent said he missed the DC but not the constant noise and shouting and screaming and bickering that goes on. I admit four children does get noisy and there are times I am tempted to scream shut up at them, but it has never drive me to shag someone else...

Ad yet I am ashamed to say I thought for a moment IF the kids were quieter, IF they were seen and not heard, then he would be happy. That is a terrible admission but I have thought it and it has gone now.

I had a birthday card from him yesterday and I threw it straight away. It was a horrible cheap piece of tat obviously from the nearest corner shop and I thought is that all I am worth now? It was just a card but it upset me all over again.

DD3, DD4 and DS are desperate for him to come today. I just want it all to be over.

I will report back this evening.

Thank you all again.

You will handle today in the very same way you have done everything else, with control and dignity. Good luck.

thats low, to blame the children. his children, who he made. what a prick. you and the dear children are the suffering innocents in this.

maybe FIL doesnt want to upset you/is in denial/is colluding and embarrassed....

sorry to hear about the cheap greeting, wtf is he thinking??

gosh, my heart is f'ing pumping, am so angry.

wishing you a productive day, whatever arrangements you make, ask for it in writing if you can. all our very best, hope to hear from you later.

Keep remembering what you said: it's your decision. And whilst it might seem in the best interests of the kids that he come home, it isn't if he can't be a proper father to them and understand what it's like to live with children. He might be a better dad to them if he doesn't live with them full-time (whilst still being a shitty human being).